"If I didn't like the kid, I'd report his ass to anyone and everyone who'd listen. People like him suck balls and I doubt that this is isolated behavior. Screw his ass over ASAP and teach him a lesson. Shit, PM me, and I'll do it (really, I'd love to)." As he typed this, jdhonest absent-mindedly wiped his right hand on his pant leg, brushing away Cheeto crumbs before drawing a dirty napkin across his sweaty brow. Glancing up at his framed copy of Batman #3, the law school hopeful swore once again he would be a vengeful shadow in the night, an avatar of brute justice. jdhonest thought back on his own childhood humiliations, losing fights with the bully from the all-girls elementary school down the street, and the others who had wronged him in the past 21 years. Though he he never mustered the bravery to confront his perceived tormentors head on, he found himself a modern-day batcave in his mother's basement. His batmobile? A wireless modem. jdhonest smiled wryly to himself as he imagined the witty statements of his imaginary butler, with whom he would have a valuable friendship characterized by mutual respect and compassion. This was all fantasy, of course, as no voice had pierced the veil of that room except his own in many years. But it was still nice to pretend.
Turning his attention back to the Gotham-like streets of top-law-schools, our hero congratulated himself on his bravery and strength of character. "I have given these people hope in a world otherwise characterized by deceit," he thought to himself. Perhaps instead of emailing admissions, he would steal onto their windowsill in the night and warn them of their applicant pool danger in a gruff voice. "Of course," though jdhonest, "I'd need some sort of grappling hook." He resolved to check this month's spy equipment catalog as soon as it arrived in the mail and his mother brought it to his room.