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(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
act
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Jan 25, 2014 6:41 pm

deleted

Postby act » Sat Jan 25, 2014 7:28 pm

...
Last edited by act on Tue Jan 28, 2014 3:33 pm, edited 2 times in total.

lawschool2014hopeful
Posts: 554
Joined: Mon Oct 25, 2010 8:48 pm

Re: Really Rough First Draft - Please help

Postby lawschool2014hopeful » Sat Jan 25, 2014 9:25 pm

Your first paragraph had potential to turn into something really personal, something unique

then you went into talking about the generic TFA story

Id much rather hear your story camping, literally or metaphorically.

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yomisterd
Posts: 1556
Joined: Wed Oct 09, 2013 12:52 pm

Re: Really Rough First Draft - Please help

Postby yomisterd » Sat Jan 25, 2014 9:27 pm

jimmierock wrote:Your first paragraph had potential to turn into something really personal, something unique

then you went into talking about the generic TFA story

Id much rather hear your story camping, literally or metaphorically.


This.

act
Posts: 13
Joined: Sat Jan 25, 2014 6:41 pm

Re: Really Rough First Draft - Please help

Postby act » Sat Jan 25, 2014 10:12 pm

Fair enough. The first paragraph originally went with a different concept that I then abandoned to go with this because I was told that I should try to sell the AmeriCorps thing. I will go back to the drawing board then, thank you.




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