Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

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bananapeanutbutter
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby bananapeanutbutter » Tue Apr 30, 2013 10:40 pm

Stockton_Malone wrote:
bananapeanutbutter wrote:
Stockton_Malone wrote:
TrialLawyer16 wrote:
None of us have actually met you, so we can't tell the severity of your "lack of social skills". We're just going off of your posts, which could be exagerrated due to cold feet.


Hey guys, I'd like to make it clear to everyone that I'm not exaggerating, and that I tried to present my difficulties as matter-of-fact as possible.

why don't you just ask a lot of questions? you may be overrating this. odds are your personality will be preferred to someone obviously phony given the relative intelligence of the people making these decisions. i can't relate to not wanting to look at people's faces when i talk to them but why don't you just practice it.


I look at a person's face when I'm talking to them, but I can't read it. It is incredibly hard for me to detect emotions or decipher what a person is thinking from facial expressions.

yeah, i can't relate to that but i don't get why it would influence you more in law than any other field. i also don't think you can be discriminated against for it, or that people would care if you just make that clear to them and ask them to just verbally communicate everything they have to tell you... not being afraid to ask them about what their look means if it's in a conversation and not creepily random.

NYstate
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby NYstate » Tue Apr 30, 2013 11:09 pm

Stockton_Malone wrote:
TrialLawyer16 wrote:
None of us have actually met you, so we can't tell the severity of your "lack of social skills". We're just going off of your posts, which could be exagerrated due to cold feet.


Hey guys, I'd like to make it clear to everyone that I'm not exaggerating, and that I tried to present my difficulties as matter-of-fact as possible.


I believe you. I don't think biglaw is for you. I don't know of any place where you might fit in. Everyone has to work with clients, even if thise clients are senior associates or partners. I really think you need to talk to career services in the schools you are considering. You have good acceptances right? Tell them upfront about your concern.

Are you super- smart, possible law savant?

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Stockton_Malone
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby Stockton_Malone » Tue Apr 30, 2013 11:15 pm

bananapeanutbutter wrote:
yeah, i can't relate to that but i don't get why it would influence you more in law than any other field. i also don't think you can be discriminated against for it, or that people would care if you just make that clear to them and ask them to just verbally communicate everything they have to tell you... not being afraid to ask them about what their look means if it's in a conversation and not creepily random.


It bothers me because to my understanding law requires more social skills than other professions. I know that you can't be legally discriminated against, but I'm worried that my lack of social skills (which largely I can't get around) will prevent me from being hired or form thriving in a corporate law environment. Also, I think revealing that I have Aspberger's to employers and coworkers is not very wise - not only will this give them a reason to unnecessarily judge and scrutinize me, they can use this knowledge to exploit me. Revealing that I have Aspberger's is basically like revealing that I have a lack of social awareness and can be deceived easily.

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Stockton_Malone
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby Stockton_Malone » Tue Apr 30, 2013 11:28 pm

NYstate wrote:
Stockton_Malone wrote:
TrialLawyer16 wrote:
None of us have actually met you, so we can't tell the severity of your "lack of social skills". We're just going off of your posts, which could be exagerrated due to cold feet.


Hey guys, I'd like to make it clear to everyone that I'm not exaggerating, and that I tried to present my difficulties as matter-of-fact as possible.


I believe you. I don't think biglaw is for you. I don't know of any place where you might fit in. Everyone has to work with clients, even if thise clients are senior associates or partners. I really think you need to talk to career services in the schools you are considering. You have good acceptances right? Tell them upfront about your concern.

Are you super- smart, possible law savant?


I'm not a savant, lol. I would say I'm smart though.

I think I should also add that while I have little social skills and have difficulties reading and interacting with others, I am not a social idiot. Generally I like to keep to myself and avoid bothering others to prevent any potential social gaffes or uncomfortable situations.

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SemperLegal
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby SemperLegal » Wed May 01, 2013 12:12 am

Stockton_Malone wrote:
NYstate wrote:
Stockton_Malone wrote:
TrialLawyer16 wrote:
None of us have actually met you, so we can't tell the severity of your "lack of social skills". We're just going off of your posts, which could be exagerrated due to cold feet.


Hey guys, I'd like to make it clear to everyone that I'm not exaggerating, and that I tried to present my difficulties as matter-of-fact as possible.


I believe you. I don't think biglaw is for you. I don't know of any place where you might fit in. Everyone has to work with clients, even if thise clients are senior associates or partners. I really think you need to talk to career services in the schools you are considering. You have good acceptances right? Tell them upfront about your concern.

Are you super- smart, possible law savant?


I'm not a savant, lol. I would say I'm smart though.

I think I should also add that while I have little social skills and have difficulties reading and interacting with others, I am not a social idiot. Generally I like to keep to myself and avoid bothering others to prevent any potential social gaffes or uncomfortable situations.


I think you will be fine. Interviews are going to be hell for you, and I am sure that you will under-perform your numbers a good deal. However, with a luck, a lot of practice, and a very extensive "script" I think you will still be hireable. There are plenty of chances for mock interviews so that you are not caught off guard.

In my experience, a certain subset of people with Asperger's tend to perform well in academic settings, not because they are "savants" but because they have less distractions, have already formed good study habits, are able to replicate the thought processes of others (in this case, professors or judges), and don't have a problem asking questions when they are confused.

I think that in the long run, law is one of the best fields for you. Medicine is truly collaborative and requires patient interaction, introverted engineers tend to be exploited or professionally stagnate. Lawyers, on the other hand, are expected to be a little weird, get paid to preplan, and get operate quite well solely on paper.

Good luck, shorty.

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TheBiggerMediocre
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby TheBiggerMediocre » Sat May 04, 2013 11:28 pm

I am good at everything I have chosen law because law because it allows me to profit off other peoples suffering.

I was told multiple times that medicine and engineering would not be good choices because it would be unethical to put peoples lives in my unforgiving hands.

bananapeanutbutter
Posts: 351
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby bananapeanutbutter » Sat May 04, 2013 11:46 pm

Stockton_Malone wrote:
bananapeanutbutter wrote:
yeah, i can't relate to that but i don't get why it would influence you more in law than any other field. i also don't think you can be discriminated against for it, or that people would care if you just make that clear to them and ask them to just verbally communicate everything they have to tell you... not being afraid to ask them about what their look means if it's in a conversation and not creepily random.


It bothers me because to my understanding law requires more social skills than other professions. I know that you can't be legally discriminated against, but I'm worried that my lack of social skills (which largely I can't get around) will prevent me from being hired or form thriving in a corporate law environment. Also, I think revealing that I have Aspberger's to employers and coworkers is not very wise - not only will this give them a reason to unnecessarily judge and scrutinize me, they can use this knowledge to exploit me. Revealing that I have Aspberger's is basically like revealing that I have a lack of social awareness and can be deceived easily.

Eh, I don't really know what firms have to gain by deceiving you unless you have clients. Honestly, I'd think you should just hide it from lawyers at other firms, because I don't believe it violates any law for another lawyer to exploit it in representing his client.

I also don't know what the law is regarding this. I would absolutely tell your coworkers once hired, because people might assume you don't care about them if you just seem disinterested. I personally wouldn't care as long as you were trustworthy, knew sports and didn't give me extra work, but some people are sensitive. This seems like a great excuse to not have to be shown baby pictures.

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CO2016YEAH
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby CO2016YEAH » Sat May 04, 2013 11:58 pm

Hi OP,

I don't know what it's like to have Asperger's, and neither do I know if I've interacted with someone who does and how that experience would have went.

However, I've heard that it if you can deliver on 2 out of 3 of the following counts people will most likely continue to put up with you.

1. Do good work.
2. Always be on time.
3. Be a nice person.

This is from a book I was told about, and I don't remember the name and author. If someone recognized it please fill me in.

The gist is that if you are a nice guy and do good work then people will put up with you being late sometimes. If you are always on time are a nice guy people are likely to put up with your half-assed performance. If you are socially somewhat of a pain in the ass to be around but you do good work and are always on time then people will generally put up with you.

In addition, people's ability to interact with you is as much a testament to their social skills as it is to yours. As I said, I don't know what it's like to interact with you in person, but you seem civil and intelligent enough to be able to communicate effectively. Limited sensitivity to subtleties and a reduced emotional perception might even be advantageous in ways in law that it definitely wouldn't be in medicine, as it has been said, where there is a necessity for empathy. You might not do well in a court room working a jury, or even networking social and business events; however, your more hardened personality and intent work ethic should carry you the distance in a lot of other ways.

I say go for it.

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TheBiggerMediocre
Posts: 121
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby TheBiggerMediocre » Mon May 06, 2013 9:03 pm

CO2016YEAH wrote:Hi OP,

I don't know what it's like to have Asperger's, and neither do I know if I've interacted with someone who does and how that experience would have went.

However, I've heard that it if you can deliver on 2 out of 3 of the following counts people will most likely continue to put up with you.

1. Do good work.
2. Always be on time.
3. Be a nice person.

This is from a book I was told about, and I don't remember the name and author. If someone recognized it please fill me in.

The gist is that if you are a nice guy and do good work then people will put up with you being late sometimes. If you are always on time are a nice guy people are likely to put up with your half-assed performance. If you are socially somewhat of a pain in the ass to be around but you do good work and are always on time then people will generally put up with you.

In addition, people's ability to interact with you is as much a testament to their social skills as it is to yours. As I said, I don't know what it's like to interact with you in person, but you seem civil and intelligent enough to be able to communicate effectively. Limited sensitivity to subtleties and a reduced emotional perception might even be advantageous in ways in law that it definitely wouldn't be in medicine, as it has been said, where there is a necessity for empathy. You might not do well in a court room working a jury, or even networking social and business events; however, your more hardened personality and intent work ethic should carry you the distance in a lot of other ways.

I say go for it.


I concur but please choose some really boring part of the law that other people wouldn't able to put up with, since then you will truly shine

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jbagelboy
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby jbagelboy » Tue May 07, 2013 5:44 am

Ive known several people with aspergers. Please do not take what I say to be insensitive, some of these individuals have been my friends.

First, as has been noted, tons of students at top law schools will be awkward. I met awkward kids at asw and was like aight.. networking in this environment will be easier than I thought. I work at a management consulting firm right now -- THAT you could not do without people skills.

Second, for interviews, take a shitload of vivance so you can concentrate, practice, and you'll be fine. If you are articulate, have numbers to back it up, and target the right insular legal work you'll be fine.

Lastly, you will meet people who will like youfor what you have to offer. Dont overengage your classmates -- coming off as trying too hard is social miscue #1 -- but you will have to make connections since the people in your graduating class will be peers throughout your career.

Also get high once in a while and you'll feel better about social anxiety. For real.

Either way definitely go to law school. Your a smart kid and you deserve the same shot.

BlueDiamond
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Re: Asperger's, URM, short, T6: Should I pursue law?

Postby BlueDiamond » Tue May 07, 2013 6:18 am

Jerry Espenson did it.. so OP can too




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