Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

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Anonymous User
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby Anonymous User » Tue Nov 19, 2013 12:50 pm

Me to OCS: I am thinking about moving to X state after graduation, how do I find alumni there.

OCS: I dont know. Check our webpage?

Next meeting:

Me: Well, I did my own research, and I found A, B, C, and D alum.

OCS: Oh you should research all of our alum for us!

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mephistopheles
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby mephistopheles » Thu Nov 21, 2013 7:47 pm

i hope that's not true

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minnbills
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby minnbills » Fri Nov 22, 2013 12:19 am

Anonymous User wrote:
bwv812 wrote:
thatgirlthere wrote:
Anonymous User wrote:I'm at a T-14 where plenty of people had a hard time getting something from OCI. I do not know one African American who didn't get a biglaw job out of OCI. In fact most if them had SA jobs last summer and just moved up the ranking this summer.

It's good to be a URM in law school. White male not so much.


This is how idiots think.

If you are weighing the pros and cons of being a URM, you can't just take in the boost in jobs without taking in the documented struggles they face.


Does this really need to be anonymous? Anyways, there is some truth to it. I lost a job offer to a diversity hire too. I'm sorry that it's taboo for TLS due to some of the mods, but it's a subject that deserves some discussion.


Anyways, funniest thing I've run into was the lawyer who asked me my sexual orientation in an interview.

"Soooo are you the straighty? Because I'm a homo."

No joke. Then he told me my face had a "youthful glow." It was pretty crazy. I was disappointed when I didn't get an offer though.

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Pleasye
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby Pleasye » Fri Nov 22, 2013 12:58 am

minnbills wrote:I lost a job offer to a diversity hire too.

:|

How do you know that's why you lost the job offer?

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hichvichwoh
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby hichvichwoh » Fri Nov 22, 2013 1:08 am

Pleasye wrote:
minnbills wrote:I lost a job offer to a diversity hire too.

:|

How do you know that's why you lost the job offer?


nope, no AA talk. back to terrible OCS stories.

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minnbills
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby minnbills » Fri Nov 22, 2013 2:06 am

Pleasye wrote:
minnbills wrote:I lost a job offer to a diversity hire too.

:|

How do you know that's why you lost the job offer?


Friend of my mom's works there. I've already said too much.

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bwv812
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby bwv812 » Fri Nov 22, 2013 6:38 am

minnbills wrote:
Pleasye wrote:
minnbills wrote:I lost a job offer to a diversity hire too.

:|

How do you know that's why you lost the job offer?


Friend of my mom's works there. I've already said too much.

And if you got the job someone would complain of nepotism.

I also doubt they ever say, even internally, something like "this non-diverse person is who we really want to hire, but we're going to pass him over because of this diverse person." And if they do have this conversation, it stays within the hiring committee, where it's in everyone's interest to make sure this information doesn't get out. Maybe "you were our first alternate" is just a really nice way of letting you down gently?

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JazzOne
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby JazzOne » Fri Nov 22, 2013 9:19 am

Anonymous User wrote:Me to OCS: I am thinking about moving to X state after graduation, how do I find alumni there.

OCS: I dont know. Check our webpage?

Next meeting:

Me: Well, I did my own research, and I found A, B, C, and D alum.

OCS: Oh you should research all of our alum for us!

Sure thing! When do I start? It's a paid position, right?

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jingosaur
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby jingosaur » Fri Nov 22, 2013 11:19 am

JazzOne wrote:
Anonymous User wrote:Me to OCS: I am thinking about moving to X state after graduation, how do I find alumni there.

OCS: I dont know. Check our webpage?

Next meeting:

Me: Well, I did my own research, and I found A, B, C, and D alum.

OCS: Oh you should research all of our alum for us!

Sure thing! When do I start? It's a paid position, right?


Only if it counts as JD Required Full Time employment.

Anonymous User
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby Anonymous User » Fri Nov 22, 2013 12:21 pm

jingosaur wrote:
JazzOne wrote:
Anonymous User wrote:Me to OCS: I am thinking about moving to X state after graduation, how do I find alumni there.

OCS: I dont know. Check our webpage?

Next meeting:

Me: Well, I did my own research, and I found A, B, C, and D alum.

OCS: Oh you should research all of our alum for us!

Sure thing! When do I start? It's a paid position, right?


Only if it counts as JD Required Full Time employment.


Nah, they said I had to pay them more for the privilege, but it is still JD Required FT :D

Anonymous User
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby Anonymous User » Fri Nov 22, 2013 12:27 pm

minnbills wrote:
Pleasye wrote:
minnbills wrote:I lost a job offer to a diversity hire too.

:|

How do you know that's why you lost the job offer?


Friend of my mom's works there. I've already said too much.

I highly doubt that was the only reason you weren't hired. Blacks are only 8.1 percent of summer classes. There were plenty of white dudes who also took your job.

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JazzOne
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby JazzOne » Fri Nov 22, 2013 1:04 pm

Anonymous User wrote:
minnbills wrote:
Pleasye wrote:
minnbills wrote:I lost a job offer to a diversity hire too.

:|

How do you know that's why you lost the job offer?


Friend of my mom's works there. I've already said too much.

I highly doubt that was the only reason you weren't hired. Blacks are only 8.1 percent of summer classes. There were plenty of white dudes who also took your job.

Minnbills is spewing all kinds of ridiculousness ITT.

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minnbills
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby minnbills » Fri Nov 22, 2013 1:40 pm

Anonymous User wrote:
minnbills wrote:
Pleasye wrote:
minnbills wrote:I lost a job offer to a diversity hire too.

:|

How do you know that's why you lost the job offer?


Friend of my mom's works there. I've already said too much.

I highly doubt that was the only reason you weren't hired. Blacks are only 8.1 percent of summer classes. There were plenty of white dudes who also took your job.


It was for a satellite office. One opening.

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androstan
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby androstan » Wed Dec 04, 2013 12:18 pm

BlueLotus wrote:
mephistopheles wrote:
worldtraveler wrote:
androstan wrote:"I'm not doing OCI, I don't think a big law firm is for me."

- Person with mediocre grades


That isn't that absurd. Maybe she has something else lined up. I didn't do OCI.



a shame. oci was great for professional development, actually


heh, same here, didn't even do oci. focused my energy on EJW/direct applying to jerbs (straight up pi gunner here).


This person was not a PI gunner, had no family connections, and had nothing else lined up. Basically had no idea what to do with his/her life.

kykiske
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby kykiske » Thu Feb 27, 2014 2:10 pm

Any new funny stories?

I unfortunately have not overheard anything too stark. Just the general dumb chatter by 1Ls talking about 1L SAs/OCI.

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Danger Zone
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby Danger Zone » Thu Feb 27, 2014 3:30 pm

brotherdarkness wrote:
Anonymous User wrote:I wonder what the responses would have been if I had made this a "What's the funniest thing Career Services has said to you?" thread.


"Network."

I posted this in the 2L thread, but for this thread's benefit, here is a real poster at my school:

Image

Remember, kids: it's your fault that you don't have a job.

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horriblegb
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby horriblegb » Thu Feb 27, 2014 4:01 pm

Omg that is hilarious

I have NEVER received a job through networking. All of my legal internships, summer jobs, post grad, what have you have been through direct mailings to firms or applications

and I networked my ass off, or at least it felt that way to me.

Anonymous User
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby Anonymous User » Thu Feb 27, 2014 4:02 pm

Danger Zone wrote:
brotherdarkness wrote:
Anonymous User wrote:I wonder what the responses would have been if I had made this a "What's the funniest thing Career Services has said to you?" thread.


"Network."

I posted this in the 2L thread, but for this thread's benefit, here is a real poster at my school:

Image

Remember, kids: it's your fault that you don't have a job.

That's disgusting.

A few months before OCI, I took my resume to CSO.

CSO: Divide it into these categories and use bullet points for each item. Bullet points are the best!
Me: Okay.

I come back a month or so later with my resume exactly matching their advice. I talk to the exact same guy.

Me: I'm pretty happy with my resume format now.
CSO: Hmmm, but all these bullet points would be way better as [non-bulleted] paragraphs. And let's take out this spacing to make more room! [tries to take out literally all the spacing in the document].

Instead of turning my resume into a giant wall of text, I ignored CSO and went to a 2L friend who'd secured an OCI job the year before me for advice and got offers. That shit would have been impossible for HR to scan. Maybe this is why only about 12% of the class at my school get OCI jobs.

Some days I feel like I should stand outside CSO with a big warning sign.

kykiske
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby kykiske » Thu Feb 27, 2014 4:17 pm

I feel like "networking" to CSO means going to "events" listed on Symplicity.

But I NEVER find those events helpful. All the conversations I've ever had at those are superficial. And they usually do not last longer than 3 minutes.

I'd much rather just go to lunch/coffee with attorneys on a one-on-one setting. I've expressed that interest to my CSO counselor, and it fell on deaf ears.

dead head
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby dead head » Thu Feb 27, 2014 5:13 pm

kykiske wrote:I'd much rather just go to lunch/coffee with attorneys on a one-on-one setting. I've expressed that interest to my CSO counselor, and it fell on deaf ears.

What do you mean when you say you have "expressed that interest to [your] CSO counselor, and it fell on deaf ears"? They're not going to set up 1-on-1 coffee meetings with lawyers that share your interests. That doesn't mean you shouldn't try to reach out to alumni through Martindale or whatever to try and make them happen.

Anonymous User
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby Anonymous User » Thu Feb 27, 2014 6:11 pm

The partner who offered me a job my 1L summer graduated law school in the 80's. He told me, "So next summer, just go to one of the big firms in Chicago or New York, see how you like it. And I think you'll be back here, but you never know."

He said it like placement in big law is the student's choice. Just a total 180 in what the truth is these days. The sad thing is that a partner who graduated just a decade ago said something almost identical.

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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby Anonymous User » Thu Feb 27, 2014 8:23 pm

It's pretty depressing, but I haven't been able to convince a single person not to go to law school. At my T-14, I'd say about 1/4 of the kids who WANTED a biglaw job didn't get one (I have no idea what the total number still looking is).

One of my buddies went to a similarly ranked school, and struck out at OCI. All throughout 1L year he would talk about how great his school's job prospects were, and now he barely speaks to me, mainly because he's ashamed that he has nothing lined up for his 2L summer.

Another one of my friends got accepted into a lower-ranked school with a stipulated scholarship. She was under the delusion that she would end up in the top 10% and land a biglaw job. Despite warning after warning, she ignored me and went. She's below median after first semester, and will probably end up paying sticker for her last two years and end up with no job.

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rachelzane
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby rachelzane » Thu Feb 27, 2014 9:16 pm

CSO held a reception yesterday for "those that will be competitive at OCI". CSO flashed a computer printout of a picture of a Wall Street Journal page 1 and RAVED about how just today the WSJ published the legal job market is booming. Skeptical, I went home and opened up the journal...front of the Marketplace section "Law Firms Feel the Burn" (stressed legal market).

I'm decently sure they photoshopped something and then blatantly lied.

Same meeting:
"If you're willing to go to [bumfuck nowhere], we're like Harvard to them."
Yes, that's exactly where I want to start my legal career.

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kay2016
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby kay2016 » Thu Feb 27, 2014 9:45 pm

rachelzane wrote:CSO held a reception yesterday for "those that will be competitive at OCI". CSO flashed a computer printout of a picture of a Wall Street Journal page 1 and RAVED about how just today the WSJ published the legal job market is booming. Skeptical, I went home and opened up the journal...front of the Marketplace section "Law Firms Feel the Burn" (stressed legal market).

I'm decently sure they photoshopped something and then blatantly lied.

Same meeting:
"If you're willing to go to [bumfuck nowhere], we're like Harvard to them."
Yes, that's exactly where I want to start my legal career.


There was a WSJ article that was more optimistic earlier this week... But it definitely didn't say it was booming. I'll try to find the link later if no one posts it.

(Still shame on CSO for boasting when the economy sucks despite any good articles)

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rachelzane
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Re: Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process?

Postby rachelzane » Thu Feb 27, 2014 9:57 pm

kay2016 wrote:
rachelzane wrote:CSO held a reception yesterday for "those that will be competitive at OCI". CSO flashed a computer printout of a picture of a Wall Street Journal page 1 and RAVED about how just today the WSJ published the legal job market is booming. Skeptical, I went home and opened up the journal...front of the Marketplace section "Law Firms Feel the Burn" (stressed legal market).

I'm decently sure they photoshopped something and then blatantly lied.


There was a WSJ article that was more optimistic earlier this week... But it definitely didn't say it was booming. I'll try to find the link later if no one posts it.

(Still shame on CSO for boasting when the economy sucks despite any good articles)


Ah you're right, I found it online. "Hiring of Law Grads Improves for Some" on Monday. They definitely misrepresented the situation. However, after reading the article it is good to know that once you secure a 2L SA the chances of an offer coming from it are almost back to normal.




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