PS - Catchy? Do you get the point?

(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
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coobs
Posts: 46
Joined: Mon Feb 01, 2010 6:05 am

PS - Catchy? Do you get the point?

Postby coobs » Thu Oct 20, 2011 11:00 pm

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Last edited by coobs on Sun Dec 04, 2011 1:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

kaiser
Posts: 2940
Joined: Mon May 09, 2011 11:34 pm

Re: PS - Catchy? Do you get the point?

Postby kaiser » Thu Oct 20, 2011 11:08 pm

I think you have the template for what will be a very good PS. Not going to go into details, but take out the thing at the end about kids fresh out of school. Its unnecessary since you already spoke to your years of life experience. The reader can make the obvious inference about the point you are trying to make without you forcing it at the end. But certainly an interesting and rather dramatic statement. I'd definitely go with this as a template as you continue to refine and edit.




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