Having a baby during law school?

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olesya154
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby olesya154 » Wed Jan 14, 2009 3:03 pm

I had my baby during my junior year at an Ivy League undergrad (my second BA) and it was all perfect while I was pregnant. I think I was actually better off grades-wise than usual since I wasn't distracted too much by active social life and concentrated heavily on a healthy, stressless and caffeine-free existence :) . Then the first 6 months of my son's life while I had to be in school pretty much all the time due to tougher senior classes were quite miserable because I missed him so much. As one of the previous posters mentioned, babies are mostly nice and easy to deal with up until they start crawling (unless you are blessed with a colicky crier), but after the newborn "honeymoon" is over, the only way to study is at night or during short day naps. It is hard but doable, however I think that outside help should be mandatory whether it is from a happy daddy or a nanny. My son is 3 now and since I plan to go to law school in 2009 I am also wondering when I should have a second baby. What complicates life for me is that I work full-time...

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whyamidoingthis
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby whyamidoingthis » Wed Jan 14, 2009 3:17 pm

tbrewing wrote:One of my classmates is currently overdue and is planning on having the baby this friday. She plans to be back in classes next Tuesday. And plans to bring the baby to class with her for the first couple of weeks. I'm not a fan of babies in the classroom.


maybe I'm just a grumpy baby-less woman, but...not cool. I've been an au pair, I love kids, but I would be horrified if someone imposed their infant on me in the classroom.

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SmittyLaw
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby SmittyLaw » Wed Jan 14, 2009 3:25 pm

thats kinda like bringing a baby to a movie theatre.

CWF V
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby CWF V » Wed Jan 14, 2009 3:39 pm

OP,

The outliers to this conversation are the level of involvement from your (soon to be) husband. If he's all on board with being a super-involved Dad, then I'd say aim for having a child the summer of 1L (and I concur with the previous poster about "planning" for getting pregnant).

We had our child while I was in graduate school and right after my wife got her masters. Neither one of us could have predicted how much it would change our lives. It's awesome.

Best of luck on your decision!

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gpb19
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby gpb19 » Wed Jan 14, 2009 3:44 pm

Lol. The last few posts have made me wonder if I could bring a baby to campus and have the local collegiate chapter of my sorority watch him or her while I'm in class. :D I'm only half joking, too. I voluteer with them, so it's not like I'm some random alumna. And I know a quite a few of them could use the extra babysitting cash.

Not talking about every day, but in case of emergency only. Better than skipping class or bringing the kid to class (which I would never in a million years do), right?

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gpb19
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby gpb19 » Wed Jan 14, 2009 3:49 pm

amyLAchemist wrote:
gpb19 wrote:Lol. The last few posts have made me wonder if I could bring a baby to campus and have the local collegiate chapter of my sorority watch him or her while I'm in class. :D I'm only half joking, too. I voluteer with them, so it's not like I'm some random alumna. And I know a quite a few of them could use the extra babysitting cash.

Not talking about every day, but in case of emergency only. Better than skipping class or bringing the kid to class (which I would never in a million years do), right?


Oh, I volunteer with my sorority too as an advisor! Some of the girls I work with are actually quite mature and responsible. I wouldn't think it's the best option, but I don't think it's absolutely ridiculous if you feel like you can trust at least one of them.


Actually, I'd say nearly all of them have more experience with kids than I do. It's a really great group, lots of responsible girls. It's just the thought of dropping my kid off with the ugrad sorority that sounds so funny. :)

cannoneer
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby cannoneer » Wed Jan 14, 2009 5:17 pm

What's wrong with having a kid in class? If it's quiet, no harm done. If it's loud, it gets permanently kicked out. (Is it impossible for infants to be reliably quiet for an hour and a half?) Bearing children sounds like enough of a pain as it is - no need to make it even harder for nothing.

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srb
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby srb » Wed Jan 14, 2009 6:24 pm

littleboyblue wrote:
srb wrote:My Mom had a 2 yr old and a 4 yr old when she started law school, was pregnant with me when she graduated first in her class, and had me one month before the bar.

My Mom kicks ass.



your mom sounds kick ass. did she work after she graduated? what did she do?


Clerked for a District Court judge for a year, then began working at the firm she still works at right after that. She's a litigation partner at a big firm... and thank you!! She rocks.

littleboyblue
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby littleboyblue » Wed Jan 14, 2009 6:37 pm

srb wrote:
littleboyblue wrote:
srb wrote:My Mom had a 2 yr old and a 4 yr old when she started law school, was pregnant with me when she graduated first in her class, and had me one month before the bar.

My Mom kicks ass.



your mom sounds kick ass. did she work after she graduated? what did she do?


Clerked for a District Court judge for a year, then began working at the firm she still works at right after that. She's a litigation partner at a big firm... and thank you!! She rocks.


i assume her job is pretty intense and she did it full time when you were growing up. if that is the case, i am so excited to hear you say that she rocks. i worry that my kids will resent me for not being a stay at home mother. anything in particular she did to make you so well adjusted (assuming you are...)?

vet4lawschool
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby vet4lawschool » Wed Jan 14, 2009 7:07 pm

MrGradgrind wrote:The best time to have a baby is never. Children cost way too much money to maintain and would probably take too much effort to raise to be worth the time and money invested. I'd personally rather not share my resources with a child because the key piece of information is that once a person becomes a parent, their only two options are to: 1) be a deadbeat parent (not good) or 2) make the child their #1 priority (good). Obviously, it'd be hard to juggle law and a newborn baby, since babies are effectively helpless and need a lot of TLC.

For that reason, I'm getting a vasectomy before I start law school. Condoms aren't guaranteed to work and people should not trust the woman to take the pill.



haha

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underdawg
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby underdawg » Wed Jan 14, 2009 7:08 pm

is your mom single?

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animalcrkrs
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby animalcrkrs » Wed Jan 14, 2009 7:14 pm

If it were me I would do during 3L year. By then you probably will have an offer to work FT from a place you interned during the summers of 1L and 2L...then you can get a late start date after graduation and hang at home for a couple months, start and (hopefully) have the benefit of inclusive child care if it's a huge firm and if not at least the means and $$ to reasonably afford day care. (this is assuming you're going BigLaw)
If you have the baby after your offer has already been extended/accepted, they can't remove your offer because you got preganant. If you have the baby in 1L/2L, a company TECHNICALLY can't deny you a job because of it, but if they find out they just might anyway.

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srb
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby srb » Wed Jan 14, 2009 7:36 pm

littleboyblue wrote:
srb wrote:
littleboyblue wrote:
srb wrote:My Mom had a 2 yr old and a 4 yr old when she started law school, was pregnant with me when she graduated first in her class, and had me one month before the bar.

My Mom kicks ass.



your mom sounds kick ass. did she work after she graduated? what did she do?


Clerked for a District Court judge for a year, then began working at the firm she still works at right after that. She's a litigation partner at a big firm... and thank you!! She rocks.


i assume her job is pretty intense and she did it full time when you were growing up. if that is the case, i am so excited to hear you say that she rocks. i worry that my kids will resent me for not being a stay at home mother. anything in particular she did to make you so well adjusted (assuming you are...)?


She did work crazy hours, but every Saturday came to our soccer games or whatever we had going on, no matter what. So I think we just knew that she loved us and loved work and did both. Or maybe she just sucked less than my antisocial father...either way, we knew she kicked ass even if she worked a lot.

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whyamidoingthis
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby whyamidoingthis » Wed Jan 14, 2009 8:18 pm

cannoneer wrote:What's wrong with having a kid in class? If it's quiet, no harm done. If it's loud, it gets permanently kicked out. (Is it impossible for infants to be reliably quiet for an hour and a half?) Bearing children sounds like enough of a pain as it is - no need to make it even harder for nothing.


An hour and a half? Definitely not. Infants are just generally not that quiet. They coo, they "talk," they make noises even if they're not crying. Where do you draw the line on "not quiet?" Does the baby have to scream for 30 minutes straight? Or can it just giggle for ten minutes? When do you politely ask the woman to take her child home?

Babies have no place in the classroom unless everyone else in the class has said yes. The reasonable expectation when you go to a class is that the environment is conducive to learning and in my experience, that does not include babies.

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whyamidoingthis
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby whyamidoingthis » Wed Jan 14, 2009 8:22 pm

amyLAchemist wrote:
gpb19 wrote:Lol. The last few posts have made me wonder if I could bring a baby to campus and have the local collegiate chapter of my sorority watch him or her while I'm in class. :D I'm only half joking, too. I voluteer with them, so it's not like I'm some random alumna. And I know a quite a few of them could use the extra babysitting cash.

Not talking about every day, but in case of emergency only. Better than skipping class or bringing the kid to class (which I would never in a million years do), right?


Oh, I volunteer with my sorority too as an advisor! Some of the girls I work with are actually quite mature and responsible. I wouldn't think it's the best option, but I don't think it's absolutely ridiculous if you feel like you can trust at least one of them.


I wish I had volunteered with my sorority, I know there's a chapter in the area here, but I just never did it.

A lot of my sorority sisters babysat for professors' kids and in HS, we babysat for the children of grad students around here. UGs are definitely cheap labor (everyone needs extra pocket money!).

06072010
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby 06072010 » Wed Jan 14, 2009 8:30 pm

whyamidoingthis wrote:
tbrewing wrote:One of my classmates is currently overdue and is planning on having the baby this friday. She plans to be back in classes next Tuesday. And plans to bring the baby to class with her for the first couple of weeks. I'm not a fan of babies in the classroom.


maybe I'm just a grumpy baby-less woman, but...not cool. I've been an au pair, I love kids, but I would be horrified if someone imposed their infant on me in the classroom.


I would trip balls if someone brought their kid. Like freaking out in the Dean's office one nanosecond after class.

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Lizface killah
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby Lizface killah » Wed Jan 14, 2009 8:31 pm

srb wrote:My Mom had a 2 yr old and a 4 yr old when she started law school, was pregnant with me when she graduated first in her class, and had me one month before the bar.

My Mom kicks ass.



Is your mom Chuck Norris?

06072010
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby 06072010 » Wed Jan 14, 2009 8:31 pm

What's wrong with having a kid in class? If it's quiet, no harm done. If it's loud, it gets permanently kicked out. (Is it impossible for infants to be reliably quiet for an hour and a half?) Bearing children sounds like enough of a pain as it is - no need to make it even harder for nothing.


Because it's not a nursery. It's law school. Even just having a baby in the class would distract the mother and therefore distract me. Screw that. I'd punch that baby.

olderapplicant
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby olderapplicant » Wed Jan 14, 2009 10:37 pm

i've had two babies and the thought of bringing them to class is one of the most ridiculous things that i have ever heard. there is no possible way that a baby could stay quiet for that long (unless of course the mother drugged the child - which is something a daycare worker was accused of last year) and regardless would be completely distracting to the mother and every other student in the classroom. imagine sitting nearby and having to answer a question - if the child was fast asleep would you worry you would wake him/her up by speaking up too loudly. i can't imagine that this would ever be allowed.

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srb
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby srb » Wed Jan 14, 2009 11:15 pm

Lizface killah wrote:
srb wrote:My Mom had a 2 yr old and a 4 yr old when she started law school, was pregnant with me when she graduated first in her class, and had me one month before the bar.

My Mom kicks ass.



Is your mom Chuck Norris?


My Mom makes Chuck Norris cry. How bout them apples.

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underdawg
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby underdawg » Wed Jan 14, 2009 11:20 pm

pix?

legalized
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby legalized » Fri Jan 22, 2010 11:14 am

I need to find out how parents are managing with kids, in law school, especially away from family.

I am very glad I don't have to time and strategize the having of kids for law school or the start of legal career though...that sucks either way.

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jlnoa0915
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby jlnoa0915 » Fri Jan 22, 2010 11:23 am

I have no experience with this whatsoever, but if you decided to have a baby during law school then you are one brave soul and I wish you the best. That said one of my bosses coached crew at Columbia while attending law school there (not the first year and I understand that the two are markedly different but crew requires a tremendous time commitment) so albeit it would be difficult I don't see it as being impossible. Good luck to you.

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opus127
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby opus127 » Fri Jan 22, 2010 11:29 am

Hey, it looks like this is an old thread that got bumped, but I thought I'd chime in. I'm a law school baby. I was born near the end of my mom's 3rd year. She graduated at the top of her class, moved to a different state and passed the bar that summer, and spent the next year in a state supreme court clerkship. It sounds pretty crazy to me, but I think it helped that she had some down-time between the bar and the clerkship, and the clerkship had very reasonable hours.

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Sauer Grapes
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Re: Having a baby during law school?

Postby Sauer Grapes » Fri Jan 22, 2010 11:29 am

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Last edited by Sauer Grapes on Sun Aug 22, 2010 5:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.




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