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My New Personal Statement - Please Critique

Posted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 3:05 pm
by baaron008
Taken down, PS submitted to law schools.

Re: My New Personal Statement - Please Critique

Posted: Sun Mar 04, 2012 1:49 pm
by NomNom
Your story is good...

Your sentence structure, grammar and spelling are not. Some glaring things are the very first sentence. Did you do the minimal spell check? Why capitalize "panic disorder" one place and not in others?

Re: My New Personal Statement - Please Critique

Posted: Sun Mar 04, 2012 2:00 pm
by jrthor10
I like most of it--not fond of the part about Sam's Club. I would rather read about how overcoming and dealing with your panic disorder has made you more ready for law school, instead of a small blurb about a job at Sam's Club.

Re: My New Personal Statement - Please Critique

Posted: Sun Mar 04, 2012 4:56 pm
by Jsa725
.

Re: My New Personal Statement - Please Critique

Posted: Sun Mar 04, 2012 6:43 pm
by CorkBoard
Axe the sam's club stuff, it's not as compelling as some of the other stuff you've mentioned. My edits are in bold.

Removed

Re: My New Personal Statement - Please Critique

Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2012 10:45 am
by NomNom
Corkboard made good edits.

Re: My New Personal Statement - Please Critique

Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2012 12:29 pm
by baaron008
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Re: My New Personal Statement - Please Critique

Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2012 12:41 pm
by baaron008
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