Anonymous User wrote:I'm going to add a different perspective. I'm in an international long-distance marriage with my husband because we just couldn't make working/studying in the same city work. I know several other married law students in my class who are also in long-distance situations. It's part of the difficulty with millennials' lives. So it doesn't have to be an either-or decision.
One suggestion is to take turns making sacrifices for each other. In my case, my husband (a foreigner) sacrificed a good job in his home country to move to the US and be with me. After he got into Harvard, I sacrificed going to a T-14 to be with him in Boston. When work forced him abroad, he decided it was my turn to decide where to settle next. So in your case, you can take turns. It can definitely be frustrating giving up better job/study opportunities, but if you both do it for each other, and if you both truly love each other, you can make it work.
However, what worries me is that you say you are going to break up if you can't live in the same city. If you break up over something like that, how will you survive marriage and all of its trials? I think you need to seriously think about that before taking the plunge.
I wish you all the best in making your decision!
This. I worked with a guy (a lawyer) who lived separate from his now wife (a doctoral student) for their engagement and first year of their marriage. When she finished her degree and got a permanent placement he moved. This advice is of course predicated on you being in love and sure of your desire to spend your life together.