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Is this too risky or is it appropriate? Above all else, I want to be honest, but I don't want to bombard the adcoms with unnecessary gory details.

"The purpose of this addendum is to elaborate on the leave of absence noted on my academic transcript from <undergrad X>, and to highlight the improvement in my GPA from a 2.0 in my first semester of college to a 3.7X for the remainder of my undergraduate career.

At age seventeen, during my first semester at <undergrad X>, I developed a shameful and serious substance abuse problem and failed to complete final work in my courses. I obtained an extension into my second semester, but I continued to self-destruct and was unable to submit all of my incomplete work as I had hoped, resulting in a 2.0 GPA for my first semester and a status of academic probation. Based on the advice of my medical team, and with the best wishes of my academic dean, I withdrew from all remaining classes during my second semester with no disciplinary sanctions. I devoted the subsequent semester to regaining my health and reconsidering my priorities at home with my family's care.

I was lucky to make a complete recovery, and my performance since then demonstrates that my first semester of college was not a reflection on my academic ability or my ability to adjust to new challenges. In the semesters after I returned to <undergrad X> from my medical leave, I earned a cumulative GPA of 3.7X and was named to the Dean's List twice while working multiple part-time jobs, volunteering in my community, conducting research in my field of study, and competing on the university <activity> team. After graduating from college, I started work at a <industry> company with over 250,000 employees – a position requiring long hours and in a field in which I lacked any prior experience or education. After my first year of work, I was rated in the top 20% of employees at my level and was recognized with several awards for my performance.

In short, I am grateful to have recovered my health and am proud to say that my failures have shaped me into a more honest, purposeful, and resilient person."

I would suggest you turn this into either a PS or DS if you want to go into detail. Otherwise, a short paragraph outlining your problem should do it. What you have now wouldn't work... too many extraneous details and a few missing pieces of information, IMO.

I have a personal statement that's already incredibly strong about my family/cultural background and some really intense service/activism accomplishments. I think it's my biggest asset (obviously besides #s) so I really don't want to replace it.

could you elaborate on what details you feel i'm missing and which i should remove? this addendum has to explain the "interruption of education" and "academic probation" questions so i was afraid to keep it short and be seen as hiding stuff. But i agree it's too long as it is.

What was the nature of your substance abuse problem?
You can just say it screwed up your grades. Dont need to explain about the extension.
Your medical team?
How did you actually recover? Sitting at home and thinking real hard?

Anonymous User wrote:Is this too risky or is it appropriate? Above all else, I want to be honest, but I don't want to bombard the adcoms with unnecessary gory details.

"The purpose of this addendum is to elaborate on the leave of absence noted on my academic transcript from <undergrad X>, and to highlight the improvement in my GPA from a 2.0 in my first semester of college to a 3.7X for the remainder of my undergraduate career.

At age seventeen, during my first semester at <undergrad X>, I developed a shameful and serious substance abuse problem and failed to complete final work in my courses. I obtained an extension into my second semester, but I continued to self-destruct and was unable to submit all of my incomplete work as I had hoped, resulting in a 2.0 GPA for my first semester and a status of academic probation. Based on the advice of my medical team, and with the best wishes of my academic dean, I withdrew from all remaining classes during my second semester with no disciplinary sanctions. I devoted the subsequent semester to regaining my health and reconsidering my priorities at home with my family's care.

I was lucky to make a complete recovery, and my performance since then demonstrates that my first semester of college was not a reflection on my academic ability or my ability to adjust to new challenges. In the semesters after I returned to <undergrad X> from my medical leave, I earned a cumulative GPA of 3.7X and was named to the Dean's List twice while working multiple part-time jobs, volunteering in my community, conducting research in my field of study, and competing on the university <activity> team. After graduating from college, I started work at a <industry> company with over 250,000 employees – a position requiring long hours and in a field in which I lacked any prior experience or education. After my first year of work, I was rated in the top 20% of employees at my level and was recognized with several awards for my performance.

In short, I am grateful to have recovered my health and am proud to say that my failures have shaped me into a more honest, purposeful, and resilient person."

I received a couple weeks of inpatient treatment in a hospital and continued psychiatric treatment for about a year afterward. I don't wish to go into detail about the nature of the substance abuse. I was worried the hospital part would make it sound like I was shooting up heroin or something, it wasn't like that - I was given a diagnosis of depression and anxiety.