THE DING BAR Forum

[Dany]

I'll start: Berkeley. Ding date: 01/14/10

Umm, I don't want to listen to global warming propaganda for three years anyway. I eat red meat. Back off peta, your toyota prius is burning dead animals too. Earthquakes. Too liberal. Volatile economy. Hippies. Whatever.

[John_rizzy_rawls]

Oh Berkeley...

I understood why you rejected me when I came out of high school. Sure I wanted you, but I just had so much growing up to do. You were impressed when I applied as a transfer. You appreciated the steps I made towards becoming a greater person, but you still had your doubts. Now I know I've done everything in my power to impress you, but you still turned me down today. I don't know why and I probably never will. But I do know that I don't want to root for your wack-ass football team for three years. I don't want to get hassled by the homeless people that infect your campus for three years. I'm not trying to be that far away from a decent beach for three years. It's going to be awesome watching my Trojans woop that ass up and down every field, court, track, and pool we meet you guys on.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9QJIeW0GxNc

Love it.

[romanticegotist]

I would like to throw a general middle-finger wave to the like four distinct Harvard threads in here WE GET IT YOU'RE SMART PLEASE MOVE ON AND LEAVE US TO SUFFER IN PEACE.

[applemaroon]

.

[sonny]

Dear Berkeley,

You really didn't have to lead me on for sooooo long. You could have let me down four dates ago. I really don't judge. It doesn't matter to me that your a lesbian. No wonder Ruth Bader Ginsburg is the only one who talks to you anymore.

Best

[UselessKnowledge]

UT, thank you for rejecting me at 2am today. Couldn't help but not feel upset given the way you went about it.

[Azariel]

(First try at this!)

Hello, Berkeley.

Look at the boy you picked, now back to me, now back at your boy, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but he could have been if you had actually used some sense in your admission decisions. Look down, back up, what are those numbers again? Oh right, above both of your 75ths; nothing he can claim, I’m sure. What’s in your hand? Back at me. I have it, it’s my resume, chock full of liberal social justice-y activities that you usually love so much. Look again, my resume is now diamonds. Anything is possible when you choose a smart, beautiful, successful feminist lady and not a gun loving, misogynist lazy-ass redneck from the South.

But you didn’t, Berkeley. Look at your life, look at your choices, baby. 3 years of this boy? I know I made the same mistake, but you have no excuse – the haven of liberal PCness that you are, there’s got to be at least ONE sassy gay friend there to keep you from the fate of Juliet and Ophelia. Darling, you could do SO much better. You could have had me, baby. But I guess you realized that I could do better, too. That someone else has already accepted me with open arms, and that they’re just as liberal and fun as you, except better. Let’s face it, Berkeley. It’s not me, it’s you. You were afraid of rejection so you went with the low-hanging fruit. I’ve already made that same mistake and I can tell you it’s not worth it. But you’ll find out for yourself soon enough. It’s okay though, I’m too hot for you anyway.

Enjoy being the new woman. I’m on a horse.

[shntn]

Would read again.

[Dany]

Would read again.

[vpintz]

Would read again.

[finnandjake2]

American, despite your employment prospects I decided to throw an app your way because of your focus on PI.
I'm not even mad. It was never meant to be.
Thanks for the ding, you really helped me dodge a bullet.

Sincerely, Finnandjake2

[ChikaBoom]

Would read again.

[LaMuSayonga]

I lol'd. Good job.

[romanticegotist]

Minnesota,

You should just come out and say that you are doing everything in your power to keep your 167 median. I wouldn't have painstakingly crafted a unique PS for you if I had known that a spot on the waitlist was a total guarantee. Oh well, I'm in Austin now, and I might just have to stay, since the weather and the women are both hotter year-round.

R.E.

[nolongermissing]

Minnesota,

You should just come out and say that you are doing everything in your power to keep your 167 median. I wouldn't have painstakingly crafted a unique PS for you if I had known that a spot on the waitlist was a total guarantee. Oh well, I'm in Austin now, and I might just have to stay, since the weather and the women are hotter year-round.

R.E.

debatable

[countmein]

x

[somewhatwayward]

dear ucla, I'm glad you rejected because undoubtedly I would have slept with you. But as it turns out, I came out on top because I just found out you have herpes and genital warts. And just so it burns you real deep, I have found my true love!

BIOOOOCHHHH!!!!!!

wut?

[ht2988]

dear ucla, I'm glad you rejected because undoubtedly I would have slept with you. But as it turns out, I came out on top because I just found out you have herpes and genital warts. And just so it burns you real deep, I have found my true love!

BIOOOOCHHHH!!!!!!

are you for real?!

[romanticegotist]

Minnesota,

You should just come out and say that you are doing everything in your power to keep your 167 median. I wouldn't have painstakingly crafted a unique PS for you if I had known that a spot on the waitlist was a total guarantee. Oh well, I'm in Austin now, and I might just have to stay, since the weather and the women are hotter year-round.

R.E.

debatable

1) This is the Ding Bar, artistic license abounds; 2) Having now lived in both I'd say it's mostly a true statement. At the very least, it's mid-February and I can still see some leg/chest around here.

[shaker2016]

Hey UT,

Thanks for creepily sneaking into my inbox at 2am and leaving me that weakass ding email. How much longer you think you'll be able to hang in the top 20? You know someone is going to notice you're sitting there and kick you out right? I didn't want to live in hippy-filled, vegan friendly, People's Republic of Austin anyway. It's "weird" there. And no, that's not a good thing.

-Shaker

p.s. the longhorn is a dumb animal.

[mac35352]

Dear Berkeley,
I hate you and you suck and I thank you for the ding...and no, I'm not going to be mature about this....you are a big piece of %&$#! Why do you even lie at this point...why do you say that you "regret" rejecting me when you know it is not true? At least have the balls to tell me that my LSAT sucks and that my 3.92 GPA is not good enough for you. At least tell me that the decision was easy and that I should move on with my life far away from the bay area. Instead, you told me I should apply as a transfer. Are you out of your mind Berkeley? Why in the world would I do that when I already know you say it to every other rejected candidate? Why would you want me to feel special? like there might be some distant hope for me? People in TLS said your letter was nice.....I call BS on that. Your email sucks and you don't need to send me a hard copy. I would just burn it along with a copy of my application PDF, all the emails we exchanged, etc.
Go to hell you lying bastard.....
I am not done with you....I will hate you for a long time to come.
I wish you fall to #10 next year,
Mac (a very upset hispanic woman who is going to get stupidly drunk tonight).

Update: what the hell was I thinking? I was expecting the ding for a week. LOL.

[goden]

[boblawlob]

Hey Berkeley,

Thanks for crushing my dreams. I wish I could say mean things to you, but I can't. I'm not that kind of person. I will say this though: You will regret this decision because you rejected someone who has more promise and potential than anyone out there. I may not currently hold a PhD. I may not have had sex for money and then subsequently used myself as a "anti-prostitution" advocate. I may not have been a dumb kid and thought about selling drugs and was only saved when the supplier did not show up. But I am a motivated and smart person who has tried hard in the past and is still trying really hard in the present to further myself. You may think my flaw is that I never had learn a lesson from do anything shady and unethical, but I would say that THAT is my greatest strength: I NEVER allowed myself be in any unethical positions because I did the right thing always. In short, I may not have the greatest comeback or sob story, but I have always been running long and hard towards my goals. I think those who have never wavered from their path are better than those who have even if they came back strong because the former group had the decency to never let ever themselves falter. Thanks again for your consideration, but you'll regret that decision.

Regards,
Boblawlob

tl;dr

[Micdiddy]

Hey Berkeley,

Whatever.

[shntn]

Hey Berkeley,

Whatever.

Well fucking said.