To stay or not to stay in this relationship

(Please Ask Questions and Answer Questions)

Should I stay in this relationship?

Break-up!
152
93%
Stay in the relationship and make it work you douche!
11
7%
 
Total votes: 163

tobeornottobe
Posts: 9
Joined: Wed Jun 22, 2011 4:34 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby tobeornottobe » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:17 pm

Thirteen wrote:
tobeornottobe wrote:I do need new fucking friends as well. Lesson from this relationship seems to be not to date within friend circle. Okay, I am not Brad Pitt, but I would give myself a 7 or 8/10 on looks. Let's put it this way, many more attractive girls than my girlfriend have told me they wished I were single.
The thing is I do care about my girlfriend, but I cannot look beyond this "looks" thing for now. Also, guys be wary of girls with a ton of make-up. Before deciding to be in a relationship, have the girl wash her face for you. I feel like there are a lot more girls like my girl-friend who look like a dime with make-up, but end up looking like Kelly Osbourne without make-up. Where are all the girls with natural beauty?!!?


They're in law school.


I sure hope so if I decide to end this relationship. It would be a shame if I break-up with my girlfriend only to find more of the same in law school.

User avatar
fatduck
Posts: 4186
Joined: Mon Sep 13, 2010 10:16 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby fatduck » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:18 pm

tobeornottobe wrote:
Thirteen wrote:
tobeornottobe wrote:I do need new fucking friends as well. Lesson from this relationship seems to be not to date within friend circle. Okay, I am not Brad Pitt, but I would give myself a 7 or 8/10 on looks. Let's put it this way, many more attractive girls than my girlfriend have told me they wished I were single.
The thing is I do care about my girlfriend, but I cannot look beyond this "looks" thing for now. Also, guys be wary of girls with a ton of make-up. Before deciding to be in a relationship, have the girl wash her face for you. I feel like there are a lot more girls like my girl-friend who look like a dime with make-up, but end up looking like Kelly Osbourne without make-up. Where are all the girls with natural beauty?!!?


They're in law school.


I sure hope so if I decide to end this relationship. It would be a shame if I break-up with my girlfriend only to find more of the same in law school.

she's probably cheating on you, anyway.

sidhesadie
Posts: 454
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2010 4:54 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby sidhesadie » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:19 pm

break up. you aren't doing her any favors. you can date someone prettier and she can date someone with integrity. It'll work out for both of you.
(note: the lack of integrity isn't that he isn't attracted to her, it's that he's continued to date her for 3 years, and is contemplating letting HER make the major life decision to move in w HIM for law school when he knows he isn't attracted to her, and is already setting up his future excuses for cheating in his mind. Just end it already. Be a grown up. )

User avatar
Bill Cosby
Posts: 331
Joined: Sat Feb 20, 2010 2:56 am

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby Bill Cosby » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:22 pm

kaiser wrote:People will obviously chime in and call you superficial, but that won't answer your question. If you honestly aren't attracted to the girl, then why force yourself to stay with her? A relationship isn't solely about emotional connection. I think it would be very hasty of her to move with you to law school and hinder your ability to really grow and develop as a person while forming a new group of contacts, friends, etc. Perhaps you can give the "long distance" thing a try. That way, things will likely fizzle out on their own without any need for you to play the bad guy. You don't sound like you care all that much about this girl, and that is fine. You shouldn't feel guilty about it.


I wouldn't say wanting to move in together is hasty, considering they've been together for three years.

Omega10
Posts: 100
Joined: Tue Mar 15, 2011 10:58 am

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby Omega10 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:23 pm

bjsesq wrote:If you have to ask, leave. Also: you clearly don't give a shit about her.

This. You don't strike me as being mature enough for any relationship, actually. Good luck to you.

User avatar
Kilpatrick
Posts: 1073
Joined: Sun Dec 06, 2009 2:06 am

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby Kilpatrick » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:25 pm

Show her this thread and she'll make things easier for you and dump you.

socraticmethodman
Posts: 315
Joined: Wed Nov 10, 2010 3:35 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby socraticmethodman » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:26 pm

op is a funny dude lol.

071816
Posts: 5511
Joined: Thu Mar 31, 2011 8:06 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby 071816 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:26 pm

lol @ the makeup thing. That sucks mang. Bite the bullet and end it.

09042014
Posts: 18282
Joined: Wed Oct 14, 2009 10:47 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby 09042014 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:28 pm

Make sure when you dump her, that you let her know it's because she gained weight.

User avatar
Rooney
Posts: 1179
Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 3:43 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby Rooney » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:29 pm

Desert Fox wrote:Make sure when you dump her, that you let her know it's because she gained weight.


And false advertising

User avatar
tyro
Posts: 648
Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2011 2:23 am

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby tyro » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:34 pm

tobeornottobe wrote:I love her


Are you sure? It sounds like you don't really care about her.

bmore
Posts: 302
Joined: Thu Nov 04, 2010 12:28 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby bmore » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:37 pm

WOW!!! How old are you guys? Who wears that much makeup? And if they did, couldn't you tell? So maybe you are attracted to painted ladies. Do her a favor and break-up. If you love her, she can't be all that bad. Maybe she will find someone who is more attracted to her than her make-up.

bartleby
Posts: 1315
Joined: Thu May 29, 2008 3:23 am

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby bartleby » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:38 pm

as obvious as the answers seems to be and as macho as op appears to me, op should consider some other stuff.

1. why has op been going out with this girl for 3 years? there has to be some other stuff here whether it is that he is insecure or too emotionally attached/invested

2. going back to being emotionally attached, op said he was in love with her (at one point - whatever that means) despite how ugly and fat she has gotten

since u are already being pretty cold, i say dump her after first semester or 1L. how will you react if you hear about her getting nailed by two dudes during the first few weeks in law school? did you live with her? what if you miss her? 3 years is no joke.

InLikeFlint
Posts: 132
Joined: Sat Oct 23, 2010 6:58 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby InLikeFlint » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:38 pm

IAFG wrote:
tobeornottobe wrote: I keep picturing myself dating more attractive girls.

I bet they aren't.


IAFG chimes in in every single hooking up/relationship thread to rip on anonymous male posters. Why?

Z3RO
Posts: 526
Joined: Thu Sep 03, 2009 11:57 am

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby Z3RO » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:43 pm

If you want to be the biggest coward possible, you could continue to string her along, then never spend any time at all with her once law school starts, claiming innocent studying. She'll either get a shred of self respect and dump you or make you feel so guilty about it that you end up marrying the broad. Then you can just biglaw cheat on her the rest of your life without ever mentioning the whole weight thing. 8)

User avatar
Thirteen
Posts: 23949
Joined: Mon Dec 07, 2009 4:53 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby Thirteen » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:45 pm

InLikeFlint wrote:
IAFG wrote:
tobeornottobe wrote: I keep picturing myself dating more attractive girls.

I bet they aren't.


IAFG chimes in in every single hooking up/relationship thread to rip on anonymous male posters. Why?


She's worse on females, bro.

User avatar
albusdumbledore
Posts: 1132
Joined: Thu Nov 05, 2009 4:38 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby albusdumbledore » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:49 pm

tobeornottobe wrote:Okay, I know this is pathetic that I am asking on this forum, but I cannot ask any of my friends because they are mutual friends of my girlfriend as well. Here is what you need to know. I will be starting law school this fall. I have been with my current girlfriend for about 3 years, but I am starting to feel like this relationship might not work. I will make a few points and you guys can let me know if I should break it off or not.
1. She is a bit needy and wants to move with me to law school. I initially liked the idea, but I am starting to realize that this might stop me from creating as big of a social network as I want to make in law school.
2. When I first met my girlfriend, I saw her with make-up on and thought she was very attractive. During all our dates, she wore make up. The first time I saw her without make-up was when we actually became a legitimate couple. The difference between her with make-up and without make-up is like night and day. I was shocked, but decided that I love her, so I stuck with the relationship.
3. I love working out and like playing sports. My girlfriend does not! I thought I could remedy this, but it doesn't seem to be working. She has gained weight and does not seem to want to lose it. I, on the other hand, am in pretty good shape and workout a lot.
4. As much as I hate it, I keep picturing myself dating more attractive girls. I keep wondering all the good stuff that I am missing out on. I am pretty sure I can do a lot better, but I have got so used to this damn relationship. I feel like, I wouldn't know how to go about without her.

What the hell should I do? Stay or break up before law school?


Read as:

1. I want to bang other girls in law school.
2. The first time I really looked at her was the morning after.
3. She's getting fatter.
4. I consider myself better looking than her.

User avatar
bk1
Posts: 18424
Joined: Sun Mar 14, 2010 7:06 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby bk1 » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:54 pm

Suggestion 1: Dump her.

Suggestion 2: If you have to turn to the internet for this kind of shit you need to be less aspie and make some friends that are actually your friends.

splitmuch
Posts: 968
Joined: Sat Feb 19, 2011 2:27 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby splitmuch » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:54 pm

tobeornottobe wrote:2. When I first met my girlfriend, I saw her with make-up on and thought she was very attractive. During all our dates, she wore make up. The first time I saw her without make-up was when we actually became a legitimate couple. The difference between her with make-up and without make-up is like night and day. I was shocked, but decided that I love her, so I stuck with the relationship.


Anyone else read this as she made OP agree to be a "couple" in order to bang?

BeenDidThat
Posts: 704
Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 12:18 am

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby BeenDidThat » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:54 pm

This is stupid. You don't really like her. You're pity dating her at this point.

tobeornottobe
Posts: 9
Joined: Wed Jun 22, 2011 4:34 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby tobeornottobe » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:55 pm

May be I am too immature for a serious relationship. We have got into fights about her not wanting to go to the gym with me or play tennis with me. She used to be a great athlete in high school, but she doesn't seem to want to do much physical stuff anymore. I know I am an ass for stringing her along. I have lived with her for the past two years. That's why I find it hard to leave the relationship. I mean, we broke up 4 times, but I got back every time because she balled her ass off and I could not find it in me to break her heart. She told me she would never have lost her virginity to me had she known I would break up with her. I told myself that I can try to work it out, but things seem to be getting worse. I moved to another city for her leaving all my good friends behind. As of now, I hardly have any good friends in this city because I am with her all the time. For law school, I am deciding between a law school in Washington or a law school in northern california. I almost want to move to Washington just so I can forget this old life in CA and start over in a new state. All my good friends are in northern california though, but we have grown apart because I have been away for a pretty long time. My situation is pretty sad. I am hoping law school can remedy this mess of a life I have made for myself. On top of all this, she is the biggest prude on the planet. We hardly ever have sex and when we do, it's not that great. I am pretty sure her "religion" is to blame for this because she feels bad for having sex before marriage.

I feel like there are reasons aside from looks for us to break up though. She is not motivated much. She does not want to go to grad school and only has a crap humanities degree. She says she will just work some shit job until I become a lawyer. I feel like she might be a bit immature as well. All I know is that I am a hard worker, and I want to do the best I can in law school. Last thing I want is for her to screw up my 1L year, which means everything. I should write a book about my life. It would make for an interesting story.
Last edited by tobeornottobe on Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

bartleby
Posts: 1315
Joined: Thu May 29, 2008 3:23 am

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby bartleby » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:56 pm

lol, is no one else reading the last sentence of point 4? OP is not exactly the most confident dude. he gazes into his mirror to assess his good looks (and he might be good looking) but i bet he lacks game.

BeenDidThat
Posts: 704
Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 12:18 am

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby BeenDidThat » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:57 pm

tobeornottobe wrote:May be I am too immature for a serious relationship. We have got into fights about her not wanting to go to the gym with me or play tennis with me. She used to be a great athlete in high school, but she doesn't seem to want to do much physical stuff anymore. I know I am an ass for stringing her along. I have lived with her for the past two years. That's why I find it hard to leave the relationship. I mean, we broke up 4 times, but I got back every time because she balled her ass off and I could not find it in me to break her heart. She told me she would never have lost her virginity to me had she known I would break up with her. I told myself that I can try to work it out, but things seem to be getting worse. I moved to another city for her leaving all my good friends behind. As of now, I hardly have any good friends in this city because I am with her all the time. For law school, I am deciding between in a law school in Washington or a law school in northern california. I almost want to move to Washington just so I can forget this old life in CA and start over in a new state. All my good friends are in northern california though, but we have grown apart because I have been away for a pretty long time. My situation is pretty sad. I am hoping law school can remedy this mess of a life I have made for myself. On top of all this, she is the biggest prude on the planet. We hardly ever have sex and we do, it's not that great. I am pretty sure her "religion" is to blame for this because she feels bad for having sex before marriage.

I feel like there are reasons aside from looks for us to break up though. She is not motivated much. She does not want to go to grad school and only has a crap humanities degree. She says she will just work some shit job until I become a lawyer. I feel like she might be a bit immature as well. All I know is that I am a hard worker, and I want to do the best I can in law school. Last thing I want is for her to screw up my 1L year, which means everything. I should write a book about my life. It would make for an interesting story.


Whiny and overly self-important. Keys to success in the shitlit game these days. I say go for it.

User avatar
IAFG
Posts: 6665
Joined: Mon Jun 15, 2009 1:26 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby IAFG » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:57 pm

InLikeFlint wrote:
IAFG wrote:
tobeornottobe wrote: I keep picturing myself dating more attractive girls.

I bet they aren't.


IAFG chimes in in every single hooking up/relationship thread to rip on anonymous male posters. Why?

It's mostly boredom, combined with a general distaste for 0Ls and guys who overestimate their pull with women, and then the first hand experience of watching law students just epically fail to score with girls outside the law school.

User avatar
quixotical
Posts: 386
Joined: Sat Apr 23, 2011 11:44 pm

Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship

Postby quixotical » Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:59 pm

I really want to know what law school OP is attending so I can be forewarned.

ETA: Oh good, he's in Washington or Cali. Looks like I'm safe.

OP: You sound like an arrogant, weak man. If you had any self-respect, or respect for your gf, you would have broken up with her long ago. It sounds like you stayed with her out of convenience/fear while simultaneously resenting her for not being more attractive. You're trying to paint yourself as the victim when you could have gotten out of the relationship long ago. You need to be honest with her and say you don't love her, because you obviously don't if her weight gain and face sans-makeup are dealbreakers for you. If you're going to be superficial, own it, and don't ruin her life by giving her the impression that you want to stay with her during law school.
Last edited by quixotical on Wed Jun 22, 2011 6:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.




Return to “Law School FAQ”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests