gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

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Cupidity
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gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Cupidity » Wed Jul 27, 2011 1:42 pm

Here's the situation. I'm chugging along on my mass-mailing, I've completed NY, and Boston, and I'm now turning to work on DC. (I'm aware I'm a bit behind).

Here is the issue, I have no ties whatsoever to DC. One of the reasons I am interested in DC is because it is one of the small handful of places that currently has gay marriage. I'm wondering if it would be appropriate, or beneficial, or stupid, to work a sentence into my standard cover letter like this:

"One of the reasons I am interested in the Washington, DC office of X firm is because of X firm's (hrc score, or glbt pro-bono project, or vault diversity ranking) and the recognition of same-sex marriage."

Risky? Potentially worth it? I really have no other DC justification.

katisse
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby katisse » Wed Jul 27, 2011 1:48 pm

If this is a genuine life consideration, I think its compelling.
If its something you're doing just to get some type of boost, I wouldn't do it.

Aston2412
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Aston2412 » Wed Jul 27, 2011 1:51 pm

Don't know that you really need to say gay marriage specifically. If you address the firm's commitment to diversity in a way that sets you up as LGBT, I think you only need to tie yourself to DC in the interview if they ask you, "Why DC?" and you can talk about how you love politics, the laid-back style of the city compared to NY and how they let you get married.

I thought about it for my Boston cover letters (that's the city that I have no ties to) but ultimately decided against it.

Just my thoughts.

desertlaw
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby desertlaw » Wed Jul 27, 2011 2:03 pm

What about during an interview with a firm in one of the 30+ states that has a man-woman marriage amendment? Can you say that you really want to be in a state that only recognizes traditional marriage?

Aston2412
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Aston2412 » Wed Jul 27, 2011 2:16 pm

Anonymous User wrote:What about during an interview with a firm in one of the 30+ states that has a man-woman marriage amendment? Can you say that you really want to be in a state that only recognizes traditional marriage?


Seems like this one has greater potential for harm than good and any good that could come of it would be marginal at best. You'd basically need to get a conservative recruiter in a conservative law firm in a conservative state. If those stars align for you, feel free.

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Cupidity
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Cupidity » Wed Jul 27, 2011 2:17 pm

desertlaw wrote:What about during an interview with a firm in one of the 30+ states that has a man-woman marriage amendment? Can you say that you really want to be in a state that only recognizes traditional marriage?


Won't be an issue. I only applied to NYC, DC, and Boston.

To the other poster, yes it actually is a serious consideration.

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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Anonymous User » Wed Jul 27, 2011 3:33 pm

This is actually one of the reasons I've added a few NYC firms, and it's definitely a big consideration for me and my partner. Also no ties to DC (other than liking politics/policy and the type of regulatory work they do) but it'll be something I bring up during interviews.

Also make sure to emphasize it if a firm has a "gay gross-up" tax policy in place (I know Debevoise just announced that they've instituted it). Easy way for firms to show they care about GLBT families, and they aren't super well-publicized so it shows you did your research.

Aston2412
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Aston2412 » Wed Jul 27, 2011 3:41 pm

I'm a big fan of firms that offer paternity leave for gay couples at the same rate as maternity leave for a primary caregiver.

Don't think I'll talk about it in interviews though - no firm wants to hear that you'll be taking time off for your life!

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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Anonymous User » Wed Jul 27, 2011 3:50 pm

Aston2412 wrote:I'm a big fan of firms that offer paternity leave for gay couples at the same rate as maternity leave for a primary caregiver.

Don't think I'll talk about it in interviews though - no firm wants to hear that you'll be taking time off for your life!


This actually bumped one firm up significantly in my OCI bidding. 12 weeks paid paternity leave for both parents if you adopt.

---OP here, I accidentally anyonymoused this

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Glock
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Glock » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:01 pm

I would not put it. It does not actually tie you to DC in significant to the reader way because there are other places that allow and recognize it. You are saying "I like DC because" when you need to find something that establishes firmer ties to the place.

More importantly there is a significant portion of the population that is at least moderately disgusted by your lifestyle. They will discriminate against you in a consequence-free way when they can. You can say that you would not want to work for these people anyway, but they exist in every large firm (even the pro-diversity ones). I am saying that it can hurt you more than it helps you.

You can make a stand for what you believe in and all that, but I would not. Find another way to establish DC ties. Do you have ANY relatives there?

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Cupidity
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Cupidity » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:05 pm

Glock wrote:I would not put it. It does not actually tie you to DC in significant to the reader way because there are other places that allow and recognize it. You are saying "I like DC because" when you need to find something that establishes firmer ties to the place.

More importantly there is a significant portion of the population that is at least moderately disgusted by your lifestyle. They will discriminate against you in a consequence-free way when they can. You can say that you would not want to work for these people anyway, but they exist in every large firm (even the pro-diversity ones). I am saying that it can hurt you more than it helps you.

You can make a stand for what you believe in and all that, but I would not. Find another way to establish DC ties. Do you have ANY relatives there?


Literally nothing. My strongest connection is that I fly over it. My resume makes it pretty clear I'm gay anyway.

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Glock
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Glock » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:14 pm

Cupidity wrote:
Glock wrote:I would not put it. It does not actually tie you to DC in significant to the reader way because there are other places that allow and recognize it. You are saying "I like DC because" when you need to find something that establishes firmer ties to the place.

More importantly there is a significant portion of the population that is at least moderately disgusted by your lifestyle. They will discriminate against you in a consequence-free way when they can. You can say that you would not want to work for these people anyway, but they exist in every large firm (even the pro-diversity ones). I am saying that it can hurt you more than it helps you.

You can make a stand for what you believe in and all that, but I would not. Find another way to establish DC ties. Do you have ANY relatives there?


Literally nothing. My strongest connection is that I fly over it. My resume makes it pretty clear I'm gay anyway.



If it is already clear there is not much to lose then. It does not seem like a huge plus but it is better than no connection. I might word it around DC being a more comfortable place with better legal protections for same-sex couples.

ExpectLess
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby ExpectLess » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:14 pm

desertlaw wrote:What about during an interview with a firm in one of the 30+ states that has a man-woman marriage amendment? Can you say that you really want to be in a state that only recognizes traditional marriage?


Maybe it's just me, but I'd think the ability to get married yourself (or lack thereof) is a much more compelling reason to go somewhere than the fact that another group unrelated to your own marriage is barred from doing so, however passionately you may believe people shouldn't have equal rights.

de5igual
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby de5igual » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:17 pm

am i seriously the only 'mo that likes it here in the red states?

Aston2412
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Aston2412 » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:19 pm

f0bolous wrote:am i seriously the only 'mo that likes it here in the red states?


Oh yes.

I grew up in the South. I ran screaming for joy as soon as I finished undergrad.

Aston2412
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Aston2412 » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:20 pm

Cupidity wrote:Literally nothing. My strongest connection is that I fly over it. My resume makes it pretty clear I'm gay anyway.


Are you male? We can trade.

Ie I'll pretend to be your boyfriend for D.C. if you'll pretend to be my boyfriend for Boston.



P.S. I'm only half-joking, PM me if you want to talk through this :mrgreen:

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Glock
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Glock » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:24 pm

f0bolous wrote:am i seriously the only 'mo that likes it here in the red states?



I love red states. I blend in and feel less pressure to have particular political views. I find them significantly more accepting of libertarians, on average.

Kretzy
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Kretzy » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:25 pm

Aston2412 wrote:
Cupidity wrote:Literally nothing. My strongest connection is that I fly over it. My resume makes it pretty clear I'm gay anyway.


Are you male? We can trade.

Ie I'll pretend to be your boyfriend for D.C. if you'll pretend to be my boyfriend for Boston.

P.S. I'm only half-joking, PM me if you want to talk through this :mrgreen:


It's times like this, proving ties to a big city, that my boyfriend and I both being from the mountain west proves wholly unhelpful. I REALLY played up the gay thing during 1L job search for diversity programs, so if you want to chat about ways to do it, I've been there, done that already. Family has to look out for one another :)

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Cupidity
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Cupidity » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:26 pm

Aston2412 wrote:
Cupidity wrote:Literally nothing. My strongest connection is that I fly over it. My resume makes it pretty clear I'm gay anyway.


Are you male? We can trade.

Ie I'll pretend to be your boyfriend for D.C. if you'll pretend to be my boyfriend for Boston.



P.S. I'm only half-joking, PM me if you want to talk through this :mrgreen:


Brilliantly unethical! I'd consider it if my BF wouldn't kill me. I have heard stories of relationships sealing the deal at interviews. A senior associate at a major boston firm told me that they weren't going to hire him because all of his ties were southern, but they went and asked him why he wanted to leave south carolina for Boston, and he said that he was gay, and now he's almost partner.

Aston2412
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Aston2412 » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:30 pm

Cupidity wrote: A senior associate at a major boston firm told me that they weren't going to hire him because all of his ties were southern, but they went and asked him why he wanted to leave south carolina for Boston, and he said that he was gay, and now he's almost partner.


So maybe I'll be ok then?

I've got a few friends in Boston that I could ask this favor of, the problem is that I actually know them and we haven't spoken in a few years so it gets kind of awkward. But you? You're a complete stranger protected by the anonymity of the interwebs!

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Cupidity
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Cupidity » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:32 pm

Aston2412 wrote:
Cupidity wrote: A senior associate at a major boston firm told me that they weren't going to hire him because all of his ties were southern, but they went and asked him why he wanted to leave south carolina for Boston, and he said that he was gay, and now he's almost partner.


So maybe I'll be ok then?

I've got a few friends in Boston that I could ask this favor of, the problem is that I actually know them and we haven't spoken in a few years so it gets kind of awkward. But you? You're a complete stranger protected by the anonymity of the interwebs!


Party at ClubCafe this summer after we both get hired at Ropes?

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ndirish2010
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby ndirish2010 » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:33 pm

Glock wrote:
f0bolous wrote:am i seriously the only 'mo that likes it here in the red states?



I love red states. I blend in and feel less pressure to have particular political views. I find them significantly more accepting of libertarians, on average.


Surprisingly, people in the red states are more accepting of most things. Even some things that they don't agree with. :shock:

Aston2412
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Aston2412 » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:38 pm

Cupidity wrote:
Aston2412 wrote:
Cupidity wrote: A senior associate at a major boston firm told me that they weren't going to hire him because all of his ties were southern, but they went and asked him why he wanted to leave south carolina for Boston, and he said that he was gay, and now he's almost partner.


So maybe I'll be ok then?

I've got a few friends in Boston that I could ask this favor of, the problem is that I actually know them and we haven't spoken in a few years so it gets kind of awkward. But you? You're a complete stranger protected by the anonymity of the interwebs!


Party at ClubCafe this summer after we both get hired at Ropes?


Yea, I'm not getting hired at Ropes. If I do, we'll party at the nicest place in town because it means that not only is God real but that He also loves the gays!

Still, I'll head over from Fol(ies) or Choate or Nixon - wherever my parachute lands me.

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Cupidity
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Cupidity » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:43 pm

Foley Hoag is an awesome place, its my #2 right now.

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Glock
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Re: gay marriage in cl to demonstrate regional pref?

Postby Glock » Wed Jul 27, 2011 4:45 pm

ndirish2010 wrote:
Glock wrote:
f0bolous wrote:am i seriously the only 'mo that likes it here in the red states?



I love red states. I blend in and feel less pressure to have particular political views. I find them significantly more accepting of libertarians, on average.


Surprisingly, people in the red states are more accepting of most things. Even some things that they don't agree with. :shock:




The intolerance of intolerance is often more noticeable and upsetting than the intolerance in the first place. I am often surprised with how little red state people care about someone holding an opposing view.




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