Top Law Schools

elizcbeth wrote: From the very first moment I stumbled upon Northwestern Law in my research, the question has not been “Why Northwestern?” but “Can I even survive Chicago’s frigid winters?” (you don't even reference the winters again... i don't know, it sounds kind of awkward to start out with... i would change the 1st sentence..)
I was firstly impressed by the unique approach taken by Northwestern to foster a collaborative learning environment, which has been an important consideration as I consider potential law schools. Different from the marketing ploys of some schools, Northwestern truly creates a friendly and welcoming atmosphere as I experienced on my visit and further corroborated by my interactions with current Northwestern students who are astonishingly open to my frequent questioning. (this sounds REALLY vague.. I could replace Northwestern with any other top school and it would sound the same. You don't mention anything unique about NU. "Collaborative" - could be any school. get rid of this.).
Secondly, I would love to take advantage of the many opportunities available to students in Business Law, especially the chance to enroll in a course at the Kellogg School of Management and to participate in the Small Business Opportunity Center. (this is good. expand upon this instead- connect it w/ something in your background to make it truly effective).
Finally, I believe Northwestern’s singular emphasis on work experience produces a student body notable for their dedication to the pursuit of the study of law. I wish to surround myself with likeminded others who are curious, passionate, and unwavering in their studies. (this is good but you should expand on why ppl w/ work experience are an asset. curious/passionate/unwavering also sounds vague - why can't K-JDs have those characteristics? I don't think WE leads to that, but more to qualities like: management, leadership, working in a team, etc... )


It just seems so... disjointed. Also, I'm having trouble with the comma placement in that first sentence. Should there be a comma in there? Like, "Why Northwestern?", but "Can I survive...."

Thanks for all your help, Top-Law-Schools.com users!!