Let's see who can tear my PS apart the most

(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
rsox5000

New
Posts: 23
Joined: Sun Apr 24, 2016 3:07 pm

Let's see who can tear my PS apart the most

Postby rsox5000 » Mon Oct 24, 2016 9:10 pm

I had always strived to become a physician. I took AP science classes in high school, fulfilled most of the pre-medical requirements in college, and was actively looking for a doctor to shadow when one of my professors informed the class of an internship available over the summer at the local pro bono office. I initially scoffed at the idea, as I wanted to be a doctor, not a lawyer. After a couple of sleepless and pensive nights, I decided to interview for the position. I never considered a career outside of medicine, and I believed that this internship would be a great way for me to expose myself to another profession. I accepted the offer and a few days later began the internship that would change my life.
My first week at Lackawanna Pro Bono played out nothing like I thought it would. I was neither bored nor regretful for accepting the internship. What I felt instead was a sense of fulfillment that had been foreign to me until this point. Examining legal documents, screening potential clients, and printing out dockets might not seem like interesting work, but I loved it. Part of this enjoyment came from helping people who are in need, but part of it also came from intellectual stimulation. A lawyer once told me that starting a case is akin to “going down the rabbit hole” and this concept succinctly sums up why I find the law so fascinating. Rather than following a prescribed path to meet the objective, a lawyer generally must carve out his own path. I may not have been working on cases during my time at the Pro Bono office, but my exposure to the law was adequate enough to assure me that I will be stimulated intellectually while I practice it. My subsequent internship with a local judge reaffirmed my passion for the law by providing me with the opportunity to observe trials and examine how the law is practiced. I am fully cognizant of the dismal state of the legal job market today, but my time spent interning in the legal field so far has assured me that this is what I want to do.
I do not regret spending my first three semesters on the pre med track. The hallmark of the Jesuit liberal arts education is the general education requirement that mandates taking courses in a variety of disciplines. This facet of my education forced me to think critically like a philosopher, reason like a mathematician, empathize like a theologian, and employ rhetoric like a politician. My natural science classes augmented this balanced skillset by providing me with a fluency in science that can prove invaluable in a legal world that encompasses many different disciplines. This balanced approach, while embodied in the courses I have taken, has been a guiding principle in my life since childhood. In an age where a growing number of people choose to focus on a small number of activities, I eschewed specialization in favor of generalization. I may not have excelled in one particular area, but what I lost in commendations I gained in experience and diversity. My time playing the piano and the violin, hitting a ball with a bat and a racquet, and working at a construction site and in an office all helped contribute to who I am as a person today. My comprehensive upbringing has engendered abilities to thrive in a variety of environments, think on my feet, and quickly adapt to change.

User avatar
sweets91

Silver
Posts: 763
Joined: Mon Sep 05, 2016 1:22 am

Re: Let's see who can tear my PS apart the most

Postby sweets91 » Mon Oct 24, 2016 9:13 pm

I feel like I skimmed this PS in a different thread. Is this the same poster?

Does everyone have to post with a title like "tear my PS apart!" "rip her to shreds!" when a simple request will do? :roll:

User avatar
Mr. Archer

Bronze
Posts: 270
Joined: Sat Nov 15, 2014 7:08 pm

Re: Let's see who can tear my PS apart the most

Postby Mr. Archer » Mon Oct 24, 2016 9:24 pm

It's jumbled, and it's hard to tell what you intended as the theme. It looks like you start out with a theme of "why law?" but then switch to resume' description/general college experience description once you talk about the judicial internship. There's also some description of your hobbies that are tossed in for good measure, but this doesn't do anything for you. The statement about the dismal state of the law does nothing for you and doesn't make any sense in a PS, unless you're just advertising that you don't expect a potential law school to be responsible for getting you a job?

User avatar
youknowsimone

New
Posts: 40
Joined: Mon Jan 04, 2016 9:52 pm

Re: Let's see who can tear my PS apart the most

Postby youknowsimone » Mon Oct 24, 2016 11:58 pm

You seem to make references to some things at the end that you didn't at the beginning. In my opinion, the PS should come full circle. Explain why law school is the best place for you to learn the things that you want to learn. It just seems like you're giving excuses for an unapparent problem at the end. (Eschewed specialization? Come on, we all have majors and minors.)

I'm willing to bet that the topic of pre-med to pre-law is more common than you may think. Maybe focus on one particular experience at your pro bono law clinic that stands out from the rest, the narrative of which is compelling for your admission into law school. Was there a moment while you were working that you realized you wanted to be a lawyer? If so, explain it in detail, and focus on how that aligns with your passions.



Return to “Law School Personal Statements?

Who is online

The online users are hidden on this forum.