So, I think I'm losing my mind.
I am getting absolutely battered to hell this quarter. One major grade setback really hammered my psyche, which is part of it, but it is more the relentless workload this quarter. I'm pulling 50 hours weeks and falling behind.
If that was my only issue, I'd be fine. I can handle this kind of work load for a few more weeks until the end of the year.
My problem... I'm horrified about the overall affect it's having on me, when one considers that the prize for winning the law school game--as I largely have, thus far--is ~70 hour workweeks for years, doing work that is less interesting than class work, on a more regimented time scale.
I seriously don't understand. I've pulled 80-hour workweeks since I was in high school, if you consider job + school. For parts of undergrad, I worked 3 jobs while taking 18 credits, and many of those classes were 1-credit classes with 6 hours of rehearsal a week.
If I can't handle 50 hours of pseudo-legal work a week for the limited time frame of a few weeks, how in God's name am I going to handle biglaw?
It's incredibly frusterating. I have been lucky enough to largely win this stupid law school game. I got one bad grade last quarter that may have dropped me out of #1 in my class, but I still have strong grades. I'm lucky enough to go to a better school than I have any business attending--the vast majority of people here are much, much smarter than me, and those who aren't are just somewhat smarter than me. Yet I have an overwhelming desire to throw in the towel, because I don't think I can keep my grades where they are, and even if I do, I'm starting to think I'll last about 3 weeks in the prize at the end of all of this before flaming out.
get yourself together. one bad grade at a top 6 and youre thinking of dropping out? If 50 hours of crappy, boring, horrible work plus one setback is enough to make you quit, youre going to get eaten alive when you have 75 hour weeks with a bastard of a boss in a competitive setting (where you might not be the tippy top of the heap.)
I dont mean to be all negative but I had a similar brutal work experience when working for an investment bank and it totally wasnt worth it. that being said, once your panic attack is over you need to evaluate if youre competitive enough to go hard for another 5-7 years (finish school, go biglaw). if not, dont waste anymore time.