Swapping personal statements Forum

[theavrock]

Sent out some PM's. If anyone wants to swap PM me. Thanks!

[snapdragon]

please help. My personal statement bores ME to tears so far. Anyone willing to swap? PM me. I'll be harsh.

[xqhp82]

Hi, i'd be willing to swap - i've finished my PS draft and my DS is underway. would like to seek help from anyone who can give me honest comments and specifically grammar check because i'm an intl. applicant.

i'm aiming for T14 btw. shoot me a PM

[RedTop]

Looking to swap statements. Best to email me at red__top__@hotmail.com (two underscores in each place). Thanks.

[tipler4213]

a

[UCLAorbust]

Ok I made a new draft since the last one was quite elementary......I thought before that this subject might be to "personal", but I thought I'd see what y'all had to say. And I haven't finished the conclusion, I wanted some feedback on the topic first. If anyone wants to trade, email me at emilydodo@sbcglobal.net.

"Eyes on the chalkboard, Emily," commanded my 4th grade teacher Mrs. Hiuras, when she noticed I continuously kept my head down and turned away from the board. I never did find the courage to explain to her that rather than disinterest in the day's lesson, it was fear of revealing the yellowish bruise on my temple that was making me keep my head tilted at an angle in which my hair curtained the evidence. It was a game I played on not a few occasions, where a strategically placed pendant necklace or turtleneck sweater worn in the summertime could keep contained the things that I did not want my peers to know about my home life. It seemed only practical to keep up the charade, as I always knew I was not the only one with such habits. Later that year I saw my classmate Julia with a strange marking on her upper lip, eventually revealed to have been the indentation made by her braces from when her father punched her. I had heard rumors that another classmate received beatings with a wooden block whenever she came home with B's, which was confirmed months later while working on a group project at her house. Until I turned 13 and was legally able to live with my father, it never seemed unusual to me that youth such as myself were given such frequent physical incentives to stay in line. Later life experiences would show me that despite consistent efforts in the legal community to alleviate the problem, domestic violence is disturbingly prevalent.

Though the change in custody brought relief from physical abuse, my father soon became diagnosed with bladder cancer and had to take repeated medical leaves from his landscaping job. While my younger sister and I were able to temporarily make do off of the charity of a few local relatives, soon I had to start looking for work. I was able to finagle some odd jobs when I was too young to attain a worker's permit, and eventually got into the habit of working a few hours a day after school to make sure my sister and I never went hungry. My father's eventual marriage to an unemployed woman with four young kids added to the need to provide for my home. This added responsibility did not make me any less invested in my education; contrarily, school became an outlet for me to pursue the subjects that would shape me into a competent adult. Rather than plant in me a streak of self-pity, my struggles at home made clear to me the high correlation between hard work in school and improved personal conditions. Since the days when I would hide in my closet poring over East Asian short stories, academia was a means of keeping my eyes on the goal of future prosperity. As a student at a GATE school, my academic abilities had always been lauded and challenged in the classroom, with every day bringing new opportunities and subjects to explore. I became engrossed with Speech and Debate and Academic Decathlon in high school, eventually competing nationally in debate and becoming state champion in the Decathlon's speech category. These and other accomplishments paved the way for grants and merit scholarships that lessened the financial burdens felt by my family. When student loans became insufficient to support me past my freshman year at American University, I enrolled at the local community college and was later admitted to UC Berkeley. My persistent pursuit of financial aid and multiple side jobs made me able to attend Cal and even be accepted to the EAP Singapore fall semester program for a minimal expense.

While I have left my own unsatisfactory childhood behind, every day I am reminded of how prevalent such conditions are for the young. My youngest step-sibling had been pushed down the stairs by his father a year before moving in with us, and nearly every child I have volunteered with at local shelters in high school and college has a history of physical or emotional abuse.

[dadengcrew]

I've sent some of you guys messages, but I'm still interested in trading and reading other's p.s. Email is dengjonathan@gmail.com

[alphagamma]

I'm interested in trading personal statements, too. Shoot me a PM.

[crossingforHYS]

Hello Everyone! anyone willing to read a DS...down for swapping ofcourse!

[deathviaboredom]

A

[crossingforHYS]

edit

[ufo0001]

Hey anyone willing to trade personal statements. My email is finnunt101@yahoo.com

[sealoquesea]

Just finished my Personal Statement. Would love to trade with someone for feedback or send out for critique. GJK1987@YAHOO.COM.

[bk1]

Willing to swap with others. PM me if you feel up to it. Mine is at http://www.top-law-schools.com/forums/v ... 8&t=126988.

[bedefan]

...

[younkink]

I finally have a draft! yes! PM me if you'd like to swap, and I'll send out some PMs myself

[cinefile 17]

.

[firemed]

If anyone is up for a swap I am game. Only proviso is my PS is about 4 pages double spaced because of my primary school, to be edited down later as necessary for the other schools on my list.

[saito816]

I have a nearly final draft (I hope) if anyone wants to swap. It's around 500 words currently. Just PM me

[conroyc]

I too have reached a semi-final draft of my PS, and would love to swap for further critique

[abitaman6363]

If any T-14 applicants would like to swap, feel free to PM me for a swap. No first drafts please.

[Relientkate]

I'd like to swap personal statements... I am a very nit-picky editor, and your PS will get a very thorough review. PM if interested!

[Mike12188]

I have a semi-final PS I'm looking to swap with someone applying to T30 or higher.

[justadude55]

i just finished my PS, but want some editing and/or critiques where they're due. i'm applying all over the t-25, but don't care where you're applying to as long as yours are interesting. PM to swap.

[apaint]

PM me if you are still looking to swap personal statements! I have finished a semi-final draft but I am worried about clarity in a few areas so an outsider's view would be greatly appreciated.