Quotes from Law School

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nonunique
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby nonunique » Thu Apr 10, 2008 1:38 pm

I wasn't there for the delivery, but apparently my law&econ prof cracked himself up in an environmental discussion involving "free range beaver"...not a stunner, but made absolutely hilarious if you remember that this is an amazingly dry and boring econ prof. Imagine Ben Stein uttering the phrase and then slowly cracking up until he's doubled over in laughter.

06072010
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby 06072010 » Thu Apr 10, 2008 5:00 pm

student in response to con law prof's question: "yeah i think dred scott was rightly decided."


Rut roh. Gotta fucking love originalists. Assholes.

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seagull48
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby seagull48 » Thu Apr 10, 2008 9:59 pm

Rut roh. Gotta fucking love originalists. Assholes.


i know, right?! originalism/textualism is sooo the easy way out and they think they're on intellectually higher ground than the fuzzy, wobbly liberals. i love conlaw, but it brings out the very worst in people. another golden moment was when somebody distinguished Gonzales v. Raich from Wickard by saying that there is no market for marijuana.

Juliet
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby Juliet » Mon Apr 14, 2008 11:52 pm

Professor discussing case analysis People v. Butts in my writing and research class

"Now... as we can see in Butts [*snicker giggle giggle*] sorry... usually I can hold a straight face when I say that."

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Corsair
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby Corsair » Mon Apr 14, 2008 11:56 pm

..

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bumpjon
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby bumpjon » Tue Apr 15, 2008 12:42 am

In Property today:
Stud: (Describing facts of case and structure of mortgage) And the defendant went in with 4 large.
Prof: (looking confused) 4 what? Is that like 40 Benjamins?
Stud: Or 400 Dimes.
Prof: You know y'all could make any of this up and I'd believe it?

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GodSpeed
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby GodSpeed » Tue Apr 15, 2008 7:25 am

my civ pro prof busted out a dance from you got served when we were talking about due process. I was startled and amused.

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Curious George
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby Curious George » Tue Apr 15, 2008 8:28 am

jmo7 wrote:Crim law professor telling about courtroom conversation with guy who had been accused of murder.

texas ranger brings in shovel that was thought to be used to bury the body.

defendant's reaction: "we've got them sons of bitches now, they got the wrong shovel"


That sounds an awful lot like those bad jokes my uncle would repeatedly recite to me when he started getting tipsy.

By the way, I love this thread.

06072010
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby 06072010 » Tue Apr 15, 2008 9:30 am

From the BARBRI Civ Pro Lecture -- that guy is classic, btw.

"Another 4-4 vote with Stevens refusing to pick a side. I don't know what the guy is doing. Smelling flowers or something."

RTR10
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby RTR10 » Tue Apr 15, 2008 4:17 pm

In a professional responsibility seminar:

"Nothing's coming in Brooke Shields, er, I mean near Brooke Shields."

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bumpjon
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby bumpjon » Wed Apr 16, 2008 10:17 am

In Con Law discussing State Action Doctrine: It's kind of like Sesame Street. (Miming putting people in boxes on the white board) If you take a state trooper, firefighter, the mayor, and a McDonald's employee. (Singing) One of theses thing are not like the other...


In Contracts (same class where Prof. asked about student campaigning on fact that he's not a sex offerder) discussing Jacob & Youngs v. Kent: Hey, if anyone comes over to you house and asks to see your pipe I guess you could take them into your utility room and let them squeeze your water heater. (Prof. realizes what he's saying) Hey guys, I'm not the registered sex offender!

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wiki.entertainme
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby wiki.entertainme » Wed Apr 16, 2008 10:07 pm

ajlrf03 wrote:
Prof: "Mr. [last name]"
Student: "No, sir, it's actually [actual last name]"
Prof: "Don't you lie to me! It's right here on my roll sheet!"


hahahahhahahhahaha.....

that is so hilarious...I LOVE this thread btw....

06072010
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby 06072010 » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:23 pm

Another Barbri lecture on special damages needed to be pleaded with heightened specificity:

"In addition to pain and suffering, the guy had an erection that wouldn't go away! My wife has been pushing me in front of cars ever since!"

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bumpjon
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby bumpjon » Thu Apr 17, 2008 2:23 pm

In property discussing the Takings Clause:

Prof: So there's two types of takings. There's physical appropriations and what? (No one answers, he looks to his 7 y.o. son he borught to class) Do you know?

Son: (looking at legal pad) Inverse condemnation

Prof: See, any 7 y.o. knows that!

RTR10
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby RTR10 » Mon Apr 21, 2008 12:47 pm

Prof today in Con Law discussing Lawrence v. Texas:

You know I can't watch a sports game without seeing an ad for Viagra. Sometimes I have a consenting partner. An adult consenting partner. I'm getting older, and all I can think about is what she needs. I don't need the law in my bedroom because then I can't perform. And then she won't like me anymore.

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bumpjon
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby bumpjon » Mon Apr 21, 2008 3:10 pm

In Evidence discussing Lay and Expert Witnesses when prof. advanced powerpoint slide to a sliade titled "Lay Witnesses" when the guy next to me leans over and says "I thought we weren't allowed to do that"

Fourttier
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby Fourttier » Mon Apr 21, 2008 3:26 pm

bumpjon wrote:In Evidence discussing Lay and Expert Witnesses when prof. advanced powerpoint slide to a sliade titled "Lay Witnesses" when the guy next to me leans over and says "I thought we weren't allowed to do that"


It depends, if it is your witness, it is ok, if it is opposing counsel's witness, it would be witness tampering.

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bumpjon
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby bumpjon » Mon Apr 21, 2008 4:31 pm

Either way I don't think it's allowed. However, nothing would prevent you from trolling the halls of the courthouse finding witnesses to lay from other cases.

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kktoot
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby kktoot » Fri Apr 25, 2008 8:53 pm

"Fiduciary comes from Latin... 'fido' for faithful.... with a douche--not exactly Latin--in the middle there. Fye-douche-iary."

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BlueDevilSarah
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby BlueDevilSarah » Fri Apr 25, 2008 9:20 pm

I asked my Con Law prof for some sample questions to prepare for his exam (this was right before spring break)

"I'm going to give you some advice, a secret really. No one ever takes my advice, but here it is for what it's worth. The best way to prepare is not to practice.....it is to study."

Then he looked really pleased with himself, even though his yarmulke was balanced on the side of his head like a jaunty beret. I'm very impressed with myself for not smacking him.

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nonunique
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby nonunique » Fri Apr 25, 2008 10:47 pm

A certain ConLaw prof mentioned immediately above also offers this reassurance in response to his students "reading too much" into a decision:

"Often the answer to why the Court held this way or why the Court held the other way is because one argument had five votes and the other had four."

Yogi? Is that you?

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Corsair
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby Corsair » Fri Apr 25, 2008 10:53 pm

..

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kktoot
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby kktoot » Fri Apr 25, 2008 11:01 pm

Another one. Coming across a lot from my property professor as I read my notes... final on Monday.

"It's hard enough to find someone in this life to love, what should their internal or external plumbing have to do with it?

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BlueDevilSarah
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby BlueDevilSarah » Fri Apr 25, 2008 11:28 pm

I was impressed with our Con Law prof's inability to get his own phone number right when he was offering help before the exam.

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Corsair
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Re: Quotes from Law School

Postby Corsair » Fri Apr 25, 2008 11:48 pm

..




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