Making Friends in 1L

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brownpride
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Making Friends in 1L

Postby brownpride » Fri Jan 11, 2013 11:14 am

I know this sounds like a stupid question, but I'd appreciate advice. I've joined the Facebook group for my school's incoming 1L class, and even from now a lot of people living in major cities are already meeting up and making friends. Combining that with the fact that many people at my school will have gone to the same undergrads, I feel that a lot of people might already have friends come September while I'll know nobody. I also won't be able to make it to ASW because I'm living overseas for the year. I'm not socially awkward, but making friends is already hard for me as it is since I'm a less social and not a very exciting person, but I'm wondering if anyone has any tips for making good friends at the beginning of 1L.

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TripTrip
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby TripTrip » Fri Jan 11, 2013 11:16 am

Step 1: Talk to people.

llachans
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby llachans » Fri Jan 11, 2013 11:20 am

Just talk to people at orientation before classes begin. It's likely that everyone will go out to the bars before school starts too. Just join them. You'll be fine. They're as willing to make new friends as you are.

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20130312
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby 20130312 » Fri Jan 11, 2013 11:26 am

You'll be sitting in a room with these people for four hours a day, four (or five at some schools) days a week. It will be hard NOT to talk to them (which, trust me, will be its own problem once finals are only a month away and people start flipping out).

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Br3v
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby Br3v » Fri Jan 11, 2013 11:42 am

Most schools split up the class into smaller sections and then there are events to bring everyone closer together. You will be fine.

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North
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby North » Fri Jan 11, 2013 12:56 pm

I was just worrying about this the other day. Socially derpy FTW.

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20130312
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby 20130312 » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:22 pm

Even if you actively try to avoid making friends in law school, you will still end up with a couple. Just the nature of being in the trenches with people day in and day out.

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bk1
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby bk1 » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:23 pm

TripTrip wrote:Step 1: Talk to people.

And here I always thought step 1 was to cut a hole in the box.

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TripTrip
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby TripTrip » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:23 pm

bk1 wrote:
TripTrip wrote:Step 1: Talk to people.

And here I always thought step 1 was to cut a hole in the box.

Either or would probably work for OP.

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Icculus
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby Icculus » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:26 pm

bk1 wrote:
TripTrip wrote:Step 1: Talk to people.

And here I always thought step 1 was to cut a hole in the box.


This is how I became popular, Justin Timberlake FTW.

Seriously though, just talk to people and be normal...it's not rocket science.

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Br3v
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby Br3v » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:28 pm

Personally I'm more worried about my SO. While ill have a structured environment to meet people in law school, she won't and will have to rely on meeting cool ppl at work I guess.

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bk1
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby bk1 » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:32 pm

Br3v wrote:Personally I'm more worried about my SO. While ill have a structured environment to meet people in law school, she won't and will have to rely on meeting cool ppl at work I guess.

You know you can meet people while going out and doing things, right? Admittedly it is much harder than having a structured environment but relying on a workplace to find friends blows.

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2014
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby 2014 » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:33 pm

It's a non-issue. Some people will come in with friends, others will come in with "friends" (I.e. met on FB, turns out they don't actually like each other), and most will come in knowing no one.

At least early on your class will largely be sociable and you will make friends in DROVES. Unless you suck obviously, but then nothing we say will really save you.

E-

Br3v wrote:Personally I'm more worried about my SO. While ill have a structured environment to meet people in law school, she won't and will have to rely on meeting cool ppl at work I guess.


This has always scared me. I have plenty of friends from school and stuff, but on the off chance I end up in a secondary market without even acquaintances, the process of meeting people from scratch is daunting.

fluffybunny
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby fluffybunny » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:39 pm

You'll make friends fine. Like others have said, you'll be spending so much time together that you'd actually have to try to not make any friends.

Your SO is a different issue. Maybe you'll get lucky and your SO will fit in with your law school crowd. In my experience, wives and girlfriends do better with their SO's law school buddies than husbands and boyfriends do. I'm not totally sure why or if others have noticed this pattern.

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Br3v
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby Br3v » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:39 pm

bk1 wrote:
Br3v wrote:Personally I'm more worried about my SO. While ill have a structured environment to meet people in law school, she won't and will have to rely on meeting cool ppl at work I guess.

You know you can meet people while going out and doing things, right? Admittedly it is much harder than having a structured environment but relying on a workplace to find friends blows.


Like what stuff? I don't live in a afternoon made for TV movie. I don't like belong to a rock climbing club or read "new in the city?" flyers on the Starbucs community board. The only thing I would know to do is meet people at a bar.

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rinkrat19
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby rinkrat19 » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:41 pm

Seek out other coupled students. Our school has a student org for significant others (called "Co-Counsel") and they have events.

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Br3v
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby Br3v » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:43 pm

rinkrat19 wrote:Seek out other coupled students. Our school has a student org for significant others (called "Co-Counsel") and they have events.


Yeah I figured something like this existed but didn't know if it was primarily for married students.

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DocHawkeye
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby DocHawkeye » Fri Jan 11, 2013 1:53 pm

Br3v wrote:
bk1 wrote:
Br3v wrote:Personally I'm more worried about my SO. While ill have a structured environment to meet people in law school, she won't and will have to rely on meeting cool ppl at work I guess.

You know you can meet people while going out and doing things, right? Admittedly it is much harder than having a structured environment but relying on a workplace to find friends blows.


Like what stuff? I don't live in a afternoon made for TV movie. I don't like belong to a rock climbing club or read "new in the city?" flyers on the Starbucs community board. The only thing I would know to do is meet people at a bar.


My wife really struggled with this since we're married, have kids, are older than average law students, and live a long way from campus (roughly 50 miles). As a result, most of our social lives are separate from the law school social scene. We have a couple of close friends from the law school, but her social life focuses mainly on groups through our church (a young adult group, a moms with pre-school children group, and etc.). She also socializes with people from her work. I, n the other hand, have almost no social life: take the kids to school, go to school/work, pick the kids up from school, study, collapse into bed at night, lather, rinse, repeat.

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bk1
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby bk1 » Fri Jan 11, 2013 2:13 pm

Br3v wrote:Like what stuff? I don't live in a afternoon made for TV movie. I don't like belong to a rock climbing club or read "new in the city?" flyers on the Starbucs community board. The only thing I would know to do is meet people at a bar.

It's not easy and it requires work. Find other people doing things that you and/or your SO like to do. Whether that's religion (like Doc above), cooking classes (which my gf and I have done), athletics (sports leagues, etc), or other things. The internet, as always, is a helpful tool.

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nygrrrl
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby nygrrrl » Fri Jan 11, 2013 2:23 pm

bk1 wrote:
TripTrip wrote:Step 1: Talk to people.

And here I always thought step 1 was to cut a hole in the box.

:lol:

Seriously though, in addition to all of the suggestions above, your school will probably have various clubs and groups and you should definitely join at least one. Some of my closest friends in law school are the people I met on my competition team, other people find their niche on a journal. There are social outreach groups, specialty groups (Sports Law Forum, Irish Law Students, etc) all of which provide an ice breaker into the social scene.

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DocHawkeye
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby DocHawkeye » Fri Jan 11, 2013 2:27 pm

nygrrrl wrote:
bk1 wrote:
TripTrip wrote:Step 1: Talk to people.

And here I always thought step 1 was to cut a hole in the box.

:lol:

Seriously though, in addition to all of the suggestions above, your school will probably have various clubs and groups and you should definitely join at least one. Some of my closest friends in law school are the people I met on my competition team, other people find their niche on a journal. There are social outreach groups, specialty groups (Sports Law Forum, Irish Law Students, etc) all of which provide an ice breaker into the social scene.


Competitions are a great was to meet people. They tend to have a lot of down time while people feel a degree of stress which seems to encourage small talk. Win or lose, you feel like you shared a little of unique experience with people on your team and other teams.

Lord Randolph McDuff
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby Lord Randolph McDuff » Fri Jan 11, 2013 2:36 pm

fluffybunny wrote:You'll make friends fine. Like others have said, you'll be spending so much time together that you'd actually have to try to not make any friends.

Your SO is a different issue. Maybe you'll get lucky and your SO will fit in with your law school crowd. In my experience, wives and girlfriends do better with their SO's law school buddies than husbands and boyfriends do. I'm not totally sure why or if others have noticed this pattern.


I have completely notice this. Why is this true? Bring your wife and everyone goes out of there way to be nice to her and make her feel welcomed, bring your husband and have to baby sit him all night.. This doesn't make any sense to me though, so maybe we are both in rando situations.

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TripTrip
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby TripTrip » Fri Jan 11, 2013 2:41 pm

Lord Randolph McDuff wrote:
fluffybunny wrote:You'll make friends fine. Like others have said, you'll be spending so much time together that you'd actually have to try to not make any friends.

Your SO is a different issue. Maybe you'll get lucky and your SO will fit in with your law school crowd. In my experience, wives and girlfriends do better with their SO's law school buddies than husbands and boyfriends do. I'm not totally sure why or if others have noticed this pattern.


I have completely notice this. Why is this true? Bring your wife and everyone goes out of there way to be nice to her and make her feel welcomed, bring your husband and have to baby sit him all night.. This doesn't make any sense to me though, so maybe we are both in rando situations.

This makes sense to me intuitively, but not in any way I care to explain.

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20130312
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby 20130312 » Fri Jan 11, 2013 2:44 pm

TripTrip wrote:
Lord Randolph McDuff wrote:
fluffybunny wrote:You'll make friends fine. Like others have said, you'll be spending so much time together that you'd actually have to try to not make any friends.

Your SO is a different issue. Maybe you'll get lucky and your SO will fit in with your law school crowd. In my experience, wives and girlfriends do better with their SO's law school buddies than husbands and boyfriends do. I'm not totally sure why or if others have noticed this pattern.


I have completely notice this. Why is this true? Bring your wife and everyone goes out of there way to be nice to her and make her feel welcomed, bring your husband and have to baby sit him all night.. This doesn't make any sense to me though, so maybe we are both in rando situations.

This makes sense to me intuitively, but not in any way I care to explain.

Thanks for your contribution.

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TripTrip
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Re: Making Friends in 1L

Postby TripTrip » Fri Jan 11, 2013 2:45 pm

Glad I could be of service.




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