Admitted Student Days/Weekends Forum

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Helmholtz

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by Helmholtz » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:15 pm

I would also like to say that the reason I am against it is not because I care about my future classmates, what image I'm projecting, etc.

ASWs are for future law students and it's not going to be geared towards a family experience. I almost guarantee that you would regret bringing your parents along to an ASW, no question.

side note: have any of you guys been to an ASW or at least a part of one?

Pearalegal

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by Pearalegal » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:16 pm

Rand M. wrote: This is the most credited part. I think there is definitely some merit to trying things out on your own. But, again, I just don't see how someone else decision will affect your time. Their parents are not your safety net and will probably not interact with you to any degree.
I'm not stating my opinion because it will affect me. My parents won't be going, and I probably will only have a passing thought if I see other parents about.

But I honestly think a student bringing their parents along is doing a disservice to themselves.

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sarlis

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by sarlis » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:16 pm

Thanks for the info guys. I have been telling my parents that ASD/Ws are for students to get to know each other, and the professors and the school. I am not going to bring my parents.

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by Pearalegal » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:17 pm

sarlis wrote:Thanks for the info guys. I have been telling my parents that ASD/Ws are for students to get to know each other, and the professors and the school. I am not going to bring my parents.

Haha, you poor guy. You were asking such an innocent and simple question and got...all this.

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sarlis

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by sarlis » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:19 pm

Pearalegal wrote:
sarlis wrote:Thanks for the info guys. I have been telling my parents that ASD/Ws are for students to get to know each other, and the professors and the school. I am not going to bring my parents.

Haha, you poor guy. You were asking such an innocent and simple question and got...all this.
Haha, such is TLS!

Also, Helm, I have never been to a ASD/W, which is why I am asking :)

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ashleigh

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by ashleigh » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:20 pm

Helmholtz wrote:
ashleigh wrote:
DoubleChecks wrote:if they want to come and you dont mind, why does it matter?
+1
Because you will mind when you actually get there and see what's going on. It might sound nice in theory, but it just won't work well.
I know it wouldn't work well for me - I know I'd feel awkward and be worried about having to "babysit", that's why I personally would NOT want them coming.

but someone else might be aware of all these things and not mind at all. there are certain people in this world who just don't give a f*ck what other people think (more power to them).

sure, I might call my bf that night and say, "there was some dude here with his parents" but whatever, I still don't see a problem with it if someone truly doesn't mind them tagging along.

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Helmholtz

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by Helmholtz » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:21 pm

sarlis wrote: Haha, such is TLS!

Also, Helm, I have never been to a ASD/W, which is why I am asking :)
No, I know you haven't, and I think I asked the exact same question about a year ago that you did on here. It was a valid question.

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MC Southstar

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by MC Southstar » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:25 pm

Tch. It doesn't come down to what the culture of your family is. It matters what the culture of the classmates and faculty members that you are going to meet FOR THE FIRST TIME is. That American culture is one that favors independence, imo. If you honestly do not think it will reflect negatively on you if your parents tag along when they are just going to be extra baggage, then go ahead. I just don't think it's worth the extra stigma you risk in doing so. I also find it counterproductive to bring around comfort zones with you when you need to spread yourself around, but that doesn't apply to everyone.

Also, if your parents are just really outgoing and great conversationalists, doesn't hurt.

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violaboy

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by violaboy » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:26 pm

I didn't even think of bringing my parents. My Mom just tells me to go to law school in a city that's amusing so that she can have fun if she visits.

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lbeezy

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by lbeezy » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:26 pm

My response to this last year was ummmm a little more judgmental. A teensy bit.

However, now having been to them -- don't take your parents. Have them come in that weekend with you, and show them around separately, but don't take them to the admitted students stuff. Only a few people brought their parents and they just stood with their parents the entire time, didn't really interact with other people, and the parents for the most part dominated the question and answer stuff.

A lot of schools do prospective student tours the day before ASW/D's even. Take your parents to those. They can ask all the questions they want there, and it's perfectly appropriate for them to be there then.

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by Pearalegal » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:27 pm

shadowfrost000 wrote:Tch. It doesn't come down to what the culture of your family is. It matters what the culture of the classmates and faculty members that you are going to meet FOR THE FIRST TIME is. That American culture is one that favors independence, imo. If you honestly do not think it will reflect negatively on you if your parents tag along when they are just going to be extra baggage, then go ahead. I just don't think it's worth the extra stigma you risk in doing so. I also find it counterproductive to bring around comfort zones with you when you need to spread yourself around, but that doesn't apply to everyone.

Also, if your parents are just really outgoing and great conversationalists, doesn't hurt.

I should not have talked about the image it projects. Who really cares...its more that I think an adult heading to law school needs to be a grown up and do these things on their own.

I'd also argue that an outgoing and great conversationalist parents will only make things work. If you are going to bring your parents, it should be in a seen and not hear capacity.

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toolshed

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by toolshed » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:29 pm

lbeezy wrote:My response to this last year was ummmm a little more judgmental. A teensy bit.

However, now having been to them -- don't take your parents. Have them come in that weekend with you, and show them around separately, but don't take them to the admitted students stuff. Only a few people brought their parents and they just stood with their parents the entire time, didn't really interact with other people, and the parents for the most part dominated the question and answer stuff.

A lot of schools do prospective student tours the day before ASW/D's even. Take your parents to those. They can ask all the questions they want there, and it's perfectly appropriate for them to be there then.
Would you suggest the same with a SO? Mine will come with me, but I just assumed I would leave her to her own devices during the daytime, school-related activities. If there are nighttime social gatherings, I would guess it would be okay.

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by Pearalegal » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:31 pm

toolshed wrote:
Would you suggest the same with a SO? Mine will come with me, but I just assumed I would leave her to her own devices during the daytime, school-related activities. If there are nighttime social gatherings, I would guess it would be okay.
I think its a very good decision if SO will be moving with you. If not, my position remains the same.

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violaboy

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by violaboy » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:32 pm

Pearalegal wrote:
toolshed wrote:
Would you suggest the same with a SO? Mine will come with me, but I just assumed I would leave her to her own devices during the daytime, school-related activities. If there are nighttime social gatherings, I would guess it would be okay.
I think its a very good decision if SO will be moving with you. If not, my position remains the same.
This is what I'm doing.

ughOSU

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by ughOSU » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:37 pm

I would certainly be judging anyone who showed up with their parents...

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lbeezy

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by lbeezy » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:41 pm

toolshed wrote:
lbeezy wrote:My response to this last year was ummmm a little more judgmental. A teensy bit.

However, now having been to them -- don't take your parents. Have them come in that weekend with you, and show them around separately, but don't take them to the admitted students stuff. Only a few people brought their parents and they just stood with their parents the entire time, didn't really interact with other people, and the parents for the most part dominated the question and answer stuff.

A lot of schools do prospective student tours the day before ASW/D's even. Take your parents to those. They can ask all the questions they want there, and it's perfectly appropriate for them to be there then.
Would you suggest the same with a SO? Mine will come with me, but I just assumed I would leave her to her own devices during the daytime, school-related activities. If there are nighttime social gatherings, I would guess it would be okay.
Personally, I would put her to work during the day. Have her go check out apartments and stuff if she's going to be moving with you. But if she doesn't go for that, eh. I don't remember any SO's. But they would have been harder to spot, I guess. For nighttime stuff, it's obviously okay to bring her.

I think bringing your SO is different than bringing your parents. Especially if they're moving with you.

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YCrevolution

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by YCrevolution » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:46 pm

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MC Southstar

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by MC Southstar » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:49 pm

Regarding SO and the two things I said before. I don't think an SO really gives you a negative image necessarily. I also don't think they are as much of a social barrier, since they are probably the same age, and could easily be confused for another student. Just don't cling too much. :P

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by Pearalegal » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:51 pm

lbeezy wrote: Personally, I would put her to work during the day. Have her go check out apartments and stuff if she's going to be moving with you. But if she doesn't go for that, eh. I don't remember any SO's. But they would have been harder to spot, I guess. For nighttime stuff, it's obviously okay to bring her.

I think bringing your SO is different than bringing your parents. Especially if they're moving with you.
Lol, at the bolded because it made me smile and is true. When someone is moving in with you, I think its more acceptable (not to the school events though).

However...

I just don't think theres anything wrong with going on your own to everything (even the nighttime stuff) during ASWs. Your significant other is not going to be interracting with your peers everyday, and I hope you plan on spending some social time away from the significant other after law school starts too.

When I went through this for my bf's B school stuff, I made my boyfriend do things without me. I wanted him to make his own friends first, without me. Because it was going to be his school. His classmates. Sure I'd like to be friendly and get to know everyone...but after he did.
Last edited by Pearalegal on Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:54 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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The Zeppelin

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by The Zeppelin » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:53 pm

No parents. It's like bringing your mom to the first day of high school. People will judge you differently.

Just bring you.

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by D. H2Oman » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:55 pm

Pearalegal wrote:
When I went through this for my bf's B school stuff, I made my boyfriend do things without me. I wanted him to make his own friends first, without me. Because it was going to be his school. His classmates. Sure I'd like to be friendly and get to know everyone...but after he did.
This can't be true, this is exactly the opposite of what girlfriends do

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MC Southstar

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by MC Southstar » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:55 pm

Dwaterman86 wrote:
Pearalegal wrote:
When I went through this for my bf's B school stuff, I made my boyfriend do things without me. I wanted him to make his own friends first, without me. Because it was going to be his school. His classmates. Sure I'd like to be friendly and get to know everyone...but after he did.
This can't be true, this is exactly the opposite of what girlfriends do
Maybe she actually has a brain.

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sarlis

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by sarlis » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:57 pm

YCrevolution wrote:
sarlis wrote:Do parents typically go, or do students normally go by themselves? My parents would like to go to some, but I'd rather just go by myself / it is cheaper if I just go. I am trying to book a flights and need to know now many tickets to get. What has everyone typically done/typically seen done? Thanks!
Quite a few people brought parents to the UVA ASDs last year. I definitely did not.

I'll snicker if your parents come to the actual events with you.
Haha, they are NOT coming. just one plane ticket more me!
Last edited by sarlis on Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:58 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Pearalegal

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by Pearalegal » Wed Dec 23, 2009 5:57 pm

Dwaterman86 wrote:
Pearalegal wrote:
When I went through this for my bf's B school stuff, I made my boyfriend do things without me. I wanted him to make his own friends first, without me. Because it was going to be his school. His classmates. Sure I'd like to be friendly and get to know everyone...but after he did.
This can't be true, this is exactly the opposite of what girlfriends do
Thats...funny. I used to want to spend all my time with my high school boyfriend. Then I, you know, wasn't a high schooler anymore and got some self-confidence.

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Re: Admitted Student Days/Weekends

Post by 09042014 » Wed Dec 23, 2009 6:05 pm

ughOSU wrote:I would certainly be judging anyone who showed up with their parents...
Count me in for judging. We've all been adults for years.

Seriously? What are you waiting for?

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