Personal Statement idea.Thoughts/Advice/Edit/Critique Please

(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )

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Joined: Mon Jan 14, 2013 12:59 pm

Personal Statement idea.Thoughts/Advice/Edit/Critique Please

Postby mkash1 » Mon Jan 14, 2013 1:12 pm

On June 16, 1970, my father S k left for the first time his small village of xxx, yyy, embarking for him a journey that would make him the first member of his family to emigrate from yyy to the United States. Coming from a destitute up-bringing, S carried in his possession only one handbag, which contained $100 US Dollars, a toothbrush, one change of clothes and a letter of acceptance to University Of Illinois at Chicago. Despite the trials and tribulations that S faced, he focused on a vision for himself - to obtain a college degree in Business and live “The American Dream”. Throughout his academic career, S strong work ethic, discipline, and determination allowed him to obtain not only a college degree but also graduate at the top of his class.
On February 19,1997, just weeks after my seventh birthday, my father would leave his last imprint for his family, as he passed away. Marking the most significant day of my life, my hero, role model, provider, and father – could not battle his way through kidney failure. Leaving behind five children, a stay at home wife, and a convenience store, all normalcy was suddenly altered. My two eldest brothers at the time were still in High School – forgoing their dreams and opportunities and took the initiative to provide for the family by managing my father’s small convenience store.
Due to the unforeseen and tragic events of my life I needed to sacrifice my childhood and take responsibility to assist my brothers by working at my fathers convenience store as much as I could. At a young age I learned not only the importance of working hard but also experienced first hand the value of being independent academically, which has paved the path for my intuition to enter in a career of law.
Although my mother has never received an education she would consistently emphasize the importance of education in a changing world. This consistent emphasis my mother instilled in her children created a family of hardworking and motivated individuals all with a college degree today. Furthermore, my mother did not speak English at the time creating difficulty for me to gain the assistance necessary in my pursuit for academic enhancement, however, with my hard work and determination I was able to overcome these challenges and battle new obstacles.
Today my family owns multiple successful businesses including restaurants, several franchises, and an investment firm throughout ppp. While attending X University I spent much of my time working at the investment firm, specifically, negotiating leases, creating letters of intent, and crafting new ideas for prospective businesses. I was also able to apply the knowledge I obtained to the firm by (how). I have always had a passion for a Law degree; however, my true desire to pursue a degree in law came from working closely with attorneys at my family’s investment firm. In particular, a legal issue against a general contractor we hired. This contractor won the bid to work on two new restaurant projects we spent months in advance planning for, the completion of the contract was said to be complete at the end of July 2009, however, doors to open these two projects were delayed nearly eight months; causing rent and miscellaneous expenses to rise much higher than budgeted for. We were in the process of pursuing legal action for work that was incomplete as well as compensation for work that went months overdue. The contractor failed to abide by the terms resulting in a breach of contract. Through this incident I had the opportunity to work closely with a team of attorneys and experienced first hand the process involved in solving corporate conflicts through a legal approach. It was at that time where my passion to pursue a law degree was ignited and solidified.
Although I enjoyed my work at the firm and it is expected that I take over the company it is not my passion, and if there is a lesson learned from my father and his vision, it is to embark on a journey that you are passionate about. While taking over the firm is an honor it is also the easy way out. I know my father would be proud of me for going against the norm and following my dream of becoming an attorney, just as he followed his dream of coming to America 43 years ago. I am prepared for the challenges ahead and will apply my knowledge, experience, and unstoppable dedication to your law school. J law strives to ensure that their student base is diverse and is intellectually open, and I believe I will be a consistent contributing factor that will assist J in reaching their goals. I hope that I have the opportunity and honor to successfully complete and become a lawyer at J law school.

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