GPA Addendum - Sample Forum

[hotdog123]

LOL @ the OP retreating from this thread.

I needed a good laughing this morning, thanks.

[recaldo]

Yup, this was USDA prime.

Also, Janus: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15223650/

Ugh. It says the link is broken. What did I miss?

This work? http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/10/11/plane.crash/index.html

Wow. Clearly, I didn't get that from reading his statement. I just assumed he was talking about 911 and his building was one of the casualties of that disaster. Just another reason why it needs to be revised.

That's because you didn't read closely enough. It says <address of building>. Also it talks about a plane. You just connected it in your head.

[d34d9823]

That's because you didn't read closely enough. It says <address of building>. Also it talks about a plane. You just connected it in your head. I am so sick of interacting with genuine idiots on this fucking board.

Dude, there's a reason writing is known as a *communication* skill. I don't think anyone got a clear picture of what you were talking about from your essay. To blame that on our reading comprehension is pretty disingenuous. People are willing to help you, but you're not going to become a better writer until you realize that your current writing sucks.

[Bert]

LOL @ the OP retreating from this thread.

I needed a good laughing this morning, thanks.

There is another TLSer who did/does the same thing -- claimed he/she consistently deleted all his/her posts after the thread was over.

[recaldo]

That's because you didn't read closely enough. It says <address of building>. Also it talks about a plane. You just connected it in your head. I am so sick of interacting with genuine idiots on this fucking board.

Dude, there's a reason writing is known as a *communication* skill. I don't think anyone got a clear picture of what you were talking about from your essay. To blame that on our reading comprehension is pretty disingenuous. People are willing to help you, but you're not going to become a better writer until you realize that your current writing sucks.

LOL. I'm a bad writer because she assumes every plane crashing into a building was 9/11.

[Bildungsroman]

That's because you didn't read closely enough. It says <address of building>. Also it talks about a plane. You just connected it in your head. I am so sick of interacting with genuine idiots on this fucking board.

Dude, there's a reason writing is known as a *communication* skill. I don't think anyone got a clear picture of what you were talking about from your essay. To blame that on our reading comprehension is pretty disingenuous. People are willing to help you, but you're not going to become a better writer until you realize that your current writing sucks.

LOL. I'm a bad writer because she assumes every plane crashing into a building was 9/11.

No, you're a bad writer because your writing is terrible.

[Bert]

That's because you didn't read closely enough. It says <address of building>. Also it talks about a plane. You just connected it in your head. I am so sick of interacting with genuine idiots on this fucking board.

To be honest, when I finally caved and read your addendum, I thought the same thing -- that you were referring to the WTC, which has an "<address of building>" and was hit by a plane. Granted, it was a bigger plane than the one that crashed into the Belaire Condominiums at 524 E. 72nd Street (which is apparently the building to which you are referring). Anyway, I can definitely see how people who are not from New York could mistake your writing for referring the WTC. I am in NYC and was confused initially. You could have done better, especially if you are as good a writer as you believe yourself to be.

[ScaredWorkedBored]

On the off chance the OP actually is for real, he needs to learn what legal writing is and stop trying to write bizarre literature prose. The purpose of this sort of thing is to communicate information, not have interpretation discussed 200 years later in some lit class.

[Janus]

That's because you didn't read closely enough. It says <address of building>. Also it talks about a plane. You just connected it in your head. I am so sick of interacting with genuine idiots on this fucking board.

Dude, there's a reason writing is known as a *communication* skill. I don't think anyone got a clear picture of what you were talking about from your essay. To blame that on our reading comprehension is pretty disingenuous. People are willing to help you, but you're not going to become a better writer until you realize that your current writing sucks.

LOL. I'm a bad writer because she assumes every plane crashing into a building was 9/11.

I shouldn't have had to assume. It should have been clear. Generally, when you write something, you want your readers to understand what you are talking about. Also, planes crashing into buildings in NYC = 911 for most people. If you had said you lived in Buffalo and a plane crashed into your house, then I would have known you weren't talking about 911. Planes crash into buildings/houses a few times a year in the U.S. But, they don't crash into buildings too often in NYC.

I'm pretty sure we all think you're an idiot, too. Insulting people is pretty juvenile. When you ask for critisms, expect people to criticize, including saying things like "It's not very well written," or, "It's crap." These are not insults; they are criticims. Clearly, you are unable to differentiate between the two.

[recaldo]

That's because you didn't read closely enough. It says <address of building>. Also it talks about a plane. You just connected it in your head. I am so sick of interacting with genuine idiots on this fucking board.

Dude, there's a reason writing is known as a *communication* skill. I don't think anyone got a clear picture of what you were talking about from your essay. To blame that on our reading comprehension is pretty disingenuous. People are willing to help you, but you're not going to become a better writer until you realize that your current writing sucks.

LOL. I'm a bad writer because she assumes every plane crashing into a building was 9/11.

I shouldn't have had to assume. It should have been clear. Generally, when you write something, you want your readers to understand what you are talking about. Also, planes crashing into buildings in NYC = 911 for most people. If you had said you lived in Buffalo and a plane crashed into your house, then I would have known you weren't talking about 911. Planes crash into buildings/houses a few times a year in the U.S. But, they don't crash into buildings too often in NYC.

I'm pretty sure we all think you're an idiot, too. Insulting people is pretty juvenile. When you ask for critisms, expect people to criticize, including saying things like "It's not very well written," or, "It's crap." These are not insults; they are criticims. Clearly, you are unable to differentiate between the two.

Not an issue - the address of the building is no where near the WTC. The name of the building is nowhere near. And I said only two people died. Is that enough for you to figure out its not WTC? Read closer.

[ScaredWorkedBored]

Read closer.

You're really not getting the point here, are you?

[recaldo]

That's because you didn't read closely enough. It says <address of building>. Also it talks about a plane. You just connected it in your head. I am so sick of interacting with genuine idiots on this fucking board.

Dude, there's a reason writing is known as a *communication* skill. I don't think anyone got a clear picture of what you were talking about from your essay. To blame that on our reading comprehension is pretty disingenuous. People are willing to help you, but you're not going to become a better writer until you realize that your current writing sucks.

LOL. I'm a bad writer because she assumes every plane crashing into a building was 9/11.

I shouldn't have had to assume. It should have been clear. Generally, when you write something, you want your readers to understand what you are talking about. Also, planes crashing into buildings in NYC = 911 for most people. If you had said you lived in Buffalo and a plane crashed into your house, then I would have known you weren't talking about 911. Planes crash into buildings/houses a few times a year in the U.S. But, they don't crash into buildings too often in NYC.

I'm pretty sure we all think you're an idiot, too. Insulting people is pretty juvenile. When you ask for critisms, expect people to criticize, including saying things like "It's not very well written," or, "It's crap." These are not insults; they are criticims. Clearly, you are unable to differentiate between the two.

I do not think these are insults from you guys at all. I think they are criticisms. I'm sorry you can't handle retorts to your criticisms. I'm sorry attempting to defend my work is so ridiculous in the presence of all these long-term TLSers who REALLY know what's going on.

[recaldo]

Read closer.

You're really not getting the point here, are you?

I get it. Rewrite the addendum. And I will do that by tonight for you all to read.

[d34d9823]

Just so everyone knows what this is all about...

My poor undergraduate performance was something of my own making and I take full responsibility for the bad academic choices I made while at <top 10 school>. As the LSAT shows, there is a distinction between correlation and causation and, as far as I know, we are still working on the causes of human behavior. It has taken over four years of deep self-reflection, eights years of temporal distance from events, and an everlasting, if naïve, belief that terrible events can be explained, examined, and can lead to a conclusion about one’s personhood in order to write this GPA Addendum. This is my best explanation of the circumstances surrounding my academic performance. It is not meant as an excuse. I offer it to the Admissions Committee for use as a partial explanation for my trajectory.

To be an orphan is to not know one’s roots or past. Between my Senior year of high school and my freshman year at college, a bread-winning member of my family developed a severe psychiatric disorder where she became violent. I was routinely abused physically, emotionally, and mentally. Police were present at my house often in response to violent acts. I was sometimes locked out of my house and forced to live outside during cold winters in makeshift bedding that I constructed myself. Other times, I was imprisoned, or handcuffed, for days at a time. School counselors and advisors, well-informed of a destabilized family situation due to the smallish nature of <small town> advised me not to attend college, rather they suggested that I “take a year off,” presumably because they knew I was too damaged to perform at <top 10 school>. I responded, “and stay where?” I was homeless in many ways – I could not count on shelter, on stability, or support. I could, however, count on violence, verbal explosions, and barbarism. Adding to the trauma, it was revealed that my brother, <name>, who never really looked like me, was not the product of my mother and my father, but rather my mother or my father! The intense fighting brought out the truth sixteen years after his birth, long after he was assumed to be of my blood.

Despite having a low GPA, <top 10 school> never asked me to leave and never asked me to take time off(the traditional method of dealing with low GPA students) because they were aware of the situation. I was, frankly, screwed up. But within two and half years I was already recovering. I received much higher grades between my _ and _ years, led student groups, and obtained competitive internships where I was offered full-time jobs.

But then, unfortunately, there was more trauma. CNN to see my apartment building in New York City in flames; the very apartment building I returned to between my years at <top 10 school>. The place I now called home. My refuge. A plane had crashed into <address in nyc>; right into the apartment where my father had moved to escape the same broken home I had escaped only years prior. It was a direct hit As I watched flames shoot out of the building on CNN, the camera panning to gawking pedestrians and desperate fire fighters, a sinking feeling came over me: I was homeless again. When I eventually returned to the building after the accident in which two people died and one was severely burned, I stood on the precipice of the gigantic hole the plane and explosion had formed on the <floor #> of the <building official title>, wind whipping in my hair, and the lights of the New York City skyline closer than ever before and realized that it was no different than any other time in my recent memory. I was living in a vacuum. The hole in the building was the hole I had felt since high school, the hole in my family life. The hole in my entire life.
This was the day when things turned. I had nothing but myself now and my experiences. I was a wounded orphan. But I’m over it.

[Always Credited]

Scrap the entire GPA addemdum; its clear that the OP is -still- fucking crazy.

[recaldo]

Scrap the entire GPA addemdum; its clear that the OP is -still- fucking crazy.

Never was crazy. Why do you think that?

[Always Credited]

Scrap the entire GPA addemdum; its clear that the OP is -still- fucking crazy.

Never was crazy. Why do you think that?

I read this thread.

[recaldo]

Scrap the entire GPA addemdum; its clear that the OP is -still- fucking crazy.

Never was crazy. Why do you think that?

I read this thread.

Defamation of character dude. You better stop.

[Always Credited]

Scrap the entire GPA addemdum; its clear that the OP is -still- fucking crazy.

Never was crazy. Why do you think that?

I read this thread.

Defamation of character dude. You better stop.

[clintonius]

'fraid I have to side with the OP re: the WTC assumption being the fault of the reader; however, OP, you actually wrote "<address of building>" instead of putting the address of the building in your statement. Nobody can be expected to know that the address is nowhere near the WTC if they don't know the address at all.

Also, the defamation of character accusation makes this whole thing look a lot like the thread kalvano linked to on page three.

[recaldo]

Gross.

[Always Credited]

Gross.

The poo is representative of your writing skills.

[recaldo]

Gross.

The poo is representative of your writing skills.

Funny that I wrote a famous book, and scored 99 percentile on every writing standardized test since 8th grade. However, it's clearly not the type of writing you want or even that admissions people want(apparently).

It is a personal style though. Sorry, man, but you lose at not being able to understand context. Please send me some good writing if you don't mind so I can see what good writing is in your opinion. I am interested in learning more about your opinion.

[d34d9823]

Funny that I wrote a famous book

The rest of this thread has at least been borderline believable, but now you're just making shit up.

[Janus]

'fraid I have to side with the OP re: the WTC assumption being the fault of the reader; however, OP, you actually wrote "<address of building>" instead of putting the address of the building in your statement. Nobody can be expected to know that the address is nowhere near the WTC if they don't know the address at all.

Also, the defamation of character accusation makes this whole thing look a lot like the thread kalvano linked to on page three.

Concur.