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anyone?

No.

It's corny.

I think it's really lacking the 'Personal' and has way too much of the 'Statement'.

There are quite a few threads on here that discuss and give amazing advice for the PS, just search around a bit.

I personally got no sense of who you are. I want to hear much more about what you had mentioned in the beginning regarding your history. The discussion about IP stuff really doesn't tell me anything about what differentiates you from the crowd. It's not very fun to read either.

I'd say focus on one of those aspects of your history and expand on it. Tell a story about your life. You mention that you are Iranian-Canadian, but what does that mean? How has that affected you growing up? How does that add to your personality? You're right that it just re-hashes your resume. But I personally would like to know more about the deeper aspects of those things you mentioned and how they affected you.

I hope this helps. I'm working on my PS for Stanford right now so PM me if you'd like to swap/want an example/would like to discuss more in-depth.

The first two paragraphs seem to imply something personal coming up and then it's a resume. It makes it seem like you are "using" the diversity and hardship stuff and not exploring it. Clearly you have interesting story/work experience so a better PS is hopefully not far away. Good luck

It is too long - it should at most two pages double-spaced. In the first part, I felt you did not provide enough information. You just can't throw out attempted kidnapping and not explain what happened.

It starts to get boring once you hit the third paragraph. The personal statement should not be a regurgitation of your resume. You don't need to talk about all these things (like what courses you took). I would dedicate a paragraph to your current work since it is related to why you want to go to law school, and expand on other aspects of your background. Focus more on making the personal statement an interesting and easy read.

thanks for the replies, appreciate the feedback!