"intense"- maybe. But "threat"? "harassment"? I don't think sharing the real name of someone on an internet message board where there is no presumption of anonymity can reasonably be construed as harassment. Nor do I think vamel saying s/he would do so is even a "threat"- what would be the perceived injury? I also think it's in poor taste to suggest s/he was "delusional" for sharing that s/he was offended by the remarks. vamel is clearly taking the "jokes" of earlier pages a lot more seriously than you all are, but if you are comfortable with what you've posted and stand behind it- who cares if someone announces your real name? If that makes you uncomfortable, I think it suggests you should've been a little more prudent and discerning in what you decided to post in the first place.greygoose wrote:wow, if this is true, this person is intense. sexist jokes and written threats are all forms of harassment. you would think someone who argued so fervently against these pictures would understand this.CaptainDirtyBird wrote:Hey did anyone else get a PM from vamel threatening to out them like this is the mercer thread or am I the only one?
Personally, if vamel is real, I have a lot of empathy. I have often been in settings where an arguably racist/sexist/whatever remark was made (often in jest and without malice), and I was too punk too speak up even though it made me exceedingly uncomfortable. I didn't want to isolate myself even further by interjecting to say that something was inappropriate or offensive, so I said nothing. I always feel horrible afterwards. True, we have to pick our battles, but every silence lulls our companions into a false sense of security that their remarks are ok. So when those awkward moments arise and I don't have the courage to pipe up, I'm often appreciative of a vamel-like person who chimes in just to say "hey, not cool guys".
Don't be confused by the lack of objection to the questionable comments/pictures; I am certain other long-time lurkers and even regular posters were displeased, but just scrolled on by before vamel spoke up. I just wouldn't want you to think that because no one else who frequently participates in the thread objected, that no one else was offended. A few of the most regular contributors who were conspicuously silent on this issue were folks who were very bothered but didn't want to make themselves an outcast by piping up. Law school is just high school all over again.
Nipplehead may have the best take: if your idea of a rockin' good time is incomplete without a good dose of well-meaning misogyny, then perhaps vamel is not who you want to party with. But in terms of our future classmates and colleagues, I welcome those who are bold enough to speak up when they perceive a wrong, especially those times when I wind up being the one looking awkwardly away in silence and wishing it'd could've been me who spoke up. And even when I'm not at all offended (like now)- it's good to be reminded to be sensitive to the perceptions of others. We can thank vamel for his/her input without chastising him/her for not sharing your sense of humor or appreciation of good-natured, but occasionally risque, ribbing. Right?
That said, I don't think the remarks or pictures were that big of a deal. I also think that since Courtenay says she reads these boards regularly, that alone would be enough for me to refrain from memorializing in a venue as public and permanent as the internet a statement I wouldn't want to be held accountable for later. There's no un-ringing a bell. Of vamel vs. the defender of the water cooler picture: who would feel more awkward if asked about their contribution to the thread over lunch with Courtenay? If neither, then it's all good.
If you wouldn't be embarrassed for the admissions office to see that, then you shouldn't waste a precious moment worrying about vamel "outing" you. We're all (mostly) grown folks here. If you think vamel should "get a life" or "lighten up", then the least you can do is be man/woman enough not to call foul when s/he says s/he's going to hold you accountable by attaching the author's name to the remarks you're so fervently explaining/ dismissing/ defending. Posting those photos (or laughing, or playing along with the banter...) doesn't make you a sexist- but it should make you prepared to anticipate that some of your classmates may object. That's fair, right?
Now back to Hemingway- about whom I am blissfully ignorant. So... hypothetically... *cough*... embarrassingly... if I'd never read a single word of Hemingway and I'd like to do so in the summer before law school, where should I start?