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(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
Anonymous User
Posts: 273234
Joined: Tue Aug 11, 2009 9:32 am

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Postby Anonymous User » Wed Dec 31, 2014 12:13 pm

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Last edited by Anonymous User on Sun Jan 04, 2015 10:18 am, edited 1 time in total.

mka5000066
Posts: 15
Joined: Wed Dec 10, 2014 12:52 pm

Re: PS feedback, please

Postby mka5000066 » Thu Jan 01, 2015 7:14 pm

So i'm relatively new to this forum, and am going through the struggle of writing a personal statement myself, so take whatever I say with a grain of salt.

I think your ability to story tell and the narrative is extremely intriguing, however there is one main thing that I was looking for an answer to that I never really found, why do you want to be a lawyer?

I would maybe reduce the amount of space you spend writing on your family, although they are obviously important in order to describe how your mindset developed, and spend more time exploring why you want to become a lawyer, and what makes you capable of achieving your dreams.

Also, I would go through and make sure the grammar is correct, for instance, " my teenage years vs my teenager years".

Again, I am not an expert, just someone in a similar position so feel free to trust your gut instinct over whatever I suggest.

Goodluck! I hope you achieve whatever you strive for.

Anonymous User
Posts: 273234
Joined: Tue Aug 11, 2009 9:32 am

Re: PS feedback, please

Postby Anonymous User » Sun Jan 04, 2015 10:20 am

mka5000066 wrote:So i'm relatively new to this forum, and am going through the struggle of writing a personal statement myself, so take whatever I say with a grain of salt.

I think your ability to story tell and the narrative is extremely intriguing, however there is one main thing that I was looking for an answer to that I never really found, why do you want to be a lawyer?

I would maybe reduce the amount of space you spend writing on your family, although they are obviously important in order to describe how your mindset developed, and spend more time exploring why you want to become a lawyer, and what makes you capable of achieving your dreams.

Also, I would go through and make sure the grammar is correct, for instance, " my teenage years vs my teenager years".

Again, I am not an expert, just someone in a similar position so feel free to trust your gut instinct over whatever I suggest.

Goodluck! I hope you achieve whatever you strive for.


Thanks!




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