DUI Addendum Critique

(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )

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Total votes: 5

Anonymous User
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Joined: Tue Aug 11, 2009 9:32 am

DUI Addendum Critique

Postby Anonymous User » Sat Jan 19, 2013 5:24 am

Don't know if I elaborate too much, don't give enough detail on the final exposition, or what. Honestly it was 7 years ago so the details are a bit hazy at this point. But anyway, here it is.

"I am writing this addendum in regards to question X on the character and fitness portion of the application. In the early morning hours of my 20th birthday, February 19th, 2006, I was pulled over and arrested for driving under the influence of alcohol. It was a tremendous error in judgment, and a mistake that still costs me to this day, financially (via car insurance) and otherwise.
I made the decision to leave a party at one location in order to attend a party at a different location, under the presumption that the amount of alcohol I had already consumed was not enough to render me over the legal limit. Clearly, I was mistaken, as I registered a .14% blood alcohol content. I spent roughly 10 hours of my birthday in jail, a “present” I’ve certainly never forgotten.

In late May of 2006 I pled guilty to the charges against me. I was sentenced to 90 days probation, ordered to pay $750 in court costs, had my driver’s license suspended for 30 days and restricted for an additional 60 days, attended a mandatory first-time offenders group counseling session, and was ordered to pay an additional $500 to have my license reinstated, along with another $500 the next year as part of Michigan’s Driver Responsibility Fee program.

While my mistake was obviously costly, I do think there was much good that came out of the situation in the long run. The incident helped to divorce me from the “typical college student” lifestyle of excessive alcohol consumption that I had probably been too keen to partake in. I realized that I was rather lucky to simply have been pulled over, instead of suffering a worse fate, as many who drink and drive often do. Ultimately, though I can’t say I am glad that it happened, I can say that I haven’t been behind the wheel after drinking since, and I know I won’t be again for the foreseeable future."

RodneyRuxin
Posts: 455
Joined: Mon Sep 17, 2012 11:08 pm

Re: DUI Addendum Critique

Postby RodneyRuxin » Sat Jan 19, 2013 5:38 am

I'm not in admissions; but the specifics of your DUI (especially the .14--as .08 is the legal limit and there are worse penalties for anything over .10---also .14 doesn't sound like "i had a beer and thought i could drive" to me...) and details about your punishment (it was a lot, and was really long) turned me off.

I also don't think you talk about how you've learned from it. Yeah, you SAY you have changed--but have you? I sure don't know from reading this. You stopped drinking and driving. Great. Show them. Talk less about the specifics and more about what makes you unique--what exactly have you learned? What did this make you learn about yourself? What community service did you do? Did any of the punishments make you see the error of your ways?

I like the part about luckily i just got pulled over, but it seems you're only caring about yourself there--the law doesn't restrict drunk driving bc you can hurt yourself--it does it so you don't hurt others.

Good luck!

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ChikaBoom
Posts: 6492
Joined: Fri Jun 08, 2012 9:16 am

Re: DUI Addendum Critique

Postby ChikaBoom » Sat Jan 19, 2013 9:32 am

I don't think you need to add all the extra details and cute things to this. Just state the facts and move on. I think a small demonstration of what you learned (not to do it again) is fine and I didn't actually fix that part. You will want to go back through that part and work on that. Don't say 'foreseeable future' as that's something people say when they aren't completely sure that something will happen. Given that this is 100 percent in your control, alluding to doubt like that definitely made me wonder.

Anonymous User wrote:Don't know if I elaborate too much, don't give enough detail on the final exposition, or what. Honestly it was 7 years ago so the details are a bit hazy at this point. But anyway, here it is.

"I am writing this addendum in regards to question X on the character and fitness portion of the application. In the early morning hours of my 20th birthday, On February 19th, 2006, I was pulled over and arrested for driving under the influence of alcohol. It was a tremendous error in judgment,and a mistake that still costs me to this day, financially (via car insurance) and otherwise.
I made the decision to leave a party at one location in order to attend a party at a different location, under the presumption that the amount of alcohol I had already consumed was not enough to render me over the legal limit. Clearly, I was mistaken, as I registered a .14% blood alcohol content. I spent roughly 10 hours of my birthday in jail, a “present” I’ve certainly never forgotten.
In late May of 2006 I pled guilty to the charges against me. I was sentenced to 90 days probation, ordered to pay $750 in court costs, had my driver’s license suspended for 30 days and restricted for an additional 60 days, attended a mandatory first-time offenders group counseling session, and was ordered to pay an additional $500 to have my license reinstated, along with another $500 the next year as part of Michigan’s Driver Responsibility Fee program.

While my mistake was obviously costly both personally and financially, I do think there was much good that came out of the situation in the long run.The incident helped to divorce me from the “typical college student” lifestyle of excessive alcohol consumption that I had probably been too keen to partake in. I realized that I was rather lucky to simply have been pulled over, instead of suffering a worse fate, as many who drink and drive often do.Ultimately, though I can’t say I am glad that it happened, I can say that I haven’t been behind the wheel after drinking since, and I know I won’t be againfor the foreseeable future."




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