Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

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swilson215
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby swilson215 » Thu Jun 30, 2011 1:07 am

Montevillian wrote:
Verity wrote:
zonto wrote:Sounds like a line right from the next Legally Blonde...


My favorite is when I'll complain about her being stubborn over something, and she'll eventually relent with "Pff, whatever girl, if it pleases the fuckin' courts..."

I like the plural aspect.

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

MAKE this girl get a TLS account. PLEASE!


yes. just...yes.

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Verity
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Verity » Thu Jun 30, 2011 8:36 am

Just as good, she blurts out "the defense rests, bitch!" with a few whoop-whoops afterward. She equates this phrase with "fuck yeah!"

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kwais
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby kwais » Thu Jun 30, 2011 8:53 am

Verity wrote:Just as good, she blurts out "the defense rests, bitch!" with a few whoop-whoops afterward. She equates this phrase with "fuck yeah!"


Someone please give her a reality TV show

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bjsesq
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby bjsesq » Thu Jun 30, 2011 9:19 am

Verity wrote:Just as good, she blurts out "the defense rests, bitch!" with a few whoop-whoops afterward. She equates this phrase with "fuck yeah!"


Your recent additions have convinced me this woman doesn't exist.

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Verity
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Verity » Thu Jun 30, 2011 9:37 am

bjsesq wrote:
Verity wrote:Just as good, she blurts out "the defense rests, bitch!" with a few whoop-whoops afterward. She equates this phrase with "fuck yeah!"


Your recent additions have convinced me this woman doesn't exist.


Always the cynic. You're too elitist.

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bjsesq
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby bjsesq » Thu Jun 30, 2011 9:40 am

Verity wrote:
bjsesq wrote:
Verity wrote:Just as good, she blurts out "the defense rests, bitch!" with a few whoop-whoops afterward. She equates this phrase with "fuck yeah!"


Your recent additions have convinced me this woman doesn't exist.


Always the cynic. You're too elitist. Stop calling me out, I'm having fun with this.


And... fixed.

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Verity
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Verity » Thu Jun 30, 2011 9:44 am

bjsesq wrote:
Verity wrote:
bjsesq wrote:
Verity wrote:Just as good, she blurts out "the defense rests, bitch!" with a few whoop-whoops afterward. She equates this phrase with "fuck yeah!"


Your recent additions have convinced me this woman doesn't exist.


Always the cynic. You're too elitist. Stop calling me out, I'm having fun with this.


And... fixed.


I'm willing to believe that's actually you in your 'tar.

NotEnuff
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby NotEnuff » Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:25 pm

this thread was the most amusing 10 min of my day...

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Verity
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Verity » Thu Jun 30, 2011 10:10 pm

Really, I feel like such a shit, talking about her on the internet. My main purpose was to get advice about how to persuade her not to pursue law, and I haven't gotten anything helpful, besides a good laugh.

The only hopeful sign is that she's been watching Shark Tank a lot. Maybe she'll opt for being an inventor.

This afternoon, she hooked up with one of her co-workers at K-mart. I'm worried because I think this dude is underage. I asked her about that, and she was like "pff, girl, let them fuckin TAKE ME TO COURT!" Whoop-whoop!

Ugh.

071816
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby 071816 » Thu Jun 30, 2011 10:15 pm

Verity wrote:Really, I feel like such a shit, talking about her on the internet. My main purpose was to get advice about how to persuade her not to pursue law, and I haven't gotten anything helpful, besides a good laugh.

The only hopeful sign is that she's been watching Shark Tank a lot. Maybe she'll opt for being an inventor.

This afternoon, she hooked up with one of her co-workers at K-mart. I'm worried because I think this dude is underage. I asked her about that, and she was like "pff, girl, let them fuckin TAKE ME TO COURT!" Whoop-whoop!

Ugh.


Jesus....

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seancris
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby seancris » Fri Jul 01, 2011 1:35 pm

If she's real, and she doesn't end up going to law school I guarantee you that she will fuck her life up in some other way.

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Hippononymous
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Hippononymous » Fri Jul 01, 2011 1:53 pm

Helicio wrote:Is it possible to score a 138 without being mentally deficient in some major way? I mean that's only 18 points over the lowest possible score (120).

Like I know that sounds mean, but HOLY @#$& I don't know anyone with that low of a score. Heck, I think I could score that on a PT after 3 days of no sleep, 10 bottles in, and with a hot girl suckin' on it.

Still verifying the math on this. Give me a few minutes.

blehGPAgoodLSAT
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby blehGPAgoodLSAT » Fri Jul 01, 2011 6:13 pm

This thread is gold.

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Hippononymous
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Hippononymous » Fri Jul 01, 2011 10:09 pm

Hippononymous wrote:
Helicio wrote:Is it possible to score a 138 without being mentally deficient in some major way? I mean that's only 18 points over the lowest possible score (120).

Like I know that sounds mean, but HOLY @#$& I don't know anyone with that low of a score. Heck, I think I could score that on a PT after 3 days of no sleep, 10 bottles in, and with a hot girl suckin' on it.

Still verifying the math on this. Give me a few minutes.

Upon further consideration, I have determined that your math is indeed correct. Continue.

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Verity
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Verity » Sat Jul 02, 2011 1:50 am

Update: She's been hanging out with that co-worker she hooked up with at Kmart. Turns out his second cousin or something is in law school (EC lower T1). She's coming back with all these encouraging anecdotes about how he's already making millions, and how easy law school is. The ensuing conversation:

"Wait a sec, there's no way this kid is making anywhere near that right now. And law school isn't easy, it's very, very competitive."

"Yeah, well I'm gonna tear that ass up in law school! Booyah!"

"That kid's exaggerating."

"Oh yeah?! Then what the fuck are you doin trying to get your school on?"

"Yeah, but I'm realistic about it..."

"Girl whateva, tell it to the judge."


Yup.

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driftwood6
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby driftwood6 » Sat Jul 02, 2011 10:36 am

At first, you had me. Now I feel ashamed for believing you. Carry on though. I would like to see more fictitious updates. It's entertaining

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Verity
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Verity » Sun Jul 03, 2011 2:25 pm

driftwood6 wrote:At first, you had me. Now I feel ashamed for believing you. Carry on though. I would like to see more fictitious updates. It's entertaining


I'm not up to arguing the existence of anonymous people.

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Montevillian
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Montevillian » Sun Jul 03, 2011 4:28 pm

I don't even care if this girl is real, please tell me more. I'm imagining Snookie saying all these things and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. :lol:

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cinephile
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby cinephile » Sun Jul 03, 2011 4:41 pm

I don't have much to add except to say that I sympathize. I have a friend with similar school choices (although much higher scores) and nothing I say will get through to her. I only tried twice though, because nagging her about it will only alienate her. If she wants to make a mistake, then that's on her now and you've done your best. Although it doesn't sound like your friend is in any danger of actually getting accepted.

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Verity
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Verity » Sun Jul 03, 2011 10:17 pm

cinephile wrote:I don't have much to add except to say that I sympathize. I have a friend with similar school choices (although much higher scores) and nothing I say will get through to her. I only tried twice though, because nagging her about it will only alienate her. If she wants to make a mistake, then that's on her now and you've done your best. Although it doesn't sound like your friend is in any danger of actually getting accepted.


Her not being able to get accepted is not really a source of solace, because she's wasting a lot of time. Even if she had the grades and the score, I'd say that her conception of the legal world is so warped that she'd be disappointed, and probably end up in financial ruin.

But she's kind of is messed up financially now anyway. Like I said, she's at Kmart, part-time, and even that's hanging by a thread. I think the only reason she hasn't been fired is because the manager is worried about a lawsuit (he's kind of flirty sometimes, and some of the co-workers think they're hooking up). Anyway, she took out serious loans for college. I'm surprised she even went to college. That took six years, $150K, four boyfriends, one false-alarm pregnancy, and a whole lot of SoCo.

And she kept getting side-tracked by that stupid rapper craze. She got booed off the stage at a local pub, but that's her fault for picking a spot where alternative rock bands usually play. I want to be supportive, but she wasn't that good. And she's too cute to be a rapper, so the whole thing was awkward. Going by the name "G-Spot" was also kind of awkward.

Worst of all is her temper. Sooner or later, she fights with every single person she knows or meets. She tends to get away with getting physical because she's a girl (especially with guys, because I'll admit, they think she's pretty). The other day, her boss asked her to help some customers in the athletic department because she's "good at getting physical," and she was like, "yo, I'ma show you physical," and socked him real hard in the ribs. She was in his office for a good ten minutes (according to one of her cashier co-workers), and everyone assumed they were having sex.

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robotclubmember
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby robotclubmember » Sun Jul 03, 2011 10:22 pm

Verity wrote:
cinephile wrote:I don't have much to add except to say that I sympathize. I have a friend with similar school choices (although much higher scores) and nothing I say will get through to her. I only tried twice though, because nagging her about it will only alienate her. If she wants to make a mistake, then that's on her now and you've done your best. Although it doesn't sound like your friend is in any danger of actually getting accepted.


Her not being able to get accepted is not really a source of solace, because she's wasting a lot of time. Even if she had the grades and the score, I'd say that her conception of the legal world is so warped that she'd be disappointed, and probably end up in financial ruin.

But she's kind of is messed up financially now anyway. Like I said, she's at Kmart, part-time, and even that's hanging by a thread. I think the only reason she hasn't been fired is because the manager is worried about a lawsuit (he's kind of flirty sometimes, and some of the co-workers think they're hooking up). Anyway, she took out serious loans for college. I'm surprised she even went to college. That took six years, $150K, four boyfriends, one false-alarm pregnancy, and a whole lot of SoCo.

And she kept getting side-tracked by that stupid rapper craze. She got booed off the stage at a local pub, but that's her fault for picking a spot where alternative rock bands usually play. I want to be supportive, but she wasn't that good. And she's too cute to be a rapper, so the whole thing was awkward. Going by the name "G-Spot" was also kind of awkward.

Worst of all is her temper. Sooner or later, she fights with every single person she knows or meets. She tends to get away with getting physical because she's a girl (especially with guys, because I'll admit, they think she's pretty). The other day, her boss asked her to help some customers in the athletic department because she's "good at getting physical," and she was like, "yo, I'ma show you physical," and socked him real hard in the ribs. She was in his office for a good ten minutes (according to one of her cashier co-workers), and everyone assumed they were having sex.


If she's real, just so you know, I have a stock pile of Four Loko and I'll donate it to you to give to her if you can videotape her beating someone up afterwards and show us. That's the only way I'll believe any of this.

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Verity
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Verity » Sun Jul 03, 2011 10:24 pm

robotclubmember wrote:If she's real, just so you know, I have a stock pile of Four Loko and I'll donate it to you to give to her if you can videotape her beating someone up afterwards and show us. That's the only way I'll believe any of this.


The last thing she needs is Four Loko.

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Verity
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Verity » Sun Jul 03, 2011 11:26 pm

Just to add, she finally picked a major in her last year of college, and it was anthropology. She said it's the "root of all answers" or something, which I'm sure she picked up from some random loser.

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bouakedojo
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby bouakedojo » Sun Jul 03, 2011 11:50 pm

.
Last edited by bouakedojo on Sat Aug 20, 2011 12:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Verity
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Re: Cooley or Hamline? RESULTS IN (Bottom Page 3)

Postby Verity » Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:56 pm

I had a talk with her this morning about career prospects. She started off defensively, with "well, what you wanna do?" I responded by indicating an interest in corporate law at a large firm.

After 30 seconds of explanation, she began to explain her career goals. "First, I'm gonna be tappin Zack!" This is a Franklin & Bash reference. I pressed her to be serious, then she said "Yeah, well after school I'll work on Wall Street and the Supreme Court. That's where Rico [her new boy toy] says the money's at."

While this is patently absurd for SCOTUS, let's not distract ourselves from the wilder assumptions here. Unless she's really a secret genius, and has found some new, profitable scheme that combines I-banking and writs of certiorari or something, I don't even know how to respond properly. In reality, I responded by saying that I didn't understand, and that maybe she should think this through.

Apparently Rico Suave has thought it through already. According to him, the Supreme Court is a puppet of Wall Street, and you might as well benefit from the hypocrisy. They're actually both stunned that more people haven't done so.

Then we both literally argued over the fact that SCOTUS justices (that's right, not clerks, justices) have to be appointed, they're on till retirement, and that they can't be I-bankers at the same time. Her response? "Objection, bitch!! Ha, haaaaa!!"

I hope this works out.




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