Help with one sentence in Why Michigan?

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djeter2
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Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 2:41 pm

Help with one sentence in Why Michigan?

Postby djeter2 » Fri Dec 24, 2010 6:29 pm

I am pretty sure I need to have a colon at the end of the below sentence, but I would like some confirmation. Thanks for your help!

I am particularly interested in participating in Michigan’s General Practice Clinic, which would allow me to work on a variety of legal cases, including those related to my special interest: landlord-tenant law.

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Tanicius
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Re: Help with one sentence in Why Michigan?

Postby Tanicius » Fri Dec 24, 2010 7:13 pm

A comma seems better.

LSATclincher
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Re: Help with one sentence in Why Michigan?

Postby LSATclincher » Sun Dec 26, 2010 10:25 am

I would drop particularly because the position of that word and interested should be swapped. But then it would kinda conflict with the "in participating." As for the sentence. I'd break it up.

I am interested in participating in Michigan’s General Practice Clinic. The Clinic would provide an opportunity to work on a variety of legal cases, including those related to my special interest--landlord-tenant law.

The dash after "interest" is the preferred method here. Word will edit the dash once you type it in. It gives a streamlined look.

RockinJosh
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Re: Help with one sentence in Why Michigan?

Postby RockinJosh » Tue Dec 28, 2010 7:45 pm

LSATclincher wrote:I would drop particularly because the position of that word and interested should be swapped. But then it would kinda conflict with the "in participating." As for the sentence. I'd break it up.

I am interested in participating in Michigan’s General Practice Clinic. The Clinic would provide an opportunity to work on a variety of legal cases, including those related to my special interest--landlord-tenant law.

The dash after "interest" is the preferred method here. Word will edit the dash once you type it in. It gives a streamlined look.


I actually like the colon. The long dash, or "em dash" usually is used (imho) to show a break in thought... something like "I never thought I'd do it--until I did"

In this case, you seem less like you are breaking the thought and more like you are adding some description, and so I think the colon is fine, in my opinion. Though I don't think either is seriously wrong or would raise any eyebrows.

09042014
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Re: Help with one sentence in Why Michigan?

Postby 09042014 » Tue Dec 28, 2010 7:52 pm

"I couldn't get into Penn, and I don't own any pink shirts."

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arism87
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Re: Help with one sentence in Why Michigan?

Postby arism87 » Tue Dec 28, 2010 7:55 pm

LSATclincher wrote:I would drop particularly because the position of that word and interested should be swapped. But then it would kinda conflict with the "in participating." As for the sentence. I'd break it up.

I am interested in participating in Michigan’s General Practice Clinic. The Clinic would provide an opportunity to work on a variety of legal cases, including those related to my special interest--landlord-tenant law.

The dash after "interest" is the preferred method here. Word will edit the dash once you type it in. It gives a streamlined look.


I like this rewrite, but prefer it with the colon.

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AreJay711
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Re: Help with one sentence in Why Michigan?

Postby AreJay711 » Tue Dec 28, 2010 7:56 pm

RockinJosh wrote:
LSATclincher wrote:I would drop particularly because the position of that word and interested should be swapped. But then it would kinda conflict with the "in participating." As for the sentence. I'd break it up.

I am interested in participating in Michigan’s General Practice Clinic. The Clinic would provide an opportunity to work on a variety of legal cases, including those related to my special interest--landlord-tenant law.

The dash after "interest" is the preferred method here. Word will edit the dash once you type it in. It gives a streamlined look.


I actually like the colon. The long dash, or "em dash" usually is used (imho) to show a break in thought... something like "I never thought I'd do it--until I did"

In this case, you seem less like you are breaking the thought and more like you are adding some description, and so I think the colon is fine, in my opinion. Though I don't think either is seriously wrong or would raise any eyebrows.


A dash would work grammatically but go ahead and put the colon because it is considered more formal.




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