DS (Mixed URM) - Willing to RETURN the favor for comments

(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
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odela
Posts: 53
Joined: Mon Dec 24, 2012 4:48 pm

DS (Mixed URM) - Willing to RETURN the favor for comments

Postby odela » Thu Jan 02, 2014 2:35 am

If you comment, PM me your PS or DS if you want feedback. :D

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“What is your race?” is a question that is commonly asked of me when I meet someone. This curiosity is shared with those who know me and some are surprised to discover that I am of mixed race and ethnicity. Some of my family and friends overlook my Asian side because I am a quarter Korean in comparison to my three quarters Mexican. Questions by friends and family to prove my knowledge and linguistic skills serve as a barrier to ethnic acceptance. For some, I am not Mexican or Asian enough to be accepted by either race but for others I am. Furthermore, as a single teenage mom, my mother prioritized my well-being before focusing on cultural experiences at home.

These challenges may have presented a hindrance towards understanding my identity, but I react to them as a form of motivation in taking up opportunities to learn more about both sides of my heritage such as through time with family in the US and in Jalisco, Mexico. Many traits I value from my Mexican heritage, like community serve as advantages that may not have been present in me otherwise and the more I learn about my Korean heritage through interactions with other Koreans the more I discover just how similar these two cultures are.

Penn Law offers opportunities to further challenge me and meet my goals. Its ties and proximity to Philadelphia and the Mid-Atlantic region provides access to a large legal market that needs to properly accommodate and represent a growing Latino population. My desire to work with this demographic has been augmented by my impression of the school’s Latino Law Students Association, which allows a Penn Law student to be active in creating a greater presence for the school in the local community but also focusing on increasing its members’ knowledge of issues through conferences with prominent Latino leaders in law and education, and collaborations with local organizations.

Given my background, I can represent Mexicans and Latinos in a legal field in which they are underrepresented while offering an ethnic dynamic that helps me understand and argue multiple viewpoints of two minority groups as well as mixed race individuals. My participation in legal discourse in law school, especially concerning race and ethnicity, will supplement the cultural and intellectual diversity of my university colleagues by questioning our assumptions, offering values and ideas from a unique perspective even within a diverse body of students.

xmbeckham
Posts: 61
Joined: Sun Oct 13, 2013 10:36 pm

Re: DS (Mixed URM) - Willing to RETURN the favor for comments

Postby xmbeckham » Thu Jan 02, 2014 6:22 am

You seem to have an interesting background. But may I ask why you combine a DS with a “why Penn” essay? Are you not going to send DS to other schools?

I'd suggest you to write a separate statement for why X schools, and make your DS more substantive. Besides just telling people that you are both Mexican and Korean, what else can you say about your identity? What have you done in the past and how does your mixed identity shape your personality and ambitions? What's in your race that differentiates you from other applicants? Think about it.

PS: I may PM you my DS. Thanks in advance.

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scoobysnax
Posts: 208
Joined: Fri Nov 15, 2013 3:51 pm

Re: DS (Mixed URM) - Willing to RETURN the favor for comments

Postby scoobysnax » Fri Jan 03, 2014 1:04 am

Your first paragraph seems to imply that you're not that in tune with your two cultures, and you attribute that to your mother (btw I'm not really a fan of "as a single teenage mom, my mother prioritized my well-being before focusing on cultural experiences at home." It sounds like you're complaining that she didn't focus on your cultural education because she cared more about making sure you were cared for in general. Sounds like she did the best she could but you're whining.)

Then you go on to discuss the values you learned from your both your Latino side and Korean side, which is confusing because I'm still under the impression that you didn't really have a cultural education growing up. Furthermore, you continue on by saying you can bring this perspective (again, I'm still wondering- what perspective? Your examples are very vague.) will allow you to actively contribute to the Latino community. While this is great, I'm left asking, what about his Korean side?




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