Top Law Schools

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Any comments would be greatly appreciated!!!

Anybody??

What I learn:

you want to be a lawyer
you can empathize

What I do not learn:

why you would be a strong candidate for law school

I would change:

show me why you would be a strong candidate for law school.

Not very compelling. You use one example that shows why you want to be a lawyer. I receive no other insight about your life experiences. You answer, "Why Law?" But you don't allow the reader to see why we should accept you? Your statement does not contain any achievements, does not show how you overcame an obstacle, how your work experience might be better then others, how your background could contribute to the practice of law or the classroom. It needs more meat.

Yeah I see what you're saying, I'll work on making it more compelling, thanks for the comments!