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Please read this and tell me if you like me at all. Tell me if you'd consider accepting me into your law school. On the other hand, tell me if I should go away and die or something.

Edit.

Thanks for the quick feedback, I'll get to work.

I don't see enough of you in the statement. The overarching lesson is compelling but it feels more a narration about other people. Things are bad in other places that other people have experienced (your grandmother, but not you) and you did a legal internship, great :/. What is it about your experience that makes me want to admit you?

Don't use the term "coin slot"

Total Litigator wrote:Don't use the term "coin slot"

Word

Well aren't we submissive

NYC Law wrote:Well aren't we submissive

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Joeshan520 wrote:I don't see enough of you in the statement. The overarching lesson is compelling but it feels more a narration about other people. Things are bad in other places that other people have experienced (your grandmother, but not you) and you did a legal internship, great :/. What is it about your experience that makes me want to admit you?

I see what you mean. I guess I was focusing more on a general sense of how those things have steered me where I want to go.

This is actually a pretty good start. I have some issues with some phrasing, but I think there are things to deal with before you get to that point.

Do you already have a diversity statement concept? If I were you, I'd split this into two essays- a PS about your grandma and the juvie court stuff and a DS about your father and T&T.

paratactical wrote:This is actually a pretty good start. I have some issues with some phrasing, but I think there are things to deal with before you get to that point.

Do you already have a diversity statement concept? If I were you, I'd split this into two essays- a PS about your grandma and the juvie court stuff and a DS about your father and T&T.

Thanks,

I was sort of torn on whether or not to do a DS or straight PS. I think that kind of shows. I'll take your advice, and see if I can split them up.

Feel free to PM them to me.

paratactical wrote:Feel free to PM them to me.

Will do. Thanks for the help!

Good luck.

I feel like everyone on this forum is starting their personal statements with childhood anecdotes! Why is this?! The pattern gives me pause.

Law schools are hoping to enroll clever adults with decent accomplishments. Spread the word!!

Best, Dani

Northwestern seems to prefer clever adults with professional accomplishments, but other law schools value many other qualities as well.

dani_burhop wrote:I feel like everyone on this forum is starting their personal statements with childhood anecdotes! Why is this?! The pattern gives me pause.

Law schools are hoping to enroll clever adults with decent accomplishments. Spread the word!!

Best, Dani

At least it's not as retarded as lots of smilies, exclamation points and signing your posts!!!

Sunshine and puppies!!!,

para

dani_burhop wrote:I feel like everyone on this forum is starting their personal statements with childhood anecdotes! Why is this?! The pattern gives me pause.

Law schools are hoping to enroll clever adults with decent accomplishments. Spread the word!!

Best, Dani

Apparently they like humble, clever, and accomplished adults.

MRsimon wrote:

dani_burhop wrote:I feel like everyone on this forum is starting their personal statements with childhood anecdotes! Why is this?! The pattern gives me pause.

Law schools are hoping to enroll clever adults with decent accomplishments. Spread the word!!

Best, Dani

Apparently they like humble, clever, and accomplished adults.

+1

Ha! Well, I apologize for the outburst. No harm intended. I will probably still use emoticons in a way that agitates the masses, however. Boards are low affect and require some emoting, IMHO. Best, Dani

dani_burhop wrote:Ha! Well, I apologize for the outburst. No harm intended. I will probably still use emoticons in a way that agitates the masses, however. Boards are low affect and require some emoting, IMHO. Best, Dani

Dani, I'm not sure where you are getting your info from. These law schools have our transcripts and resumes. They know our accomplishments. If an applicants recent accomplishments make for the best statement then that is what they should focus on, but many college kids have a bunch of 'vice president of x student org' or '40 hours of commserve at x place' and these don't really set someone apart either. Your blanket statements that childhood events are a bad a idea are baseless. An honest, well-written illuminating statement is always the way to go and people find that material in different events in their lives.

What are you basing your black and white assessments on?

kwais wrote:

dani_burhop wrote:Ha! Well, I apologize for the outburst. No harm intended. I will probably still use emoticons in a way that agitates the masses, however. Boards are low affect and require some emoting, IMHO. Best, Dani

Dani, I'm not sure where you are getting your info from. These law schools have our transcripts and resumes. They know our accomplishments. If an applicants recent accomplishments make for the best statement then that is what they should focus on, but many college kids have a bunch of 'vice president of x student org' or '40 hours of commserve at x place' and these don't really set someone apart either. Your blanket statements that childhood events are a bad a idea are baseless. An honest, well-written illuminating statement is always the way to go and people find that material in different events in their lives.

What are you basing your black and white assessments on?

I would just like to add on that I am sorry if I am riding u exceptionally hard or if i have been more a douche than neccessary..having said that....imho the advice u have given is not very good...a personal statement is meant to be PERSONAL, and a person's childhold...or an anecdote is the perfect manifestation of such....the personal statement is not the place to highlight what makes you ready for law school, rather it should be a place to tell the ad comm what makes you "you".....the ad comm as plenty of other info to make the decision of whether or not you are rdy for law school (Lor, transcript, resume, lsat-gpa score)....

kwais wrote:

dani_burhop wrote:Ha! Well, I apologize for the outburst. No harm intended. I will probably still use emoticons in a way that agitates the masses, however. Boards are low affect and require some emoting, IMHO. Best, Dani

Dani, I'm not sure where you are getting your info from. These law schools have our transcripts and resumes. They know our accomplishments. If an applicants recent accomplishments make for the best statement then that is what they should focus on, but many college kids have a bunch of 'vice president of x student org' or '40 hours of commserve at x place' and these don't really set someone apart either. Your blanket statements that childhood events are a bad a idea are baseless. An honest, well-written illuminating statement is always the way to go and people find that material in different events in their lives.

What are you basing your black and white assessments on?

Well, I'm an editor. I've read hundreds of personal statements. The kids I help get into the best law and graduate schools all wrote about adulthood experiences in their personal statements. I'm not the only PS/DS editor who recommends this - I'm surprised at everyone else's surprise, truth be told! Writing about childhood/teen experiences makes a PS sound like an undergraduate admissions essay, let's say, 80% of the time - and why would any law school applicant want that? *shrug*

It's not a blanket recommendation, though - for example, I worked with an applicant who wrote about seeing the Berlin Wall fall as a child. That was a great and memorable topic and he turned it into an adult direction later in the essay, so it worked. And one guy did a Yale 250 about the unique "Common Law" that sprung up in his house after his parent's divorce that was humorous, original and heartfelt, and layered an adult concept over a childhood experience. So it can work - I'm just saying, childhood is often the easy way out, topic-wise - everyone has cute (or horrible) childhood stories. The worst are the "here's the first time I lied/called someone a liar/realized there was injustice in the world" essays - hundreds of those are written every year to law schools.

The best essays I've seen were about playing college rugby in England; fighting wild fires in Oregon; and, completing the Ironman in Hawaii. But I've also seen awesome essays about teaching abroad, and about commitments to service, and even to family. There was one fellow who went through medical school and then decided to do law, and his essay was considered and touching.

But I mean, obviously I'm not going to stop anyone from writing about childhood. Do it if you need to!

Best, Dani

And if you had no admirable accomplishments or achievements? What then?

Childhood stories, like any other approach, need to be well-written to have the desired affect. It's more about the overall quality of the essay and the writing when you're not dealing with a spectacular story of truly unique accomplishment.


Now will you stop signing your damn posts? We can see your wrote it and signing them makes you seem either stupid, old and out of touch, or just plain douchetastic.

Just stopped in to say hot thread title.