PS First Draft
Posted: Wed Mar 31, 2010 7:36 pm
Hey guys, here is my first draft. I would appreciate any criticism you might have. I haven't read the sticky for writing personal statements but I'm reading that now, so this is my first draft. To answer the obvious question before, it centers around my indictment for computer fraud and going to jail (deferred adjudication, no conviction, early termination 2 1/25 years later). Thank you!
From Rags to Riches
As I’m sitting there in the holding cell of the Harris County Jail, I can’t help but wonder where it all went wrong. No, this was not my first time in a holding cell. Months earlier, I was in the same situation in the state of Florida on a charge based on both my carelessness, and negligence. My 2nd time in a holding cell was this same place 2 months after the Florida incident, for this particular case. However, this time it was all different. This time I was guilty as charged, and I admitted to it. As part of a plea agreement, I was to spend 45 days in the county jail. As I put on my orange jumpsuit after 18 hours, I knew this would be my home for the next month and a half. What had happened?
There is nothing strange or unusual about my life, circumstances, or socioeconomic status, that would excuse my behavior in committing a crime. I came to America in 1990 with my parents, and two weeks later my dad had a job. Both of my parents are well educated engineers and every year we moved up the ladder. I had everything I could ever want in my life; friends, family, material goods, etc. In terms of my psychological condition, the only thing I had growing up was a mild case of A.D.D which increased in severity every year. By the time I was in high school, I became antisocial and mildly bipolar. As a result, I spent more and more time on the computer and the life I was living on the internet became my real life. When I began doing questionable things with a computer, I was well aware that they were wrong, yet this did not dissuade me from continuing various activities because I thought I wouldn’t get caught. That belief was eventually proven wrong in the form of an indictment, and court proceedings for 6 months. I held back nothing as I told the prosecution everything I had done, and I took responsibility for those acts. Because of my continued honesty and potential, they decided to spare me and give me a lenient sentence. This really my family up and the worst day of my life was the day I would begin serving my sentence. My dad stayed home and drove me to the jail. As we said our goodbyes, I couldn’t think of a worse feeling. I remember the last thing my dad told me before I walked inside of the building, “learn everything you can about the system because you’re in a privileged position.” I decided to take his advice and use this as a positive learning experience.
From the very first full day I was in the system, I could sense something wrong. It was all around me, yet I couldn’t put my finger on it. It was like coming home to an awkward smell; you know it’s there but you can’t describe it. It was when I went to court some 25 days later for a review of my community service supervision, that I noticed it. I have always loved this country and as a result, I know I was naïve and ignorant about things I wasn’t involved in. Now I was in a position to look at the reality of one of those things. As I was sitting on the cold floor and listening to defendants talking to their lawyers behind the glass door, I couldn’t believe my eyes. I could immediately tell who the high priced lawyers were, and who the public defenders were, not by charisma or style, but by attitude. Things that I considered myths turned out to be more true than I could imagine. For those that say you can’t buy a verdict, imagine being the guy on the other side of that window as a spectator. I was flabbergasted with the temerity and carelessness of the public defenders’ handling of the defendants’ cases, just so they could move the process along and earn their wages for that particular case, only to demonstrate the same ineptitude in the next case. Then I watched the defendants with the paid lawyers and the beauty of their tactics and overall attitude. I could tell how much smarter they were than the prosecutors in that court room, and that their clients would be going home soon on some technicality. Then and there, it became as clear as day, yet I couldn’t bring myself to say it. Our Judicial System was broken. And at that precise moment, I had the urge to be part of it, to help try and fix it to the best of my abilities. I also knew that if I was to have a chance at being part of this process, I would have to straighten my life out and be nearly perfect from this point on.
From that momentous day to the minute I was released, I watched all of my surroundings. I watched the treatment of the inmates, and saw many injustices, while the actions were justified in other situations. I watched the guards tease inmates without justification. I made a vow that when I became a lawyer, I would be fully aware of what goes on behind those walls, and I would have the power to either make changes, or be involved with someone that can . When I got out of jail, I made it my biggest priority to go to court as much as I could. I received the trial schedule from my felony court, and attended as many trials as I could. I took notes during the trials. I studied case law and historical constitutional law religiously. I somehow knew this was something that I not only wanted to do, but I was born to do. I taught myself the art of debate and logic, as those things eluded me throughout my entire life. The only negative aspect of my obsession came in the form of postponing my undergraduate studies to further my knowledge of the law. Logically, I knew I would have to complete undergraduate college to be able to attend law school. However, I was unable to attempt both, and so my undergraduate career became an extended undergraduate career.
My life completely changed on that special day where I had my epiphany. I bettered myself in many aspects and I became a different person. My self awareness increased as well as my intelligence. I’ve spent years dedicated to personal and character development so that one day I could stand in front of a judge, and defend my client with all the zeal and vigor a defense attorney should possess.
From Rags to Riches
As I’m sitting there in the holding cell of the Harris County Jail, I can’t help but wonder where it all went wrong. No, this was not my first time in a holding cell. Months earlier, I was in the same situation in the state of Florida on a charge based on both my carelessness, and negligence. My 2nd time in a holding cell was this same place 2 months after the Florida incident, for this particular case. However, this time it was all different. This time I was guilty as charged, and I admitted to it. As part of a plea agreement, I was to spend 45 days in the county jail. As I put on my orange jumpsuit after 18 hours, I knew this would be my home for the next month and a half. What had happened?
There is nothing strange or unusual about my life, circumstances, or socioeconomic status, that would excuse my behavior in committing a crime. I came to America in 1990 with my parents, and two weeks later my dad had a job. Both of my parents are well educated engineers and every year we moved up the ladder. I had everything I could ever want in my life; friends, family, material goods, etc. In terms of my psychological condition, the only thing I had growing up was a mild case of A.D.D which increased in severity every year. By the time I was in high school, I became antisocial and mildly bipolar. As a result, I spent more and more time on the computer and the life I was living on the internet became my real life. When I began doing questionable things with a computer, I was well aware that they were wrong, yet this did not dissuade me from continuing various activities because I thought I wouldn’t get caught. That belief was eventually proven wrong in the form of an indictment, and court proceedings for 6 months. I held back nothing as I told the prosecution everything I had done, and I took responsibility for those acts. Because of my continued honesty and potential, they decided to spare me and give me a lenient sentence. This really my family up and the worst day of my life was the day I would begin serving my sentence. My dad stayed home and drove me to the jail. As we said our goodbyes, I couldn’t think of a worse feeling. I remember the last thing my dad told me before I walked inside of the building, “learn everything you can about the system because you’re in a privileged position.” I decided to take his advice and use this as a positive learning experience.
From the very first full day I was in the system, I could sense something wrong. It was all around me, yet I couldn’t put my finger on it. It was like coming home to an awkward smell; you know it’s there but you can’t describe it. It was when I went to court some 25 days later for a review of my community service supervision, that I noticed it. I have always loved this country and as a result, I know I was naïve and ignorant about things I wasn’t involved in. Now I was in a position to look at the reality of one of those things. As I was sitting on the cold floor and listening to defendants talking to their lawyers behind the glass door, I couldn’t believe my eyes. I could immediately tell who the high priced lawyers were, and who the public defenders were, not by charisma or style, but by attitude. Things that I considered myths turned out to be more true than I could imagine. For those that say you can’t buy a verdict, imagine being the guy on the other side of that window as a spectator. I was flabbergasted with the temerity and carelessness of the public defenders’ handling of the defendants’ cases, just so they could move the process along and earn their wages for that particular case, only to demonstrate the same ineptitude in the next case. Then I watched the defendants with the paid lawyers and the beauty of their tactics and overall attitude. I could tell how much smarter they were than the prosecutors in that court room, and that their clients would be going home soon on some technicality. Then and there, it became as clear as day, yet I couldn’t bring myself to say it. Our Judicial System was broken. And at that precise moment, I had the urge to be part of it, to help try and fix it to the best of my abilities. I also knew that if I was to have a chance at being part of this process, I would have to straighten my life out and be nearly perfect from this point on.
From that momentous day to the minute I was released, I watched all of my surroundings. I watched the treatment of the inmates, and saw many injustices, while the actions were justified in other situations. I watched the guards tease inmates without justification. I made a vow that when I became a lawyer, I would be fully aware of what goes on behind those walls, and I would have the power to either make changes, or be involved with someone that can . When I got out of jail, I made it my biggest priority to go to court as much as I could. I received the trial schedule from my felony court, and attended as many trials as I could. I took notes during the trials. I studied case law and historical constitutional law religiously. I somehow knew this was something that I not only wanted to do, but I was born to do. I taught myself the art of debate and logic, as those things eluded me throughout my entire life. The only negative aspect of my obsession came in the form of postponing my undergraduate studies to further my knowledge of the law. Logically, I knew I would have to complete undergraduate college to be able to attend law school. However, I was unable to attempt both, and so my undergraduate career became an extended undergraduate career.
My life completely changed on that special day where I had my epiphany. I bettered myself in many aspects and I became a different person. My self awareness increased as well as my intelligence. I’ve spent years dedicated to personal and character development so that one day I could stand in front of a judge, and defend my client with all the zeal and vigor a defense attorney should possess.
You had me ready to write a serious response, til I got to "lawl skool." Well, you got me.