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Would you consider an acceptance at a school like Stanford as a bargaining chip in scholarship negotiation? It wouldn't be the only chip. Say the other is money at a peer school.

Basically I'm wondering if NYU would think that such an acceptance would be irrelevant, or worse, insulting, if brought up.

Why would they find that insulting? If you'd go to NYU over Stanford if they matched, they should take it as a huge compliment. (I don't know why you'd consider this though....Stanford has a great reputation nationwide.)

Sorry you have to be in such a difficult situation

I mean don't wave it in their face or be like well stanford blows NYU out of the water, but i don't think they would be insulted at all if you went about it tactfully