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(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
Its the gel man
Posts: 28
Joined: Sat Jan 08, 2011 5:03 pm

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Postby Its the gel man » Sun Jan 16, 2011 9:08 am

Thanks again.
Last edited by Its the gel man on Sun Jan 16, 2011 5:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Its the gel man
Posts: 28
Joined: Sat Jan 08, 2011 5:03 pm

Re: PS overhaul --From fourth draft to first (i.e I need help)

Postby Its the gel man » Sun Jan 16, 2011 1:03 pm

bump

CanadianWolf
Posts: 10439
Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2010 4:54 pm

Re: PS overhaul --From fourth draft to first (i.e I need help)

Postby CanadianWolf » Sun Jan 16, 2011 1:09 pm

Your eight paragraph essay contains two paragraphs of material that have very little relevance to your quest for admission to law school. Bluntly speaking, this is more of a high school "what I did over the summer" essay than it is a personal statement for an intellectually demanding graduate school.

User avatar
verklempt
Posts: 115
Joined: Sat Dec 11, 2010 6:59 pm

Re: PS overhaul --From fourth draft to first (i.e I need help)

Postby verklempt » Sun Jan 16, 2011 1:33 pm

Seems as though you could turn the internship experience into a PS that demonstrated your skills and interpersonal abilities. I agree with CW that most of the PS here is irrelevant, hard to follow, and not material to the core of the PS. That's your back story -- don't need to include it, and if the only reason you volunteered is that you felt guilty about an offhand question posed a year earlier -- probably best not to mention it.

LSATclincher
Posts: 476
Joined: Mon Nov 30, 2009 12:09 pm

Re: PS overhaul --From fourth draft to first (i.e I need help)

Postby LSATclincher » Sun Jan 16, 2011 1:36 pm

The beginning anecdote is too long. I'd delete it. I agree w/ Canadianwolf in that the PS did not have a professional feel. I think it's ok to stick w/ an international law topic, though. I'm against a PS appeasing the law school masses except when discussing a few "trendy" topics: international law (namely spanish), an African American breaking from tradition, and a LGBT story.

But if this is going to be your PS, make sure you don't send it to conservative schools. It's too risky.

Its the gel man
Posts: 28
Joined: Sat Jan 08, 2011 5:03 pm

Re: PS overhaul --From fourth draft to first (i.e I need help)

Postby Its the gel man » Sun Jan 16, 2011 1:49 pm

Thanks for the great comments. And now, back to work.




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