Swapping personal statements

(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
LSATclincher
Posts: 476
Joined: Mon Nov 30, 2009 12:09 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby LSATclincher » Thu Mar 03, 2011 8:04 pm

Willing to swap tonight. I need a critique of 2 scholarship essays, but I'll just trade one of them, so you don't have to read too much.

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SherlockHolmes
Posts: 327
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2011 2:47 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby SherlockHolmes » Fri Mar 04, 2011 9:29 pm

If interested, I'm more than happy to help anyone out. Just PM me your personal statement and I'll get it back to you in a timely matter.

Mrs.Law
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Mar 10, 2011 5:45 am

PM if you want to swap

Postby Mrs.Law » Thu Mar 10, 2011 5:52 am

I would love to review and need someone to review my PS.

Ashleys110
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed Feb 23, 2011 4:34 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby Ashleys110 » Mon Mar 14, 2011 3:59 pm

I'm also very happy to edit for anybody! PM me

Lovely_08
Posts: 2
Joined: Thu Mar 31, 2011 3:25 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby Lovely_08 » Thu Mar 31, 2011 3:43 am

First-time poster, here =)

I'm willing to read any and all statements (e.g., personal, diversity, LOCI, etc.) in exchange for your reviewing of my personal statement. As an aside, I send edits back quickly and will be checking my inbox periodically throughout day. Thanks!

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icecold3000
Posts: 213
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Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby icecold3000 » Fri May 06, 2011 12:14 pm

PM me for a swap . . .

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Samara
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Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby Samara » Mon Jun 20, 2011 5:02 pm

Happy to review your PS. Just send me a PM.

blehGPAgoodLSAT
Posts: 57
Joined: Mon Jun 06, 2011 3:14 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby blehGPAgoodLSAT » Mon Jun 27, 2011 12:34 pm

jpritchett5 wrote:I am getting raped this cycle. Although it is a little late in the game, there is nothing wrong with a little troubleshooting. I may never know if someone disrecommended me, but I can at least determine if there are problems with my personal statement. While this is not the final version, it has the basic contents and I think the differences are negligible. There may be something inherently cheesy about using a quote but I tried to keep it grounded. Your feedback is greatly appreciated and, please, be honest.

Personal Statement


I'm not sure if you were going for repetition but the last sentence of the first paragraph and the first sentence of the second was a bit awkward to read.

Also, most of the personal statement advice I've read/been given says that the adcomms do not want to read your resume again in PS form. They'd rather have you hone in on one or two of your many experiences to let them know who you are as an individual instead of a list of all the jobs you had and what you learned from them.

As you said, it's a bit late but I would edit the transition between the first and second paragraph or better yet, completely take out the paragraph about working at a fast food restaurant and instead use that new found space to give an example of why you found volunteering at the hospital to be so rewarding. Maybe talk about something specific you encountered during your work which cemented your decision to go into public service. Hope that helped! Good luck.

oliver_h
Posts: 14
Joined: Tue Jun 28, 2011 1:42 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby oliver_h » Tue Jun 28, 2011 9:44 am

I have a personal statement, a 250-word essay, and perhaps a diversity statement to swap. PM me and we can do an even exchange.

Thanks.

mbk
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Jul 06, 2011 12:15 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby mbk » Wed Jul 06, 2011 12:22 am

Can someone read this over and comment?

I just started it, and I'm not sure whether I'm going in the right direction (or any direction) that will lead me to a great personal statement.

I also have no idea what else to write about... so any help/suggestions/comments/ANYTHING would be appreciated.

Thanks!

My relationship with my father, tumultuous at times, dangerous at others, was especially chaotic through the lens of my mental disorder. The arguments, fights, police involvement, and eventual severance of ties and disownment tired me out by the time I reached college, and if not for friends, treatment, and my involvement in one non-profit, Detroit Urban Debate Education, I would not have discovered my passion for law and serving the community.
Facing an abusive, mercurial, and hyper-patriarchal Turkish father presented many problems while growing up. I hid the bruises in elementary school for fear of my father’s wrath if my friends told the school counselor. I feigned wellbeing in high school to mask the inner turmoil and daily depression I was facing. And I unknowingly lived with an undiagnosed and dormant mental illness, bipolar disorder, a disease that wouldn’t manifest itself until my freshman year of college. When my depression escalated to a first, and then a second suicide attempt, I told my fellow patients in the in-patient unit of the hospital that I had hit “rock bottom.” One patient, Steve, told me, “Even when you hit rock bottom, there’s always that trajectory – that bounce of opportunity that you can grapple onto.” My second chance was a non-profit called Detroit Urban Debate Education (DUDE).
For three to twelve hours a week, I would coach, judge, research, and strategize with policy debaters in Detroit high schools. I became assistant director of the non-profit organization my freshman year of college and continued serving on the board until I graduated from the university. Within that first year, I worked with other DUDE members to organize a debate camp, two charity events, and a conference. DUDE inspired my strong passion for serving the community and petitioning for social justice through high school debate programs. The non-profit also piqued my interest in public policy and large-scale problem solving.
My background in debate along with lessons I’ve learned from my father and mental illness have prepared me for the struggles ahead in a career in law. I possess the endurance, strength, independence, interest in education, and passion to serve my community that would mold me into a levelheaded lawyer.

bbalcrzy23
Posts: 142
Joined: Sun Jul 10, 2011 6:57 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby bbalcrzy23 » Thu Jul 14, 2011 9:56 pm

Anyone want to swap? PM me

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boalthopeful
Posts: 72
Joined: Wed Jun 08, 2011 2:38 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby boalthopeful » Thu Jul 21, 2011 1:44 pm

hi im down to swap!

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chem
Posts: 867
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Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby chem » Thu Jul 21, 2011 1:46 pm

Im up for swapping

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sach1282
Posts: 330
Joined: Sun Oct 18, 2009 1:50 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby sach1282 » Sat Jul 23, 2011 8:56 pm

Edit: Swapped already.
Last edited by sach1282 on Mon Jul 25, 2011 3:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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annyong
Posts: 317
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Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby annyong » Sat Jul 23, 2011 9:02 pm

.
Last edited by annyong on Mon Feb 20, 2012 10:20 am, edited 1 time in total.

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sach1282
Posts: 330
Joined: Sun Oct 18, 2009 1:50 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby sach1282 » Wed Aug 03, 2011 6:15 pm

Edit: swap done

anmar213
Posts: 16
Joined: Fri Aug 05, 2011 2:51 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby anmar213 » Fri Aug 05, 2011 2:54 pm

Hello,

Getting ready for September applications, would anyone be interested in swapping? PM me please

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billyez
Posts: 868
Joined: Sun Jun 14, 2009 6:19 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby billyez » Sat Aug 06, 2011 3:16 pm

Bored 2L. Likes reading PS's and critiquing them. Trying not to worry about OCI. Help me out with that by sending yours in and I'll see if I can't help you out.

I've only got one left to read and critique so I'm all ears.

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MiAiLi
Posts: 45
Joined: Thu Aug 04, 2011 7:39 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby MiAiLi » Mon Aug 08, 2011 12:40 pm

Would anyone like to exchange rough drafts? I am uncertain about my topic, and would be happy to swap with someone for some input. PM me! Thanks!

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matvei
Posts: 80
Joined: Sat Nov 20, 2010 8:25 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby matvei » Fri Aug 12, 2011 2:25 am

I am on my secondish draft and if anyone wants to read mine I'd greatly appreciate it and read yours in return :DDD

Just PM me!

mieri
Posts: 51
Joined: Wed Aug 17, 2011 8:14 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby mieri » Thu Aug 18, 2011 4:11 pm

I'm on my first draft! PM me for a swap!

ohyouknow
Posts: 39
Joined: Sat Oct 09, 2010 4:55 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby ohyouknow » Sat Aug 20, 2011 10:04 pm

Just finished my first draft. Anyone up for a trade? PM please.

gpnm
Posts: 34
Joined: Fri Mar 04, 2011 8:29 am

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby gpnm » Sun Aug 21, 2011 4:01 pm

Got a first draft ready...PM me if you want to swap!

llachans
Posts: 597
Joined: Wed Aug 24, 2011 12:54 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby llachans » Wed Aug 24, 2011 8:38 pm

I just finished my first draft of my PS. Anyone interested in swapping?

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sach1282
Posts: 330
Joined: Sun Oct 18, 2009 1:50 pm

Re: Swapping personal statements

Postby sach1282 » Wed Aug 24, 2011 9:01 pm

Looking to swap!




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