Critique my addendum? Forum
- blank403
- Posts: 78
- Joined: Wed Mar 23, 2011 10:18 am
Critique my addendum?
submitting. thanks!
Last edited by blank403 on Sun Oct 23, 2011 12:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- thelawschoolproject
- Posts: 1364
- Joined: Thu Jun 23, 2011 12:58 am
Re: Critique my addendum?
I think you're good to go. It's to the point, which is what most schools prefer.
- AntipodeanPhil
- Posts: 1352
- Joined: Fri Apr 08, 2011 7:02 pm
Re: Critique my addendum?
Of course it won't be an issue - you're (presumably) no longer underage.blank403 wrote: I do not see this being an issue if accepted to your law school.
You should delete that sentence. IMO, you should also do a little more to describe what happened - you don't want them to assume the worse. For example: was the probation for one instance of underage drinking, or more than one?
The issue with something like this is that it calls into doubt your ability or willingness to follow the rules - university rules, professional standards, laws, et cetera. You might say something to indicate you understand that, and to explain why that won't be an issue.
Of course, I doubt schools care about one citation for underage drinking, so this probably won't make any difference either way.
- bernaldiaz
- Posts: 1674
- Joined: Sun Apr 24, 2011 12:51 am
Re: Critique my addendum?
I'd also use campus residences instead of dorm, or maybe dormitory? Idk it just sounds a bit too casual
-
- Posts: 1115
- Joined: Tue Jul 12, 2011 9:44 pm
Re: Critique my addendum?
+1bernaldiaz wrote:I'd also use campus residences instead of dorm, or maybe dormitory? Idk it just sounds a bit too casual
Want to continue reading?
Register now to search topics and post comments!
Absolutely FREE!
Already a member? Login
- theadvancededit
- Posts: 315
- Joined: Sun Aug 28, 2011 1:31 pm
Re: Critique my addendum?
I would broaden your closing sentence to include all disciplinary measures, to tie it off. "I do not foresee this, or any other disciplinary actions, as being of issue in the future."
-
- Posts: 92
- Joined: Mon Mar 07, 2011 5:21 am
Re: Critique my addendum?
'residence hall' instead of 'dorm', id say.
- blank403
- Posts: 78
- Joined: Wed Mar 23, 2011 10:18 am
Re: Critique my addendum?
submitting.
Last edited by blank403 on Sun Oct 23, 2011 12:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.
- AntipodeanPhil
- Posts: 1352
- Joined: Fri Apr 08, 2011 7:02 pm
Re: Critique my addendum?
Oh - perhaps vagueness is better then.blank403 wrote:I was caught drinking more than once, but only placed on probation once. I can't really say it was a one time thing. I don't know how much more detail I can add without making it worse.
IMO, this is better overall.
I would change "the residence hall" to "a residence hall," change "error and consequence" to "lapses in judgment and their consequences," and delete the sentence after that.
If you choose not to delete the second to last sentence, you should rephrase it. Why, for example, is it all in the past tense - is that no longer the case?
- blank403
- Posts: 78
- Joined: Wed Mar 23, 2011 10:18 am
Re: Critique my addendum?
thanks everyone.
Last edited by blank403 on Sun Oct 23, 2011 12:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
-
- Posts: 11413
- Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2010 4:54 pm
Re: Critique my addendum?
The original version is better, in my opinion.
Register now!
Resources to assist law school applicants, students & graduates.
It's still FREE!
Already a member? Login