PLEASE CRITIQUE

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lawgirl10
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Joined: Sun Dec 26, 2010 8:37 pm

PLEASE CRITIQUE

Postby lawgirl10 » Sat Jan 08, 2011 12:34 pm

Please critique my LSAT addendum addressing my 12 point score increase!!

I am writing to address my 12-point score increase between my October 2009 LSAT score of 153 and my December 2010 LSAT score of 165. The first time I took the exam, I was not placed at the testing center of my choice. I underestimated the stress that would accompany finding my testing location in New York City, and I feel this, coupled with test day anxiety, negatively impacted my score. I feel that my December 2010 score is a more accurate indication of my abilities and a better reflection of my aptitude as a future law school student.

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JennBNYC
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Re: PLEASE CRITIQUE

Postby JennBNYC » Sat Jan 08, 2011 12:41 pm

Just playing devil's advocate, but why didn't you try to find the center before test day?

Your statement reads a little like you're blaming others (I didn't get what I asked for) and a bit whiny. I completely understand that those are legit things that could have thrown you off, but it reads a little bratty.

lawgirl10
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Re: PLEASE CRITIQUE

Postby lawgirl10 » Sat Jan 08, 2011 1:14 pm

Definitely see your point of view. I thought by saying "I underestimated..." that it wouldn't be 'blaming others', and rather taking responsibility for my oversight.

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JennBNYC
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Re: PLEASE CRITIQUE

Postby JennBNYC » Sat Jan 08, 2011 1:29 pm

I agree that the "I underestimated..." statement isn't blaming others, I meant the "I didn't get the center of my choice" part.

Maybe if you said something like: "The first time I took the exam I was placed at a center in an unfamiliar area. Unfortunately, I was unable to visit the center before the test day. I underestimated the stress......"

lawgirl10
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Joined: Sun Dec 26, 2010 8:37 pm

Re: PLEASE CRITIQUE

Postby lawgirl10 » Sat Jan 08, 2011 1:45 pm

I think you're right. Thanks for the feedback!!

lawgirl10
Posts: 35
Joined: Sun Dec 26, 2010 8:37 pm

Re: PLEASE CRITIQUE

Postby lawgirl10 » Sat Jan 08, 2011 3:08 pm

I am writing to address my 12-point score increase between my October 2009 LSAT score of 153 and my December 2010 LSAT score of 165. The first time I took the exam, I was not placed at the testing center of my choice, and I was not able to visit the center prior to my exam. I underestimated the stress that would accompany finding my testing location in New York City, and I feel this oversight, coupled with test day anxiety, negatively impacted my score. I feel that my December 2010 score is a more accurate indication of my abilities and a better reflection of my aptitude as a future law school student.


Does this look better?? I need some more feedback!!

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JennBNYC
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Re: PLEASE CRITIQUE

Postby JennBNYC » Sat Jan 08, 2011 4:56 pm

Looks much better to me :-)

emmbar53
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Re: PLEASE CRITIQUE

Postby emmbar53 » Sat Jan 08, 2011 5:08 pm

lawgirl10 wrote:I am writing to address my 12-point score increase between my October 2009 LSAT score of 153 and my December 2010 LSAT score of 165. The first time I took the exam, I was not placed at the testing center of my choice, and I was not able to visit the center prior to my exam. I underestimated the stress that would accompany finding my testing location in New York City, and I feel this oversight, coupled with test day anxiety, negatively impacted my score. I feel that my December 2010 score is a more accurate indication of my abilities and a better reflection of my aptitude as a future law school student.


Does this look better?? I need some more feedback!!


A couple minor points. You could remove the second comma in your second sentence along with the "I" so that it reads "The first time I took the exam, I was not placed at the testing center of my choice and was not able to visit the center prior to my exam."

Also, in your last two sentences, you might wanna say "believe" instead of "feel," as the object of the verb is a proposition.

These are minor points, though. Overall, I think the addendum looks good.




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