OP deserves mockery for reasons having nothing to do with his focus on her looks.GAIAtheCHEERLEADER wrote:Though the OP needs to man up and end it, I don't think that he's being superficial to a point that its LOL worthy. The first thing I care about in a guy is looks. My best friend is a man who absolutely adores me, supports me, and is always there for me when I need him, but I would never consider dating him just because I'm not physically attracted to him AT ALL. If you have to force the attraction, there simply is none.
I'm sorry but if I was with a guy who used to hit the gym and was all buff and sexy when we started fucking, but then got too comfortable and became fat while I was still in shape, I would lose interest. If I'm working out trying to look good for you, I expect you to at least try to do the same for me. Reciprocity matters. Besides, I would want my man to still look at me and find me sexually desirable. If I know I'm out of shape but my man is hanging out with his boys in bars/clubs amongst gorgeous girls (admittedly this isn't the case of the OP), that's when the seeds of jealousy and insecurity start to set in.
Looks aren't everything, but I'm honest enough to admit that it matters a hell of a lot to me. In this regard, the only difference between me and the OP is that I would (and did) have the balls to admit I wasn't happy and leave.
To stay or not to stay in this relationship Forum
- dresden doll
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
ITT girls are getting pissed and irrational. I would put $40.00 that every "no" vote is a girl.
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Hahahahahahahahaha. Underrated post.splitmuch wrote:Anyone else read this as she made OP agree to be a "couple" in order to bang?tobeornottobe wrote: 2. When I first met my girlfriend, I saw her with make-up on and thought she was very attractive. During all our dates, she wore make up. The first time I saw her without make-up was when we actually became a legitimate couple. The difference between her with make-up and without make-up is like night and day. I was shocked, but decided that I love her, so I stuck with the relationship.
- user08132021
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
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Last edited by user08132021 on Wed Jun 22, 2011 7:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- dresden doll
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Yeah, it's clearly completely irrational to think that OP should break up with a girl he has palpable disdain for.Total Litigator wrote:ITT girls are getting pissed and irrational. I would put $40.00 that every "no" vote is a girl.
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- 20121109
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
I see that. There are clearly red flags about his behavior that are lulzy...but I just feel that his focus on looks isn't really one of them.dresden doll wrote:OP deserves mockery for reasons having nothing to do with his focus on her looks.GAIAtheCHEERLEADER wrote:Though the OP needs to man up and end it, I don't think that he's being superficial to a point that its LOL worthy. The first thing I care about in a guy is looks. My best friend is a man who absolutely adores me, supports me, and is always there for me when I need him, but I would never consider dating him just because I'm not physically attracted to him AT ALL. If you have to force the attraction, there simply is none.
I'm sorry but if I was with a guy who used to hit the gym and was all buff and sexy when we started fucking, but then got too comfortable and became fat while I was still in shape, I would lose interest. If I'm working out trying to look good for you, I expect you to at least try to do the same for me. Reciprocity matters. Besides, I would want my man to still look at me and find me sexually desirable. If I know I'm out of shape but my man is hanging out with his boys in bars/clubs amongst gorgeous girls (admittedly this isn't the case of the OP), that's when the seeds of jealousy and insecurity start to set in.
Looks aren't everything, but I'm honest enough to admit that it matters a hell of a lot to me. In this regard, the only difference between me and the OP is that I would (and did) have the balls to admit I wasn't happy and leave.
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Edit:
(Apparently "no" wasn't clear enough...)dresden doll wrote:Yeah, it's clearly completely irrational to think that OP should break up with a girl he has palpable disdain for.Total Litigator wrote:ITT girls are getting pissed and irrational. I would put $40.00 that every "Stay in the relationship and make it work you douche" vote is a girl.
- quixotical
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Why do you assume girls would vote for this idiot to stay in a relationship with a woman he clearly has no respsect for nor any genuine interest in? I can't tell if you're harboring misogynistic tendencies or are just an imbecile (not that the two are mutually exclusive, of course).Total Litigator wrote:ITT girls are getting pissed and irrational. I would put $40.00 that every "no" vote is a girl.
- tyro
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
You just lost $40Total Litigator wrote:ITT girls are getting pissed and irrational. I would put $40.00 that every "no" vote is a girl.
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
And from the rest of the thread I think my theory makes even more sense. He doesn't really like her but is in the relationship for the "convenience" of having a girlfriend.Total Litigator wrote:Hahahahahahahahaha. Underrated post.splitmuch wrote:Anyone else read this as she made OP agree to be a "couple" in order to bang?tobeornottobe wrote: 2. When I first met my girlfriend, I saw her with make-up on and thought she was very attractive. During all our dates, she wore make up. The first time I saw her without make-up was when we actually became a legitimate couple. The difference between her with make-up and without make-up is like night and day. I was shocked, but decided that I love her, so I stuck with the relationship.
- AreJay711
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
TBF --and I'm not saying this is right -- but a lot of people are. Maybe he still deserves disdain for that but I think lots of people have that happen to them at some point. The inertia of the relationship keep you going after you no longer want to be in it. That said, OP should sack up.splitmuch wrote:And from the rest of the thread I think my theory makes even more sense. He doesn't really like her but is in the relationship for the "convenience" of having a girlfriend.Total Litigator wrote:Hahahahahahahahaha. Underrated post.splitmuch wrote:Anyone else read this as she made OP agree to be a "couple" in order to bang?tobeornottobe wrote: 2. When I first met my girlfriend, I saw her with make-up on and thought she was very attractive. During all our dates, she wore make up. The first time I saw her without make-up was when we actually became a legitimate couple. The difference between her with make-up and without make-up is like night and day. I was shocked, but decided that I love her, so I stuck with the relationship.
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
GAIAtheCHEERLEADER wrote:
Looks aren't everything, but I'm honest enough to admit that it matters a hell of a lot to me. In this regard, the only difference between me and the OP is that I would (and did) have the balls to admit I wasn't happy and leave.
But that difference is the important part.
As I said, I take no issue with the OP not wanting to be with someone who, for whatever reasons, he is no longer attracted to. I have problems with someone keeping that person they aren't attracted to around for safety, backup, until they find someone better, because it makes their life easier, etc etc.
I don't date people I don't find attractive, I don't think *most* people do, the problem with the OP is that he IS doing that, not that he's contemplating stopping. The stopping would be the mature and non-lulzy part.
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Let me clarify. Break up with her. Disinfect her. Wash her up. Fold her up. Put her back in the box from Sam's Toys and Videos. Revisit in 3 years.
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Completely agree, I was only commenting on it in regards to my point about her not giving it up until they were "official."AreJay711 wrote:TBF --and I'm not saying this is right -- but a lot of people are. Maybe he still deserves disdain for that but I think lots of people have that happen to them at some point. The inertia of the relationship keep you going after you no longer want to be in it. That said, OP should sack up.
- dresden doll
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
You forgot the part where they make internet threads to validate themselves by letting everyone know that they're much hotter than their girlfriend.sidhesadie wrote:GAIAtheCHEERLEADER wrote:
Looks aren't everything, but I'm honest enough to admit that it matters a hell of a lot to me. In this regard, the only difference between me and the OP is that I would (and did) have the balls to admit I wasn't happy and leave.
But that difference is the important part.
As I said, I take no issue with the OP not wanting to be with someone who, for whatever reasons, he is no longer attracted to. I have problems with someone keeping that person they aren't attracted to around for safety, backup, until they find someone better, because it makes their life easier, etc etc.
- albusdumbledore
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
I vote you string her along until she breaks up with you. That way, you can continue your disinterest in the relationship and then never have to do the dirty work of breaking up with her.
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- skw
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Here's my take: OP sounds like a guy about to start a new and demanding phase of his life. If his girlfriend is not interested in working out, this will not change with time. It (like most less than desirable traits in a SO) will only be more pronounced with time. Also consider that a young woman who moves to law school with her boyfriend WILL expect a ring and a date before the 3 year experience is over and likely before OP will be ready to make that kind of commitment to anyone (much less a girl who is mostly convenient and who he is not seriously attracted to). There is nothing wrong with OP breaking up with this girl to free himself up to concentrate on law school and all its associated experiences. In fact, this will most likely save both of them a lot of aggravation and heartache.
And before anyone accuses me of being a heartless guy, let me note for the record that I am 33, female, and happily married for 6 years.
And before anyone accuses me of being a heartless guy, let me note for the record that I am 33, female, and happily married for 6 years.
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Came back for one last update. I have decided to end it. It's better that I do it now than after a semester or year of law school when things could get much worse if she moves with me. One last question since I am deciding between a few law schools. Where are the girls hotter? Washington or Northern California?
- user08132021
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
tobeornottobe wrote:Came back for one last update. I have decided to end it. It's better that I do it now than after a semester or year of law school when things could get much worse if she moves with me. One last question since I am deciding between a few law schools. Where are the girls hotter? Washington or Northern California?
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- fatduck
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
i'll credit you with one brilliant decision: not making this thread with your real account.tobeornottobe wrote:Came back for one last update. I have decided to end it. It's better that I do it now than after a semester or year of law school when things could get much worse if she moves with me. One last question since I am deciding between a few law schools. Where are the girls hotter? Washington or Northern California?
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- dresden doll
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Not really sure why anyone would accuse you of that since you haven't exactly disagreed with the general tenor of this thread.skw wrote: And before anyone accuses me of being a heartless guy, let me note for the record that I am 33, female, and happily married for 6 years.
Last edited by dresden doll on Wed Jun 22, 2011 9:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- albusdumbledore
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
And not being a real person. TROLLOLOLOLOLfatduck wrote:i'll credit you with one brilliant decision: not making this thread with your real account.tobeornottobe wrote:Came back for one last update. I have decided to end it. It's better that I do it now than after a semester or year of law school when things could get much worse if she moves with me. One last question since I am deciding between a few law schools. Where are the girls hotter? Washington or Northern California?
- langdonbadger
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Honestly, the worst outcome would probably be you move wherever with her and then break up. I'd highly recommend not doing that.
- rayiner
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Re: To stay or not to stay in this relationship
Those girls are telling you they wish you're single because there is no danger of you actually trying to date them.tobeornottobe wrote:I do need new fucking friends as well. Lesson from this relationship seems to be not to date within friend circle. Okay, I am not Brad Pitt, but I would give myself a 7 or 8/10 on looks. Let's put it this way, many more attractive girls than my girlfriend have told me they wished I were single.
The thing is I do care about my girlfriend, but I cannot look beyond this "looks" thing for now. Also, guys be wary of girls with a ton of make-up. Before deciding to be in a relationship, have the girl wash her face for you. I feel like there are a lot more girls like my girl-friend who look like a dime with make-up, but end up looking like Kelly Osbourne without make-up. Where are all the girls with natural beauty?!!?
Also, what kind of guy can't see through makeup? Bone structure dude bone structure.
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