THE DING BAR

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ballcaps
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby ballcaps » Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:00 pm

Dipper wrote:
nosocat wrote:From looking at this thread, you would think that Berkeley is literally the only school that has rejected anyone from c/o 2018. I know we can do better. Come on, guys.


But hating on Berkeley is so fun....

Dear Berkeley,

The first time you waitlisted me (4th quartile, ouch), I thought we just needed more time to get to know each other. Maybe if I flashed a little more public interest work experience, really dove into that "non-dramatized" 4-page personal statement, you would see that I'm so much more than a pretty face and an LSAT above your 75th.

But then you waitlisted me, again. And I realized that it’s not me, Berkeley. It’s you. It’s you, with your drought-scorched wasteland of aging white hippies, your cost of living on par with NYC but absolutely nothing to show for it. Oh, another mediocre bar flooded with ugly tennis shoe and hoodie-wearing undergrads? Thanks, but I'll pass. You’re not as edgy as Oakland, not as cool as SF, and for a $4.50 latte I really expect better coffee art.

Berkeley, I'm sorry to break it to you, but you are the hipster douche of law schools, the white vegan Marxist with dreadlocks whose rapacious and self-righteous quinoa and almond milk consumption is starving Bolivian farmers and destroying California's wild salmon populations. You claim to be chock full of liberal social justice-y treehuggers, but in reality you have one black friend and those hippies you love so much still get their lawns manicured by the same underpaid migrant workers you purport to help in your clinics.

No thanks, Berkeley. I'll be sitting this one out.

xo,
Dipper


here we go!

whammy that was good!

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gilessanderson
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby gilessanderson » Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:10 pm

this is great. thought I'd switch up the tone..

Dear Berkeley,

Thank you for a wonderful undergrad experience and not stringing me along with a WL. Your population of edgy, bohemian homeless (by choice) youth and militant progressives who claim to celebrate the free speech movement but shun any political convictions they disagree with as insensitive hate speech provided me with endless entertainment (albeit a bit of frustration as well). You taught me the valuable lesson that uber-liberal douche's are even more laughable than hardcore evangelical conservatives. When I leave you for good and experience the freedom of once again using a plastic bag I'll know it's best for both of us that we're apart.

XOXO
GS

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gilessanderson
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby gilessanderson » Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:10 pm

Dipper wrote:
nosocat wrote:From looking at this thread, you would think that Berkeley is literally the only school that has rejected anyone from c/o 2018. I know we can do better. Come on, guys.


But hating on Berkeley is so fun....

Dear Berkeley,

The first time you waitlisted me (4th quartile, ouch), I thought we just needed more time to get to know each other. Maybe if I flashed a little more public interest work experience, really dove into that "non-dramatized" 4-page personal statement, you would see that I'm so much more than a pretty face and an LSAT above your 75th.

But then you waitlisted me, again. And I realized that it’s not me, Berkeley. It’s you. It’s you, with your drought-scorched wasteland of aging white hippies, your cost of living on par with NYC but absolutely nothing to show for it. Oh, another mediocre bar flooded with ugly tennis shoe and hoodie-wearing undergrads? Thanks, but I'll pass. You’re not as edgy as Oakland, not as cool as SF, and for a $4.50 latte I really expect better coffee art.

Berkeley, I'm sorry to break it to you, but you are the hipster douche of law schools, the white vegan Marxist with dreadlocks whose rapacious and self-righteous quinoa and almond milk consumption is starving Bolivian farmers and destroying California's wild salmon populations. You claim to be chock full of liberal social justice-y treehuggers, but in reality you have one black friend and those hippies you love so much still get their lawns manicured by the same underpaid migrant workers you purport to help in your clinics.

No thanks, Berkeley. I'll be sitting this one out.

xo,
Dipper


Bravo

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middlebear
Posts: 543
Joined: Wed May 14, 2014 4:48 pm

Re: THE DING BAR

Postby middlebear » Wed Mar 11, 2015 7:12 pm

Dear Yale,

Thank God, I applied because all the partners at work told me to and I felt like I "should". I knew going in that I didn't want to go, I was dreading the one-in-a-million chance that would see me accepted. I'd like to actually learn how to practice law, not your touchy feel theory bullshit. And frankly, I know a fair amount of YLS students, and I don't want to be their classmate.

Four years in undergrad was enough. Suck it, Mama Yale, I won't be back in New Haven till the reunion, and even that may be too soon.

Here's my middle finger,

middlebear

PS: Berkeley says hi. THEY love me, you ungrateful piece of stale, burned pizza crust.

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LawsRUs
Posts: 1970
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby LawsRUs » Wed Mar 11, 2015 8:38 pm

^^ alert! we have a berkeley lover
---
Dear Berkeley,

I forgot to comment on the location of your building. Do you think you are better than everybody else on campus because your building is on top of a hill? News for you: The undergrad business school sits higher than you.

Hope that burns,
With love,
LRU

Stillblade
Posts: 28
Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2015 12:51 am

Re: THE DING BAR

Postby Stillblade » Wed Mar 11, 2015 11:07 pm

The saltiness at Berkeley in this thread is really friggin good. Actually makes me glad I didn't apply. Good job!

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bou
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby bou » Thu Mar 12, 2015 12:06 am

Dear Berkeley,

You're gonna love this! So my wife wants to move from ny to cali. She doesnt like the cold ny, you see. So she made (and paid) for me to apply to you guys.

4page ps - what joy bestowed! I believe in the sister of talent, and you got a 2 pager. Alma Mater of my former psycho boss who got a job as s salesman upon graduation...in 1993.? Sign me up!
Don't apply at the end ? -Your website admonishes. Deadline it is!
No honey, we're not moving to north of lalaland and south of tru nutjob uber-liberals in orgegon. Bay area isnt that warm babe. You're stuck with whereever I want to go to my precious.

Thanks for assisting me Berkeley, for keeping the woman in her place beside me.
Ah, what sweet irony.

But seriously, hats off to you.

Farewell


...

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KMart
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby KMart » Thu Mar 12, 2015 12:08 am

LawsRUs wrote:I didn't apply to Berkeley, but I thought I would contribute:

Dear Berkeley,

Why didn’t you give me a fee waiver? Do you discriminate again poor people? I was going to apply (I really was), but your four page PS? Why do you torture us? But more importantly, why do you torture yourselves?

Love,
xoxo,
LRU

They give needs based fee waivers :wink:.

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LawsRUs
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby LawsRUs » Thu Mar 12, 2015 12:13 am

imKMart wrote:
LawsRUs wrote:I didn't apply to Berkeley, but I thought I would contribute:

Dear Berkeley,

Why didn’t you give me a fee waiver? Do you discriminate again poor people? I was going to apply (I really was), but your four page PS? Why do you torture us? But more importantly, why do you torture yourselves?

Love,
xoxo,
LRU

They give needs based fee waivers :wink:.


Dear Berkeley,

I asked you specifically for a need-based fee waiver! WTF!

eff you,
LRU

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KMart
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby KMart » Thu Mar 12, 2015 12:51 am

Berkeley is the 10 at the bar we all see until we realize she is too conceited and stuck up for our taste.

ub3r
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby ub3r » Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:23 am

imKMart wrote:Berkeley is the 10 at the bar we all see until we realize she is too conceited and stuck up for our taste.

The 10 who says they don't like dogs. Dealbreaker.

Username123
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Joined: Tue May 03, 2011 2:26 am

Re: THE DING BAR

Postby Username123 » Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:37 am

ub3r wrote:
imKMart wrote:Berkeley is the 10 at the bar we all see until we realize she is too conceited and stuck up for our taste.

The 10 who says they don't like dogs. Dealbreaker.


The 10 who smokes cigs.

#swipeleft

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LawsRUs
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby LawsRUs » Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:38 am

The 10 who has halitosis.

Username123
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Joined: Tue May 03, 2011 2:26 am

Re: THE DING BAR

Postby Username123 » Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:42 am

LawsRUs wrote:The 10 who has halitosis.


The 10 who doesn't know wtf halitosis is.

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KMart
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby KMart » Thu Mar 12, 2015 1:50 am

Sometimes it is better not to google.

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NoBladesNoBows
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby NoBladesNoBows » Thu Mar 12, 2015 11:49 am

.
Last edited by NoBladesNoBows on Wed Mar 18, 2015 3:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Hand
Posts: 3522
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby Hand » Thu Mar 12, 2015 11:54 am

Dipper wrote:
nosocat wrote:From looking at this thread, you would think that Berkeley is literally the only school that has rejected anyone from c/o 2018. I know we can do better. Come on, guys.


But hating on Berkeley is so fun....

Dear Berkeley,

The first time you waitlisted me (4th quartile, ouch), I thought we just needed more time to get to know each other. Maybe if I flashed a little more public interest work experience, really dove into that "non-dramatized" 4-page personal statement, you would see that I'm so much more than a pretty face and an LSAT above your 75th.

But then you waitlisted me, again. And I realized that it’s not me, Berkeley. It’s you. It’s you, with your drought-scorched wasteland of aging white hippies, your cost of living on par with NYC but absolutely nothing to show for it. Oh, another mediocre bar flooded with ugly tennis shoe and hoodie-wearing undergrads? Thanks, but I'll pass. You’re not as edgy as Oakland, not as cool as SF, and for a $4.50 latte I really expect better coffee art.

Berkeley, I'm sorry to break it to you, but you are the hipster douche of law schools, the white vegan Marxist with dreadlocks whose rapacious and self-righteous quinoa and almond milk consumption is starving Bolivian farmers and destroying California's wild salmon populations. You claim to be chock full of liberal social justice-y treehuggers, but in reality you have one black friend and those hippies you love so much still get their lawns manicured by the same underpaid migrant workers you purport to help in your clinics.

No thanks, Berkeley. I'll be sitting this one out.

xo,
Dipper


Beautiful, Dipper. Almost makes me grateful they waitlisted me.

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bou
Posts: 30
Joined: Sat Mar 07, 2015 7:50 am

Re: THE DING BAR

Postby bou » Thu Mar 12, 2015 12:16 pm

NoBladesNoBows wrote:
imKMart wrote:Berkeley is the 10 at the bar we all see until we realize she is too conceited and stuck up for our taste.


More like the 8 M I RITE???


out of 20

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ballcaps
Posts: 527
Joined: Tue Oct 14, 2014 12:20 pm

Re: THE DING BAR

Postby ballcaps » Thu Mar 12, 2015 8:12 pm

bou wrote:
NoBladesNoBows wrote:
imKMart wrote:Berkeley is the 10 at the bar we all see until we realize she is too conceited and stuck up for our taste.


More like the 8 M I RITE???


out of 20


got em!!

but srsly berkeley is no 10.

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LawsRUs
Posts: 1970
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby LawsRUs » Thu Mar 12, 2015 9:40 pm

sorry this is my last post hating on Berkeley:

Dear Berkeley,

Have you noticed that the alley behind your building smells like homeless men's piss? Why don't you clean that shit up before you go buy another case reporter for that library?

I really needed that fee waiver,
xoxo,
LRU

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kanthandleit
Posts: 47
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby kanthandleit » Fri Mar 13, 2015 9:18 am

TRIGGER WARNING








Sounds to me like Berkeley is the 10 that neckbeards always complain about being friendzoned by.

mgschiet
Posts: 91
Joined: Fri Oct 24, 2014 2:07 pm

Re: THE DING BAR

Postby mgschiet » Fri Mar 13, 2015 9:29 am

kanthandleit wrote:Sounds to me like Berkeley is the 10 that neckbeards always complain about being friendzoned by.


If a girl doesn't go for a neckbeard, she's not a 10.

nawi226
Posts: 64
Joined: Wed Oct 22, 2014 12:51 pm

Re: THE DING BAR

Postby nawi226 » Fri Mar 13, 2015 10:50 am

Dear Northwestern,

You had no interview dates available, and when I emailed you to inquire about this conundrum you said simply that interview dates MAY become available but that NOT COMPLETING AN INTERVIEW WILL IN NO WAY AFFECT MY APPLICATION. Faced with no choice, I completed my application without scheduling one. Within a couple short weeks I received your auto-ding, and have no choice but to suspect that you are simple scoundrels who are very ungentleman-like. I fart in your general direction, Northwestern, and I didn't want to go to your crappy midwestern city anyway.

Yours Truly,

Salty Forever, Esq

P.S. thanks for the fee waiver. I'm going to Cornell anyway.

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nosocat
Posts: 332
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Re: THE DING BAR

Postby nosocat » Fri Mar 13, 2015 10:59 am

:lol: Love it!

Stillblade
Posts: 28
Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2015 12:51 am

Re: THE DING BAR

Postby Stillblade » Fri Mar 13, 2015 4:07 pm

How inadvisable do you guys think it is it to spread salt in here about a waitlist? Do you think schools troll this thread to find people to ding off of the waitlist? Do you think prestigious law schools have a staff of elite hackers who specialize in identifying and tracking down applicants who badmouth them on the internet?




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