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First draft of PS
Posted: Mon Jan 09, 2012 12:38 am
by JC_wu
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Re: First draft of PS
Posted: Mon Jan 09, 2012 1:18 am
by thederangedwang
Are you working as an accountant now or are you employed in a favorable fashion? I understand your reasons being a first generation chinese immigrant myself, but the legal market is really bad right now so if you do have a steady good paying job, you might want to reconsider law...at least postpone it for nowl
Re: First draft of PS
Posted: Mon Jan 09, 2012 7:21 pm
by kublaikahn
This is an excellent PS, just poorly written. The second to final paragraph should be reconsidered as well. Very few applicants will have the confidence and maturity to say they passed on an athletic scholarship because they were not ready academically. And you have a valid excuse for not being prepared. You are definitely on the right track. Work on the grammar and flow of the piece. And rework the penultimate paragraph. Your tone goes very quickly from really honest and genuine to a bit contrived.
Re: First draft of PS
Posted: Mon Jan 09, 2012 9:57 pm
by JC_wu
Thank you for the comment and advices. It's just the first draft. Just want to get some feedback on it.