First draft of PS, please help!
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lawschool4
- Posts: 33
- Joined: Thu Aug 11, 2011 3:18 pm
First draft of PS, please help!
Please feel free to critique the shit out of my PS
Last edited by lawschool4 on Mon Feb 04, 2013 7:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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eleemosynary2
- Posts: 44
- Joined: Fri Jul 20, 2012 9:24 pm
Re: First draft of PS, please help!
Wow. First of all, I am sorry for your loss.
A minor point for now - don't use that quote. It makes it sound like your vision of lawyering is about lying, which I doubt is true. Also, don't use any quote at all for this essay - best to end with your own reflection or determined statement.
A minor point for now - don't use that quote. It makes it sound like your vision of lawyering is about lying, which I doubt is true. Also, don't use any quote at all for this essay - best to end with your own reflection or determined statement.
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lawschool4
- Posts: 33
- Joined: Thu Aug 11, 2011 3:18 pm
Re: First draft of PS, please help!
Thank you for your help!
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basketball law guy
- Posts: 84
- Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 12:13 pm
Re: First draft of PS, please help!
First of all- really sorry for your loss.
Second of all- I love the story and I think it has the potential to be a very good PS> I don't have time to elaborate but proofread and shorten some of your sentences. Some of them are too long and cumbersome. Good luck- wish I had time to elaborate.
Second of all- I love the story and I think it has the potential to be a very good PS> I don't have time to elaborate but proofread and shorten some of your sentences. Some of them are too long and cumbersome. Good luck- wish I had time to elaborate.
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