Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

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Re: Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

Postby Anonymous User » Sat Sep 08, 2012 11:41 pm

If you end up talking to your friend about the specifics of striking out, make sure that he knows that there is hope. Because of the way that offers work (many students keep open multiple offers at once), many firms wind up having slots to fill in October or September and either posting on Symplicity or looking to mass-mails to hire additional people. There were tons of firms that did this at my lower-T14. I struck out at OCI, and this is how I got my job (as did many other people I know, even if it isn't something that's discussed on TLS often). Reading TLS made me feel quite apocalyptic—literally, the phrase many people reach for when a person strikes out is "killself"—as it turned out, this wasn't logical at all and TLS posters are often far more paranoid than they need to be.

In short, there's still a ton of hope for your friend. I had just gone through some difficult times personally in addition to striking out, and was incredibly depressed as well during this time. I pushed through and am now the happiest I've ever been. There's still hope. Make sure he knows that.

09042014
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Re: Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

Postby 09042014 » Sat Sep 08, 2012 11:51 pm

Op here, the guy killed himself, but the admin is going to give him a jd anyway, so all is good.

User has been outed and warned.

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Re: Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

Postby Anonymous User » Sun Sep 09, 2012 12:01 am

Anonymous User wrote:If you end up talking to your friend about the specifics of striking out, make sure that he knows that there is hope. Because of the way that offers work (many students keep open multiple offers at once), many firms wind up having slots to fill in October or September and either posting on Symplicity or looking to mass-mails to hire additional people. There were tons of firms that did this at my lower-T14. I struck out at OCI, and this is how I got my job (as did many other people I know, even if it isn't something that's discussed on TLS often). Reading TLS made me feel quite apocalyptic—literally, the phrase many people reach for when a person strikes out is "killself"—as it turned out, this wasn't logical at all and TLS posters are often far more paranoid than they need to be.

In short, there's still a ton of hope for your friend. I had just gone through some difficult times personally in addition to striking out, and was incredibly depressed as well during this time. I pushed through and am now the happiest I've ever been. There's still hope. Make sure he knows that.


THANK YOU. <3 super depressed ccn student.

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Re: Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

Postby Anonymous User » Sun Sep 09, 2012 2:21 am

Anonymous User wrote:
Anonymous User wrote:If you end up talking to your friend about the specifics of striking out, make sure that he knows that there is hope. Because of the way that offers work (many students keep open multiple offers at once), many firms wind up having slots to fill in October or September and either posting on Symplicity or looking to mass-mails to hire additional people. There were tons of firms that did this at my lower-T14. I struck out at OCI, and this is how I got my job (as did many other people I know, even if it isn't something that's discussed on TLS often). Reading TLS made me feel quite apocalyptic—literally, the phrase many people reach for when a person strikes out is "killself"—as it turned out, this wasn't logical at all and TLS posters are often far more paranoid than they need to be.

In short, there's still a ton of hope for your friend. I had just gone through some difficult times personally in addition to striking out, and was incredibly depressed as well during this time. I pushed through and am now the happiest I've ever been. There's still hope. Make sure he knows that.


THANK YOU. <3 super depressed ccn student.


I'm not sure myself how to keep holding on after striking out twice at 2L OCI and now not receiving any calls from judges for clerkships. Also ccn student. And it hasn't been for lack of trying. Been mass mailing and everything, including networking beyond typical bar events, actively meeting lawyers for informational meetings, getting career advice from professionals outside the school, getting my grades up so now have honors. I'm no longer so depressed as I used to be when I was considering suicide, but don't exactly feel good or hopeful. Couple years of intense therapy to get my depression under control, and hard to feel like it has been worth it if still can't establish a career and increasingly isolated.

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rouser
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Re: Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

Postby rouser » Sun Sep 09, 2012 2:44 am

cinephile wrote:I'd be careful of mentioning anything to the school or any school's psych counseling. Many schools have a policy of forcing students who talk of suicide to take a leave of absence, and if he's forced out of the school and back home to his parents who may/may not take him back, who knows what he might do? It might be better for him to be around friends at school now than alone. If you're going to call someone for help, make sure they're not affiliated with your school.

I agree with this unless you're sure he's not messing around. Telling the school might make things worse...(his best buddy tattled on him? who can he trust now?) If you care about this person, tell him you will loan him money/help him find a job/live at your apartment if necessary.

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Re: Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

Postby Stanford4Me » Mon Sep 10, 2012 1:17 am

Too many mentally unstable people go to law school.

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Re: Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

Postby Professor_Rau » Mon Sep 10, 2012 1:28 am

Stanford4Me wrote:Too many mentally unstable people go to law school.


Unfortunately, law school and the practice of law have a tendency to bring out the worst in people. Normal people become druggies, alcoholics, and serial killers due simply to the toxicity of issue-spotter exams and 20-minute cattle-call interviews.

I don't meant to joke around, or make light of OP's friends situation (in fact, I am in a somewhat similar, but less severe situation). But there is quite a lot of truth to what I just said. Maybe law just magnifies issues people have that were microscopic before. At any rate, I don't think judging people who melt down in law school is TCR because law school does weird things to some people who did fine in their previous lives.

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Re: Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

Postby 09042014 » Sun Sep 16, 2012 2:04 am

Desert Fox wrote:Op here, the guy killed himself, but the admin is going to give him a jd anyway, so all is good.

User has been outed and warned.


Satire has value as discourse humorless, philistine mods.

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Re: Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

Postby Anonymous User » Wed Sep 19, 2012 9:29 pm

I'm sure this has been said, but, you need to get your friend help. Nothing is more important than making your friend realize his life is valuable, and that people really do care about him.

There are so many options, but how about you simply talk to him to see what's on his mind. Maybe he needs someone to listen. From there, you can decide what course of action to take, all the while keeping in mind what he wants as well, so you don't make him feel as though you are taking his decision-making power and self-worth.

Grades don't matter. Taking a leave of absence doesn't matter.

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Re: Friend Talking About Suicide After Striking Out At OCI

Postby Anonymous User » Wed Sep 19, 2012 10:58 pm

i am an asian and i have horribly overbearing asian parents. i was terrified that they would disown me as well. but i think really the key thing here is to help your friend see that striking out at OCI is NOT the end of the world, and that his entire family will NOT disown him. i understand how the asian mentality can make you feel like everything rides on getting a job, but make sure that your friend can see that his parents will love and accept and help him even if he didn't get a job this time around. (at least, if they're normal asian parents, they will.)

talk about it with your friend first and try to help him see that his family will still love and support him. for asians this can be incredibly difficult to believe because of how result-oriented asian parents can be, but ask him if he can think of any instances where he failed at something but his parents came to his aid anyway. if he really can't think of any, show him that he has a huge support network of friends who will respect him and care about him and support him regardless.




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