Most Retarded Thing a Summer Clerk Has Ever Done? Forum

[Renzo]

I sat in on a mediation, and kept updating our position on my facebook page.

Snap. We have a winner. Hard to imagine anything stupider than breaking client confidences via Facebook.

I didn't put the real positions. I did it to fool them. (I had a buddy on the other side.)

Yep. Still an ethics violation.

[Anonymous User]

I sat in on a mediation, and kept updating our position on my facebook page.

Snap. We have a winner. Hard to imagine anything stupider than breaking client confidences via Facebook.

I didn't put the real positions. I did it to fool them. (I had a buddy on the other side.)

Yep. Still an ethics violation.

I had permission. We were really fooling the other side. (So it wasn't unethical because they thought they spying on us.)

[seatown12]

I sat in on a mediation, and kept updating our position on my facebook page.

Snap. We have a winner. Hard to imagine anything stupider than breaking client confidences via Facebook.

I didn't put the real positions. I did it to fool them. (I had a buddy on the other side.)

Yep. Still an ethics violation.

How

[Renzo]

Yep. Still an ethics violation.

How

Two ways, probably. First, it relates to a client representation, and that's definitely not allowed. Unless of course this alleged Facebook post didn't disclose anything about the representation (not even the fact that they were involved in mediation, for example).

Second, depending on how false the positions were, that might be it's own ethical violation. Lawyers can't use deception as a bargaining tactic.

[Renzo]

I had permission. We were really fooling the other side. (So it wasn't unethical because they thought they spying on us.)

Now I think this is complete BS. An attorney turned to you and said, "hey, post something on facebook about being in a mediation session; hopefully the opposing counsel will check it and think you're giving away or position;" really?

And, as mentioned above, had it actually happened, it would still be unethical. You can't lie to get an outcome you like, even in mediation.

[Anonymous User]

Yep. Still an ethics violation.

How

Two ways, probably. First, it relates to a client representation, and that's definitely not allowed. Unless of course this alleged Facebook post didn't disclose anything about the representation (not even the fact that they were involved in mediation, for example).

Second, depending on how false the positions were, that might be it's own ethical violation. Lawyers can't use deception as a bargaining tactic.

There wasn't any deception.
I posted the real numbers.
They thought it was fake, and that our guys thought they had the real ones.
Our guys thought they thought it was real, and that our guys thought it was fake.

So you see, what everyone thought was real was actually real except what was fake because they thought it was fake. It didn't make any difference because everyone thought the other side had what they actually had but none of it was real and that was what everyone thought. Just my buddy and I had a good laugh.

[eandy]

There wasn't any deception.
I posted the real numbers.
They thought it was fake, and that our guys thought they had the real ones.
Our guys thought they thought it was real, and that our guys thought it was fake.

So you see, what everyone thought was real was actually real except what was fake because they thought it was fake. It didn't make any difference because everyone thought the other side had what they actually had but none of it was real and that was what everyone thought. Just my buddy and I had a good laugh.

Correct. That is the dumbest thing a summer clerk has ever done.

[Renzo]

There wasn't any deception.
I posted the real numbers.
They thought it was fake, and that our guys thought they had the real ones.
Our guys thought they thought it was real, and that our guys thought it was fake.

So you see, what everyone thought was real was actually real except what was fake because they thought it was fake. It didn't make any difference because everyone thought the other side had what they actually had but none of it was real and that was what everyone thought. Just my buddy and I had a good laugh.

Correct. That is the dumbest thing a summer clerk has ever done.

What, making up a stupid story that didn't happen and posting it anonymously online? That's pretty dumb, but certainly not the dumbest thing a Summer has ever done (assuming the poster is even a summer clerk).

[Anonymous User]

Male SA. Had sex with a female partner during my first week on the job. Basically, she's a super hot milf, we had a summer event, she seemed to be flirting with me, I made a move. Wish I could give more details

I don't think it was retarded, and I certainly don't regret it; the sex was good, and it continued throughout my SA. Don't think anyone knew/knows, but I guess we'll find out when offers come out in a few months?

Flaaaamee

Believe what you want. It happened. No real way for me to prove it to you I suppose because for obvious reasons I cant give too many details on the internet.

I don't get why everyone is calling flame. This kind of thing has definitely happened at my firm, and I'm sure will happen again. And in my experience, it's the partner people are disgusted with when it comes out, not the SA.

[sunynp]

Male SA. Had sex with a female partner during my first week on the job. Basically, she's a super hot milf, we had a summer event, she seemed to be flirting with me, I made a move. Wish I could give more details

I don't think it was retarded, and I certainly don't regret it; the sex was good, and it continued throughout my SA. Don't think anyone knew/knows, but I guess we'll find out when offers come out in a few months?

Flaaaamee

Believe what you want. It happened. No real way for me to prove it to you I suppose because for obvious reasons I cant give too many details on the internet.

I don't get why everyone is calling flame. This kind of thing has definitely happened at my firm, and I'm sure will happen again. And in my experience, it's the partner people are disgusted with when it comes out, not the SA.

The partners should be disgusted because it puts them in a very bad position. Neither the female partners nor the male partners should be having sex with summer associates at the firm. That said, it isn't a good career move for the SA either. People will find out for sure, people having sex are never as discrete as they think they are being. The other partners will always think of SA as the guy who had sex with one of the partners. An affair happening in the office isn't something people forget.

[sunynp]

There wasn't any deception.
I posted the real numbers.
They thought it was fake, and that our guys thought they had the real ones.
Our guys thought they thought it was real, and that our guys thought it was fake.

So you see, what everyone thought was real was actually real except what was fake because they thought it was fake. It didn't make any difference because everyone thought the other side had what they actually had but none of it was real and that was what everyone thought. Just my buddy and I had a good laugh.

Correct. That is the dumbest thing a summer clerk has ever done.

What, making up a stupid story that didn't happen and posting it anonymously online? That's pretty dumb, but certainly not the dumbest thing a Summer has ever done (assuming the poster is even a summer clerk).

Your firm doesn't have a policy about what you post on social media? Don't post anything about work in social media, even as a joke. It will bite you in the ass eventually. I think you are the winner in the stupidity thread so far.

[dresden doll]

Your firm doesn't have a policy about what you post on social media? Don't post anything about work in social media, even as a joke. It will bite you in the ass eventually. I think you are the winner in the stupidity thread so far.

I think I heard a woosh.

[FloridaCoastalorbust]

Clerk at DA's office my first week. ADA was in a huge hurry and asked me to photocopy a docket for the day (40 pages or something) as she was already late to a PTC. Of course I rushed to the copy room and started making the copy. At the time I was unaware that you can photocopy several pages at once by placing the doc in a tray above the copier, so I lifted the lid of the copier and was copying the doc, page by page, replacing each one by one. As you can imagine this was taking quite awhile, and she finally stormed in after about 10 mins and asked, "What the HELL is taking so long??!?" I was still oblivious to my mistake and was thinking that she was just oversensitive. She ends up ripping the rest of the docket out of my hand and throws it in the copier, of course finishing the copy in ~30 secs. Needless to say she didn't make eye contact with me for the rest of the summer, let alone give me any assignments. But at least I know how a copier works now

[Anonymous User]

There wasn't any deception.
I posted the real numbers.
They thought it was fake, and that our guys thought they had the real ones.
Our guys thought they thought it was real, and that our guys thought it was fake.

So you see, what everyone thought was real was actually real except what was fake because they thought it was fake. It didn't make any difference because everyone thought the other side had what they actually had but none of it was real and that was what everyone thought. Just my buddy and I had a good laugh.

Correct. That is the dumbest thing a summer clerk has ever done.

What, making up a stupid story that didn't happen and posting it anonymously online? That's pretty dumb, but certainly not the dumbest thing a Summer has ever done (assuming the poster is even a summer clerk).

Your firm doesn't have a policy about what you post on social media? Don't post anything about work in social media, even as a joke. It will bite you in the ass eventually. I think you are the winner in the stupidity thread so far.

Are you referring to the made up story, or to this thread?
I doubt I will get in any trouble from this thread since it is: A. anonymous, and B. I don't work for a firm.

[Renzo]

Clerk at DA's office my first week. ADA was in a huge hurry and asked me to photocopy a docket for the day (40 pages or something) as she was already late to a PTC. Of course I rushed to the copy room and started making the copy. At the time I was unaware that you can photocopy several pages at once by placing the doc in a tray above the copier, so I lifted the lid of the copier and was copying the doc, page by page, replacing each one by one. As you can imagine this was taking quite awhile, and she finally stormed in after about 10 mins and asked, "What the HELL is taking so long??!?" I was still oblivious to my mistake and was thinking that she was just oversensitive. She ends up ripping the rest of the docket out of my hand and throws it in the copier, of course finishing the copy in ~30 secs. Needless to say she didn't make eye contact with me for the rest of the summer, let alone give me any assignments. But at least I know how a copier works now

I'm going to quote this as proof of all the things you might learn by taking a entry-level job for a few years between undergrad and law school

[Bronte]

Clerk at DA's office my first week. ADA was in a huge hurry and asked me to photocopy a docket for the day (40 pages or something) as she was already late to a PTC. Of course I rushed to the copy room and started making the copy. At the time I was unaware that you can photocopy several pages at once by placing the doc in a tray above the copier, so I lifted the lid of the copier and was copying the doc, page by page, replacing each one by one. As you can imagine this was taking quite awhile, and she finally stormed in after about 10 mins and asked, "What the HELL is taking so long??!?" I was still oblivious to my mistake and was thinking that she was just oversensitive. She ends up ripping the rest of the docket out of my hand and throws it in the copier, of course finishing the copy in ~30 secs. Needless to say she didn't make eye contact with me for the rest of the summer, let alone give me any assignments. But at least I know how a copier works now

Haha nice. You probably should have known this (even if, as Renzo alluded to, you are a "K-JD," as the two-years-of-entry-level-work-experience people are saying now) but sounds relatively harmless. But the DA's office doesn't have secretaries? I'm at a super underfunded governmental organization, and there's people to make copies.

[Renzo]

Clerk at DA's office my first week. ADA was in a huge hurry and asked me to photocopy a docket for the day (40 pages or something) as she was already late to a PTC. Of course I rushed to the copy room and started making the copy. At the time I was unaware that you can photocopy several pages at once by placing the doc in a tray above the copier, so I lifted the lid of the copier and was copying the doc, page by page, replacing each one by one. As you can imagine this was taking quite awhile, and she finally stormed in after about 10 mins and asked, "What the HELL is taking so long??!?" I was still oblivious to my mistake and was thinking that she was just oversensitive. She ends up ripping the rest of the docket out of my hand and throws it in the copier, of course finishing the copy in ~30 secs. Needless to say she didn't make eye contact with me for the rest of the summer, let alone give me any assignments. But at least I know how a copier works now

Haha nice. You probably should have known this (even if, as Renzo alluded to, you are a "K-JD," as the two-years-of-entry-level-work-experience people are saying now) but sounds relatively harmless. But the DA's office doesn't have secretaries? I'm at a super underfunded governmental organization, and there's people to make copies.

This is credited. I can't work 10% of the office equipment, but I found out quick who did so that I can go to them when I'm helpless and confused.

[Bronte]

This is credited. I can't work 10% of the office equipment, but I found out quick who did so that I can go to them when I'm helpless and confused.

It's so key to befriend the office personnel. The secretary in my division loves me, and it helps a lot when I don't know what the hell is going on in terms of administrative details.

[Anonymous User]

Flaaaamee

Believe what you want. It happened. No real way for me to prove it to you I suppose because for obvious reasons I cant give too many details on the internet.

I don't get why everyone is calling flame. This kind of thing has definitely happened at my firm, and I'm sure will happen again. And in my experience, it's the partner people are disgusted with when it comes out, not the SA.

The partners should be disgusted because it puts them in a very bad position. Neither the female partners nor the male partners should be having sex with summer associates at the firm. That said, it isn't a good career move for the SA either. People will find out for sure, people having sex are never as discrete as they think they are being. The other partners will always think of SA as the guy who had sex with one of the partners. An affair happening in the office isn't something people forget.

I didn't by any means recommend it, I'm just pointing out that office romances are rather common, and sometimes there's a pretty large age gap. Just because it's an absolutely horrible idea doesn't mean it's uncommon.

[die Zauberflote]

My father, instead of clerking, decided to work construction renovating the sewers at Ft. Knox. He was literally waste deep in shit every day. He slept in a tent the entire summer. Every night he would awake to the squirms of a knotted mass of snakes that had crawled underneath his tent to bask in the body heat radiating from his back. All this because it paid more per hour than clerking.

[rocon7383]

My father, instead of clerking, decided to work construction renovating the sewers at Ft. Knox. He was literally waste deep in shit every day. He slept in a tent the entire summer. Every night he would awake to the squirms of a knotted mass of snakes that had crawled underneath his tent to bask in the body heat radiating from his back. All this because it paid more per hour than clerking.

ok.

[dresden doll]

Male SA. Had sex with a female partner during my first week on the job. Basically, she's a super hot milf, we had a summer event, she seemed to be flirting with me, I made a move. Wish I could give more details

I don't think it was retarded, and I certainly don't regret it; the sex was good, and it continued throughout my SA. Don't think anyone knew/knows, but I guess we'll find out when offers come out in a few months?

If you don't think it was retarded, why did you share it ITT?

[Kretzy]

This is credited. I can't work 10% of the office equipment, but I found out quick who did so that I can go to them when I'm helpless and confused.

It's so key to befriend the office personnel. The secretary in my division loves me, and it helps a lot when I don't know what the hell is going on in terms of administrative details.

This. I'm 1/10 as useful as a paralegal, and 1/20 as useful as my incredibly helpful secretary, who has been with the firm for 20 years. People who treat office personnel poorly deserve their no-offer.

[Anonymous User]

Male SA. Had sex with a female partner during my first week on the job. Basically, she's a super hot milf, we had a summer event, she seemed to be flirting with me, I made a move. Wish I could give more details

I don't think it was retarded, and I certainly don't regret it; the sex was good, and it continued throughout my SA. Don't think anyone knew/knows, but I guess we'll find out when offers come out in a few months?

If you don't think it was retarded, why did you share it ITT?

Seemed like the thread had essentially become a funny things summer associates do thread. Thought the story was interesting. I mean just because I don't think it was retarded doesn't mean someone else might not. I'm just comfortable knowing that I did exactly what I wanted to do, and I don't mind accepting the potential consequences of my decision.

[paratactical]

This is credited. I can't work 10% of the office equipment, but I found out quick who did so that I can go to them when I'm helpless and confused.

This is 75% of the most stressful shit I deal with. I found someone trying to jam paper in the wrong side of a huge printer last week because they thought that was how they faxed something.