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I think this is really excellent but I would elide the last two lines.

I think the first and last paragraphs do well in showing your personal dichotomy. The second and third feel forced and thrown in there. I think this essay is almost the opposite of one of your themes. It is four very nicely written paragraphs, that separately, are greater than their sum.

Too gimmicky, arty and self-indulgent. Too broad. You haven't actually picked a topic. You're right that it would be a terrible PS; it would be a terrible DS, too. You need something much more focused.

I would get rid of the second paragraph and the last two lines altogether. I would also stick to a more specific topic, it seems to be a bit all over the place. The first paragraph is a phenomenal start, go back and build from there. imo.