Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

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crumpetsandtea
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby crumpetsandtea » Mon Jul 11, 2011 12:21 pm

paratactical wrote:
Renzo wrote:This is credited. I can't work 10% of the office equipment, but I found out quick who did so that I can go to them when I'm helpless and confused.

This is 75% of the most stressful shit I deal with. I found someone trying to jam paper in the wrong side of a huge printer last week because they thought that was how they faxed something.

LOLOLOL wait, seriously? HAHAHAHA

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paratactical
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby paratactical » Mon Jul 11, 2011 12:25 pm

crumpetsandtea wrote:
paratactical wrote:
Renzo wrote:This is credited. I can't work 10% of the office equipment, but I found out quick who did so that I can go to them when I'm helpless and confused.

This is 75% of the most stressful shit I deal with. I found someone trying to jam paper in the wrong side of a huge printer last week because they thought that was how they faxed something.

LOLOLOL wait, seriously? HAHAHAHA

Yup. Or the partner who emailed me 45+ times this weekend "Hey, can you send me the depo of guy x?" "Hey, can you email me docket no Y?" "Hey, can you email me the correspondence from June?" We have a web database set up so that with his email, password and RFID pin he can access it from anywhere. I spend a shiatton of time making sure every relevant item in every case is up on this site immediately so that I can spend all weekend emailing him shit that would be incredieasy to find on his own.

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crumpetsandtea
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby crumpetsandtea » Mon Jul 11, 2011 12:42 pm

paratactical wrote:
crumpetsandtea wrote:
paratactical wrote:
Renzo wrote:This is credited. I can't work 10% of the office equipment, but I found out quick who did so that I can go to them when I'm helpless and confused.

This is 75% of the most stressful shit I deal with. I found someone trying to jam paper in the wrong side of a huge printer last week because they thought that was how they faxed something.

LOLOLOL wait, seriously? HAHAHAHA

Yup. Or the partner who emailed me 45+ times this weekend "Hey, can you send me the depo of guy x?" "Hey, can you email me docket no Y?" "Hey, can you email me the correspondence from June?" We have a web database set up so that with his email, password and RFID pin he can access it from anywhere. I spend a shiatton of time making sure every relevant item in every case is up on this site immediately so that I can spend all weekend emailing him shit that would be incredieasy to find on his own.

lololol. This boggles my mind. Not because people dont' know how to use the machinery (everyone had to learn it at some point) but because they'd try to stick papers in the printing slot instead of just...asking someone where the fax machine is.

seatown12
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby seatown12 » Mon Jul 11, 2011 1:43 pm

Should send the partner one email only, with a link to the database, then ignore any subsequent emails. Tell him if he doesn't understand the database you're happy to go over it with him Monday.

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paratactical
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby paratactical » Mon Jul 11, 2011 2:48 pm

seatown12 wrote:Should send the partner one email only, with a link to the database, then ignore any subsequent emails. Tell him if he doesn't understand the database you're happy to go over it with him Monday.

I like being employed.

seatown12
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby seatown12 » Mon Jul 11, 2011 3:01 pm

paratactical wrote:
seatown12 wrote:Should send the partner one email only, with a link to the database, then ignore any subsequent emails. Tell him if he doesn't understand the database you're happy to go over it with him Monday.

I like being employed.

If the partner not only can't figure out the database and expects you, over the weekend, to email him things he can easily retrieve himself, but would also fire you for offering to instead explain the database (thereby saving the office valuable man hours), then I don't see what there is to like.

luthersloan
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby luthersloan » Mon Jul 11, 2011 3:02 pm

money, it can be used to buy goods and services, and to repay bad ass loan sharks like the department of education.

seatown12
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby seatown12 » Mon Jul 11, 2011 3:43 pm

Might as well just be a prostitute then, the hourly rates a little better and no JD needed

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paratactical
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby paratactical » Mon Jul 11, 2011 3:48 pm

seatown12 wrote:If the partner not only can't figure out the database and expects you, over the weekend, to email him things he can easily retrieve himself, but would also fire you for offering to instead explain the database (thereby saving the office valuable man hours), then I don't see what there is to like.

While it is irritating and pretty high maintenence, it's not anywhere near the top of the list in terms of ridiculous things people in biglaw ask for outside of normal office hours. Part of your job, as a lower-level biller, is to assist the higher-level billers so that they can focus on the substantial issues and make valuable use of their time.

seatown12
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby seatown12 » Mon Jul 11, 2011 4:20 pm

Maybe there needs to be another thread: "most retarded thing a biglaw partner has ever done"

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kapachino
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Re: Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done?

Postby kapachino » Mon Jul 11, 2011 4:46 pm

I interned at a small boutique firm one summer during UG, and one of my unofficial duties was help the associate I was working for keep his fiance from finding out about his girlfriend. Fiance's name: Jacqueline. Mistress' name: Jaclyn. I managed to keep them separate for the entire summer, until three weeks before the internship ended. I told the fiance that I'd gotten the information for a concert that she'd asked about, and handed it to her. She kind of stared at it, looked at me, stared at it again, and then said the associate must have asked about it and I had gotten confused. She got really excited about going, and he actually took her, IIRC.

In hindsight, I have no idea why I agreed to do this, other than the fact that I was young, and wanted to keep the internship. It wasn't my business, anyway. I still don't like the fact that I helped this guy cheat on his future wife.




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