education gap addendum help

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houng89
Posts: 81
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2010 3:06 am

education gap addendum help

Postby houng89 » Thu Oct 20, 2011 11:37 pm

wondering if anyone could read this and critique this pls!

here is a revised ed

Education Gap Addendum

Shortly before my junior year began, three finger tendons in my right hand ruptured. My right wrist required extensive surgery and I was not able to attend the first month of fall classes. Consequently, USC granted me a medical leave of absence for the semester. I then chose to enroll as a full time student at Irvine Valley College to continue my education in the timeliest fashion possible. I took this opportunity to take a variety of courses in psychology, criminal law, and real estate. Unexpectedly, this unconventional semester became the catalyst for my exploration into the field of law. My leave of absence also allowed me to refocus academically. Not only did I graduate a semester early despite my leave of absence, but I also earned straight A’s following my return to USC.
Last edited by houng89 on Wed Oct 26, 2011 3:07 am, edited 2 times in total.

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theadvancededit
Posts: 315
Joined: Sun Aug 28, 2011 1:31 pm

Re: education gap addendum help

Postby theadvancededit » Fri Oct 21, 2011 12:39 pm

houng89 wrote:wondering if anyone could read this and critique this pls!

Education Gap Addendum
Shortly before my junior year began, three finger tendons in my right hand ruptured. My right wrist required extensive surgery and I was not able to attend the first month of fall classes. Consequently, USC granted me a medical leave of absence for the semester. I then chose to enroll as a full time student at Irvine Valley College as their academic year started much later and I would be able to continue my studies in the most timely way possible. I enrolled in a variety of psychology, criminal law, and real estate courses. Unexpectedly, this unconventional semester became the catalyst for my exploration into the field of law. My leave of absence also allowed me to refocus academically. Not only did I graduate a semester early despite my leave of absence, but I also earned straight A’s following my return to USC.

houng89
Posts: 81
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2010 3:06 am

Re: education gap addendum help

Postby houng89 » Sun Oct 23, 2011 11:30 pm

theadvancededit wrote:
houng89 wrote:wondering if anyone could read this and critique this pls!

Education Gap Addendum
Shortly before my junior year began, three finger tendons in my right hand ruptured. My right wrist required extensive surgery and I was not able to attend the first month of fall classes. Consequently, USC granted me a medical leave of absence for the semester. I then chose to enroll as a full time student at Irvine Valley College as their academic year started much later and I would be able to continue my studies in the most timely way possible. I enrolled in a variety of psychology, criminal law, and real estate courses. Unexpectedly, this unconventional semester became the catalyst for my exploration into the field of law. My leave of absence also allowed me to refocus academically. Not only did I graduate a semester early despite my leave of absence, but I also earned straight A’s following my return to USC.


thank you for the help! i was wondering if you could elaborate on what you mean by this specific revision "and I would be able to continue my studies in the most timely way possible"?

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theadvancededit
Posts: 315
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Re: education gap addendum help

Postby theadvancededit » Mon Oct 24, 2011 11:31 pm

It means so that, by studying at Irvine, you would not lose time and be able to graduate when were supposed to. So, you'd be studying in a timely fashion.

houng89
Posts: 81
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2010 3:06 am

Re: education gap addendum help

Postby houng89 » Wed Oct 26, 2011 2:27 am

o ok thank you, i actually left that out bc none of the credits actually applied, i just took courses cause honestly i didn't just want to stay at home doing nothing while i did PT recovering




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