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Posted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 7:58 pm
by deevilsih
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Re: Drag Racing, Shoplifting, Criminal History Addendum, oh my!

Posted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 8:02 pm
by Kiersten1985
You're a drag racing female?? That's kind of badass. haha

I think it's good but the second part is better than the first - I would just add one more sentence to the end of the first part that sounds like your very last sentence. Something to do with regretting what you did, you stopped racing, understand that you put other people in danger, etc.

Re: Drag Racing, Shoplifting, Criminal History Addendum, oh my!

Posted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 8:13 pm
by deevilsih
It didn't feel so badass when I lost my license for a year!

How's this tacked on to the first paragraph:

... I regret that my actions could have harmed someone and afterwards was glad to leave racing where it belongs – on the track.

Re: Drag Racing, Shoplifting, Criminal History Addendum, oh my!

Posted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 8:16 pm
by charlesjd
holy crap lol. You might want to contact the bar about your past...

Re: Drag Racing, Shoplifting, Criminal History Addendum, oh my!

Posted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 8:18 pm
by amg0996
umm.. i wouldnt mention that it was for christmas presents, thats kind of sad. (it shows a lack of creativity and a material focus, one doesnt have a right to purchase christmas presents, if it was food or something that would be different.) perhaps more regret expressed, risk to others and so forth.... if i was in admissions i would like to hear what you have done lately in oder to make up for your misdeeds. like, volunteer, big sister, talk to people about how they should choose differently. i feel that if you made mistakes like these you should make some serious sacrifices to contribute to society. i think the biggest issue is two things not one and the fact that you stole but still had the means to drag race. oh... what are your numbers and where do you want to go.

p.s. i would loose the screen name deevilsih, perhaps its time to think differently

Re: Drag Racing, Shoplifting, Criminal History Addendum, oh my!

Posted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 10:45 pm
by daizee
Sorry, this is just hilarious!!!

Re: Drag Racing, Shoplifting, Criminal History Addendum, oh my!

Posted: Thu Jan 14, 2010 10:49 pm
by daizee
OK...Chuckles aside, perhaps start out with:
I am grateful for the wakeup call my arrest provided.

(As I first read this, sounded a bit more like bravado rather than repentance...)

In retrospect, I realize that regardless of my dire financial straits shoplifting Christmas presents was quite stupid; however, I am grateful for the wakeup call my arrest provided.

Re: Drag Racing, Shoplifting, Criminal History Addendum, oh my!

Posted: Fri Jan 15, 2010 12:42 am
by alohashoyu
I agree. Don't add in the Christmas present part. But I think you have a lot of potential to show how you've grown from these, add in how much you've turned your life since then!

Re: Drag Racing, Shoplifting, Criminal History Addendum, oh my!

Posted: Fri Jan 15, 2010 12:48 am
by jackster2
I'd admit you just for drag racing. I've spent 25 years in academia and it's rare to meet anyone with enough independence to break a few rules. But they never let me near an admissions committee.