Swapping personal statements

(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
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consummategamer
Posts: 5
Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2007 4:26 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby consummategamer » Tue Dec 16, 2008 7:30 pm

Severa wrote:Hi all,

if anyone is interested in swapping PS's I am really happy to help (at the small price, as Ken said, of your time looking over mine). Send me a PM and we can get started! :)


I'll trade, here's my "proud event" essay for W&M.

I took another swing with the hammer and finally dislodged the two by four. My hands stung, and tiny strands of fiberglass hung in the air, but I had cut and bashed a hole in the wall big enough for the washer and dryer hookups. It was none too soon; I felt I was about to suffocate under my mask and my goggles were fogged up again. I decided to go see how Grandma’s work progressed.
Unlike my dad, I am not a builder. I have always tended toward the bookish side, so I lack both the skills and the physique for serious manual labor. This is embarrassing to me because most of the men in my family do some kind of physical laborer. My grandpa has never found much use for me on his ranch, and to him, work means getting your hands dirty. I do not share his restricted view of creating value, but I take special pride whenever I get my hands dirty doing something useful.
Last summer my mom moved into a house needing renovation. She could not take time away from work, so I came to help her for a few weeks. I worked on my own tearing things down and under supervision when I could be of use to the contractors. When Grandma heard that my mom was living in an unfinished house, she came to join us. Though past seventy, she still can’t resist work that needs to be done. Together we made steady progress clearing the way for the professionals to get their jobs done.
I found Grandma tearing down the living room ceiling. She worked cheerfully, at an easy pace, but with the tireless assurance of someone who is well practiced at getting the job done. I grabbed the other step ladder and went to work on the opposite side of the room. We talked as the boards came down. My mom would be delighted to see how our efforts had transformed her house. I knew we were making good progress, but I craved recognition in addition to achievement. When Grandma said, “Grandpa will be so proud of you.” I knew it was true. They had both grown up in a farming community during the Great Depression and World War Two, so they held high standards for effort. That simple compliment symbolized a connection with my family and my roots.
I believe it is important to take pride in what you do well, but it is also important to do things that do not come easily. I know that I will never possess the craftsmanship of my father, or the stamina of my grandparents, but I can still share in the family tradition of working to make one another's lives better. I am proud of this event, not just because of the work I accomplished, but because I was able to share it with someone whose own accomplishments I have admired all my life.

User avatar
kimenaim
Posts: 5
Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2008 9:02 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby kimenaim » Thu Dec 18, 2008 2:52 pm

Seriously guys, I really need someone to give me some thoughts on my PS! Please PM me if you're willing to help me out!! Even if you don't have anything to swap, I'd appreciate you taking a look at mine.

Thanks!

CaitP
Posts: 5
Joined: Tue Sep 30, 2008 10:41 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby CaitP » Mon Dec 22, 2008 12:21 pm

Anyone want to trade? I like to think of myself as a pretty good editor...

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badlydrawn
Posts: 145
Joined: Sun Oct 05, 2008 12:11 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby badlydrawn » Mon Dec 22, 2008 10:22 pm

Alright. I've written most of my personal statement, and it has run over two pages double-spaced. Some of it needs to be fleshed out, other parts need striking out. As a splitter, my personal statement will need to retain some riskiness without being indulgent. I'd like to PM many people who can help me make it leaner, find the focal point of my PS, give it direction, and perhaps make some stylistic suggestions (I tend to be verbose) at this point in the process. The more constructive opinions the better. Please respond!

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badlydrawn
Posts: 145
Joined: Sun Oct 05, 2008 12:11 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby badlydrawn » Mon Dec 22, 2008 10:35 pm

I should add that I'm willing to edit your personal statement as well. I proofread and edited papers for others throughout college, and I think I'm pretty good at it. References available upon request.

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dholyghozt
Posts: 21
Joined: Tue Dec 02, 2008 11:31 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby dholyghozt » Tue Dec 23, 2008 7:29 pm

i'm up for trading...please email pm or email dholyghozt@gmail.com

Thanks!

buslaw4302
Posts: 58
Joined: Wed Dec 24, 2008 1:13 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby buslaw4302 » Wed Dec 24, 2008 1:15 am

I'd like to swap if anyone would like, pm me yours and I will do likewise

bentley IX
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Dec 25, 2008 4:21 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby bentley IX » Thu Dec 25, 2008 4:28 pm

Hi I have a personal statement and a diversity statement that need to be critiqued. They are getting closer and closer to completion and I hope have them done this week. I will trade with any competent writer/editor/forum crawler so shoot me an email!

randallel2687103@hotmail.com

gasquet08
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Aug 20, 2008 2:50 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby gasquet08 » Mon Dec 29, 2008 5:24 pm

Hi,

I'd like to swap my personal statment with someone. Please message me if you are interested.

thank you

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Rocky Estoppel
Posts: 283
Joined: Thu Jan 03, 2008 9:41 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby Rocky Estoppel » Tue Dec 30, 2008 5:40 pm

******
Last edited by Rocky Estoppel on Tue Jan 27, 2009 11:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.

eaw17
Posts: 1
Joined: Sat Nov 22, 2008 11:52 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby eaw17 » Fri Jan 02, 2009 11:14 pm

Anyone spending a quiet Friday night in, looking for a PS to read? It's my final (hopefully) edit so shouldn't be too tough. Am happy to read yours, too! Just PM me. thanks!

guypal
Posts: 11
Joined: Thu May 29, 2008 5:28 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby guypal » Sat Jan 03, 2009 1:47 pm

a quick swap anyone?

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carolinagirl0724
Posts: 8
Joined: Mon Sep 01, 2008 5:39 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby carolinagirl0724 » Sun Jan 04, 2009 5:01 pm

I am having trouble with my PS. The two schools I am applying to want some sort of "Why I want to attend law school/Overcoming Adversity" blend (or it can be diversity, etc.) I am trying to get a lot of ideas in, but it either runs over, or it just sounds mechanical.

Any advice?

sans1187
Posts: 2
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:34 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby sans1187 » Mon Jan 05, 2009 6:06 pm

heyy, if anyone wants to swap, please PM me!

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kimenaim
Posts: 5
Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2008 9:02 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby kimenaim » Wed Jan 07, 2009 1:50 am

Hi everyone,
I REALLY need your help in getting through my DS! I'd like to get apps out this week and need some feedback. I'm willing to swap, also (PS or DS).

Please PM me!
Last edited by kimenaim on Sat Jan 10, 2009 1:52 am, edited 1 time in total.

starting09
Posts: 3
Joined: Wed Jul 02, 2008 12:56 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby starting09 » Wed Jan 07, 2009 7:25 pm

Would anyone be willing to swap with me? I've made some edits to my PS and really need some feedback. Please just PM me and I will review and provide feedback rather quickly!

Thanks in advance.

jacksonhandy
Posts: 1
Joined: Sat Dec 20, 2008 8:14 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby jacksonhandy » Thu Jan 08, 2009 12:18 am

If someone wants to swap PS PM me or email me
Last edited by jacksonhandy on Mon Jan 19, 2009 8:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.

jr777
Posts: 2
Joined: Thu Jan 08, 2009 12:08 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby jr777 » Thu Jan 08, 2009 4:00 pm

Anyone willing to swap PS, I'm here too. I need as much help as possible, I need to get these applications out soon.

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Lizface killah
Posts: 149
Joined: Fri Oct 24, 2008 7:28 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby Lizface killah » Fri Jan 09, 2009 2:09 am

I just have one sentence that I hate. Anyone want to voice an opinion on my ps without having to read a lot? PM me.

jr777
Posts: 2
Joined: Thu Jan 08, 2009 12:08 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby jr777 » Sat Jan 10, 2009 2:38 am

Comepletely rewrote my statement and could really use some advice. I would gladly trade.

starting09
Posts: 3
Joined: Wed Jul 02, 2008 12:56 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby starting09 » Mon Jan 12, 2009 11:11 pm

Anybody good with grammar, punctuation, etc? I've gone over my ps a few times and need another set of eyes to make sure I didn't miss anything. I'd be happy to trade with someone. PM me.

Thanks.

supercard1999
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Jan 15, 2009 5:18 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby supercard1999 » Thu Jan 15, 2009 10:05 pm

ready to swap.

sbats
Posts: 1
Joined: Fri Jan 16, 2009 1:52 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby sbats » Fri Jan 16, 2009 2:02 pm

supercard1999 wrote:ready to swap.


me too. My email is sbats13@gmail.com. Send it over whenever you get a chance and I'll send mine back. =)

starting09
Posts: 3
Joined: Wed Jul 02, 2008 12:56 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby starting09 » Sun Jan 25, 2009 6:59 am

I have a very personal "Overcoming Adversity" statement that I need an opinion on. I need to know if it's too heavy or not. Please PM me if you are willing to take a look and provide feedback. I'm looking for relatively quick turnaround, so if you'd be so kind as to pm me only if you can provide relatively quick (and constructive) feedback, I'd GREATLY appreciate it. I'd be willing to trade if necessary.

Thanks.

buslaw4302
Posts: 58
Joined: Wed Dec 24, 2008 1:13 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby buslaw4302 » Tue Jan 27, 2009 11:22 pm

Just redid my personal statement for the 9,957th time and I would really appreciate it if someone has time to take a look! PM me if youd like to trade or have a few minutes to go through mine, thanks!




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