Sharing office as a NYC associate - always same gender? Forum

[wiz]

There's a difference between the "transninja justice warrior" shit or whatever you want to call it, which is literally just "political correctness," and then forcing it down someone's throat when they're asking about a situation at work and never once tried to implicate gender preference. Please don't bring that drivel into the on-topics when someone is asking a very legitimate question.

Edit: this is directed at scottydoesntknow

Nice anon abuse bro

Yeah, obviously non-bros don't commit anon abuse.

[bearsfan23]

Hi. Tell me that students won't figure shit out next semester and that I'll still do well. K thanks.

Scotti seems like a chill, sociable bro. Glad he's around to provide advice. I'm not sure how we'd know anything about BigLaw if we didn't have this special 1L posting

[rpupkin]

Rarely, the co-ed office can be exquisitely awkward. My (much beloved) officemate was a woman, and once she got a call back from a doctor, asked the guy to hold, and said something to the effect of "this is my ob/gyn, I've been waiting a week for him to call back, and we're having this conversation now, so, sorry", and then they spoke about things that, generally, would not be shared with a man in the room. I would imagine that some of my friends would've been a bit squeamish about that one.

Uhhh....isn't the normal thing to do to step outside of the office when someone is having a personal conversation like that? I have my own office now, but I've shared offices in my pre-law life. It would never occur to me to just hang out while a co-worker had a highly personal conversation. This isn't a gender thing.

[Desert Fox]

Rarely, the co-ed office can be exquisitely awkward. My (much beloved) officemate was a woman, and once she got a call back from a doctor, asked the guy to hold, and said something to the effect of "this is my ob/gyn, I've been waiting a week for him to call back, and we're having this conversation now, so, sorry", and then they spoke about things that, generally, would not be shared with a man in the room. I would imagine that some of my friends would've been a bit squeamish about that one.

Uhhh....isn't the normal thing to do to step outside of the office when someone is having a personal conversation like that? I have my own office now, but I've shared offices in my pre-law life. It would never occur to me to just hang out while a co-worker had a highly personal conversation. This isn't a gender thing.

Generally the rule is, if you want privacy, you leave. But this is also why the whole sharing offices thing is pennywise pound foolish.

[Anonymous User]

Rarely, the co-ed office can be exquisitely awkward. My (much beloved) officemate was a woman, and once she got a call back from a doctor, asked the guy to hold, and said something to the effect of "this is my ob/gyn, I've been waiting a week for him to call back, and we're having this conversation now, so, sorry", and then they spoke about things that, generally, would not be shared with a man in the room. I would imagine that some of my friends would've been a bit squeamish about that one.

Uhhh....isn't the normal thing to do to step outside of the office when someone is having a personal conversation like that? I have my own office now, but I've shared offices in my pre-law life. It would never occur to me to just hang out while a co-worker had a highly personal conversation. This isn't a gender thing.

I wasn't just "hanging out"; that's my desk, I was doing work and I had the usual deadlines to hit.

[hdunlop]

They'll send you a form where you talk a little bit about yourself and what you're looking for in an officemate (dietary restrictions, favorite bands, sleeping preferences) so you could probably list your gender preference on that.

You probably shouldn't list your gender preference on a form like that...

I thought the 0Ls were getting pretty aspie but damn

[seizmaar]

live long enough, and you become the thing you hate.

[UVAIce]

This is why you work for a firm that doesn't make first-year associates shares offices.

[Anonymous User]

thank you TLS for continuously reminding how fucking socially awkward you have to be to thrive in big law

[rahulg91]

This is why you work for a firm that doesn't make first-year associates shares offices.

Do firms normally give SAs offices to share?

[Other25BeforeYou]

This is why you work for a firm that doesn't make first-year associates shares offices.

Do firms normally give SAs offices to share?

Depends on the firm. Some give SAs their own offices, some give them offices to share, some give them paralegal offices. Usually depends on what's available. I had my own office at my firm, and my law school best friend at a different firm shared a corner office with two other SAs.

[Anonymous User]

This is why you work for a firm that doesn't make first-year associates shares offices.

Do firms normally give SAs offices to share?

I think it's standard at most firms with medium-to-large SA class sizes, even if the associates don't share offices (most of my friends at DC firms with 25+ SA class sizes shared offices). Though firms with smaller class sizes generally don't need to resort to sharing.

[Lawyerrr]

It's usually boy-boy, girl-girl at most NYC firms.

[Anonymous User]

Bump.

This is absolutely NOT a stupid question. As a heterosexual, married male, my life will be much easier if I have a male officemate. I will spend more time around my officemate than with my wife. My long hours will be annoying enough for her without the added issue of her knowing that I spend most of that time sitting 10 feet away from another woman. "Gender-is-a-social-construct" notwithstanding , I really could do without all of that...

I'm returning to my SA firm this fall as an associate, and am wondering same thing about officemates. I feel like writing in a gender preference on a questionnaire (where they don't ask for it) could look weird...

[rpupkin]

This is absolutely NOT a stupid question. As a heterosexual, married male, my life will be much easier if I have a male office mate. I will spend more time around my office mate than with my wife. My long hours will be annoying enough for her without the added issue of her knowing that I spend most of that time sitting 10 feet away from another woman. "Gender-is-a-social-construct" notwithstanding ( ), I really could do without all of that...

Dude, I'd worry less about the gender of your office mate and more about your marriage. Regardless of your shared office situation, you're going to have to work closely with women throughout your professional career in the law. If your wife actually has a problem with that, you're in for a rough ride.

[Anonymous User]

In my opinion, "working closely" is very different from sharing an office... We're talking long hours, late nights, etc. I'm not saying my wife would be concerned, or that she should be concerned, I'm just saying it's not far fetched to think that a spouse could get weird about it, and it's not that hard to avoid the whole thing by just having a male office mate.

[rpupkin]

In my opinion, "working closely" is very different from sharing an office... We're talking long hours, late nights, etc. I'm not saying my wife would be concerned, or that she should be concerned, I'm just saying it's not far fetched to think that a spouse could get weird about it, and it's not that hard to avoid the whole thing by just having a male office mate.

Have you ever worked in a professional environment? Your instincts here are weird. You're probably less likely to hook up with an office mate than you are with a girl who works on another floor.

[Anonymous User]

My firm office (in NY) doesn't have shared offices, whether SA or otherwise, though it used to. And speaking to the mid-levels who initially had to share offices, it sounded like they usually paired up two guys or two girls. Don't think it would be a big deal to share with the other gender. Someone mentioned that having a private convo with a gyno would be awkward with a male office-mate. But would it really be that much worse than a male having a private convo with his urologist about his erectile dysfunction with his male co-worker in the room? Everyone has private convos from time to time, whether male or female.

[Anonymous User]

Yes, have worked in professional environment (see above post). Sorry you don't like my "instincts" (?).

Anyone else?

[jrf12886]

Here it's occasionally co-ed, but much more commonly same-gender. I had an office-mater who is the same sex, as did all the first years in my group. Never really thought about it until you asked.

[kcdc1]

In my opinion, "working closely" is very different from sharing an office... We're talking long hours, late nights, etc. I'm not saying my wife would be concerned, or that she should be concerned, I'm just saying it's not far fetched to think that a spouse could get weird about it, and it's not that hard to avoid the whole thing by just having a male office mate.

Have you ever worked in a professional environment? Your instincts here are weird. You're probably less likely to hook up with an office mate than you are with a girl who works on another floor.

To be fair, it seems like he's more concerned with the appearance of impropriety than any actual impropriety, and you're more likely to find yourself alone in a room with your officemate at 1 AM than you you are with a person who works on another floor. Whether one's spouse is comfortable with that scenario playing out regularly is a separate issue. Ideally, s/he would be, but I suppose it's not impossible that such a scenario could generate anxiety in an otherwise happy marriage.

[jbagelboy]

I've shared an office with someone of the opposite gender before on several occasions (while I've had a serious SO). It's not weird at all. Unless you make it weird, I guess. And if your SO is concerned, I mean, there's counseling available for that kind of thing because it's certainly overprotective.

[dixiecupdrinking]

Regardless of whether or not you have a legitimate reason to have a preference, or the health of your marriage, your employer almost certainly has no single-sex office policy.

ETA: I was the one who said that questionnaire thing like six months ago. Apparently, I need to clarify it was a joke. That is something that colleges do when pairing roommates. It is not, in my experience or to my knowledge, something that professional services firms do when deciding which of their incoming professionals will share offices. Maybe I'm wrong and Skadden is asking first years to list their favorite bands on a form, I dunno, but I guess this bears clarification.

[Anonymous User]

What do you mean by "single-sex office policy"?

Do you mean you probably cannot request a same-sex office mate, or there is probably no default same-sex officemate policy, or something different?

[dixiecupdrinking]

What do you mean by "single-sex office policy"?

Do you mean you probably cannot request a same-sex office mate, or there is probably no default same-sex officemate policy, or something different?

I mean that they don't assign offices based on gender or ask you for your preference, and you would look like a retrograde weirdo if you made such a request.