Final Draft, I hope - any input please

(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
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Joined: Fri Dec 30, 2011 3:13 pm

Final Draft, I hope - any input please

Postby tilly66 » Tue Jan 10, 2012 3:37 pm

Last edited by tilly66 on Wed Jan 11, 2012 1:56 am, edited 4 times in total.

Posts: 160
Joined: Wed Oct 13, 2010 4:09 pm

Re: personal statement draft - please critique

Postby postn0bills » Tue Jan 10, 2012 9:16 pm

I like this topic, but I feel like it needs to get more personal. What's the name of your business, what does it mean to you, what were some personal triumphs and struggles in establishing your business? Why do you want to go to law school if you have your own successful business? It leaves a lot to be desired, I want to know more about you as a person, not just surface details about your business.

Posts: 4
Joined: Fri Dec 30, 2011 3:13 pm

Re: final draft - I hope

Postby tilly66 » Wed Jan 11, 2012 1:49 am

Here is what I hope is my final draft. Any input is appreciated.

December of 2005 I graduated from college and started my own business. My husband had been working sales as an independent contractor for a payment processor. While completing college and raising our small children, I would assist and support my husband with anything needed such as paperwork or driving as he canvassed for new customers. During this time is when we really started to learn about the payment card industry. We also learned that the best way to make money and succeed was to open our own office. My business provides payment services for small to medium size merchants. We setup clients to accept payments for their goods or services using credit cards, checks, and gift or loyalty cards. It was seemingly easy to open my own independent office; $10,000.00 and the willingness to work. My husband was responsible for sales and I was responsible for managing and development of the office. Commitment, accountability, and organization were the skills I would need to be successful.

The managing of my own office required a form of perseverance not necessarily needed when I worked for another persons company. I am carrying all the risk if this does not work out. There are no weekends, sick days, vacation days, or holidays. Every day is a work day. My customers are counting on me to provide a quality of service that meets their expectations, and sometimes their expectations can be quite high. I have made a commitment to provide a service that exceeds their expectations. To do this I must have personal responsibility and be accountable to my clients.

Every customer counts, no matter how large or small. When a merchants credit card machine is not working or when they are not getting their deposits for their sales then that affects their ability to be successful. When it happens to be a holiday like Thanksgiving or New Years Eve, there is no asking them to call back after the holidays. I must have the patience and compassion to solve their problem and get them processing again. I have to be accountable to them. I owe my customers the assurance that I accept responsibility for any problems that may occur and I will do all I can to fix it. For the benefit of my customers I must be organized and pay attention to detail to make as few mistakes as possible.

Organizational skills are vital for the owner who is handling all their own office work. The process to incorporate the business, lease an office space, and register to become an Independent Sales Office with a processor was daunting. Every step had contracts and agreements. I had to read for detail and look for understanding in the words and structure, because if it is not in writing, it is not part of the contract. I used this as my foundation. I learned to negotiate contracts to the benefit of my company and to level the playing field. I learned that if you do not ask, you cannot be told yes. I also learned if the answer is no then maybe I just haven't asked the question right. Once the office opened, there were the bank records to process, quarterly reports, tax payments, vendor payments, and accounting records. There also were all the files and reports associated with the customer portfolio. My most rewarding accomplishment has been the creation of the Standard Operating Procedures. I have assembled and put into writing the process or procedure of every task, no matter how mundane, organized and with attention to detail. This has allowed me the opportunity to hire employees and step away from my part of the business.

A significant lesson I learned while developing my business is that my customers success is paramount to my own. What I do is simple but it is not easy. The process of building my own business, and structuring it to work without me afforded me the opportunity to practice commitment, organization, and accountability. These characteristics and skills will be fundamental to my study and career in law.

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