Quick Comma Question

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amissionsix
Posts: 48
Joined: Tue Jul 13, 2010 1:37 am

Quick Comma Question

Postby amissionsix » Wed Nov 03, 2010 10:26 pm

I'm having trouble deciding if a comma should be in these sentences. Sometimes I read them and think that a comma belongs and other times I don't. Your thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

First Sentence

Without Comma - As the two of us began talking we discussed the possibility of growing the group.

With Comma - As the two of us began talking, we discussed the possibility of growing the group.


Second Sentence

Without Comma - And as that summer progressed we formulated a business plan and mission statement to become the premier student organization on campus.

With Comma - And as that summer progressed, we formulated a business plan and mission statement to become the premier student organization on campus.

Thanks!

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gin
Posts: 389
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 3:35 pm

Re: Quick Comma Question

Postby gin » Wed Nov 03, 2010 10:44 pm

commas on both

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gin
Posts: 389
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 3:35 pm

Re: Quick Comma Question

Postby gin » Wed Nov 03, 2010 10:47 pm

also, (notice how i used a coma after "also") "began talking" sounds kind of funny. Try "began to talk"

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s0ph1e2007
Posts: 1054
Joined: Sat Oct 10, 2009 10:37 pm

Re: Quick Comma Question

Postby s0ph1e2007 » Wed Nov 03, 2010 10:48 pm

amissionsix wrote:I'm having trouble deciding if a comma should be in these sentences. Sometimes I read them and think that a comma belongs and other times I don't. Your thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

First Sentence

Without Comma - As the two of us began talking we discussed the possibility of growing the group.

With Comma - As the two of us began talking, we discussed the possibility of growing the group.


Second Sentence

Without Comma - And as that summer progressed we formulated a business plan and mission statement to become the premier student organization on campus.

With Comma - And as that summer progressed, we formulated a business plan and mission statement to become the premier student organization on campus.

Thanks!

NO AND

try additionally, then, anything else that works.
And is okay when you're doing creative writing, not for an admissions essay.

Renzo
Posts: 4265
Joined: Tue Dec 02, 2008 3:23 am

Re: Quick Comma Question

Postby Renzo » Wed Nov 03, 2010 10:52 pm

s0ph1e2007 wrote:
amissionsix wrote:I'm having trouble deciding if a comma should be in these sentences. Sometimes I read them and think that a comma belongs and other times I don't. Your thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

First Sentence

Without Comma - As the two of us began talking we discussed the possibility of growing the group.

With Comma - As the two of us began talking, we discussed the possibility of growing the group.


Second Sentence

Without Comma - And as that summer progressed we formulated a business plan and mission statement to become the premier student organization on campus.

With Comma - And as that summer progressed, we formulated a business plan and mission statement to become the premier student organization on campus.

Thanks!

NO AND

try additionally, then, anything else that works.
And is okay when you're doing creative writing, not for an admissions essay.

There's nothing wrong with the "and," as long as it contributes to the sentence. Next you'll be saying you can't split infinitives, and propagating other lies about the English language.

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gin
Posts: 389
Joined: Sat Oct 16, 2010 3:35 pm

Re: Quick Comma Question

Postby gin » Wed Nov 03, 2010 10:58 pm

Renzo wrote:
s0ph1e2007 wrote:
amissionsix wrote:I'm having trouble deciding if a comma should be in these sentences. Sometimes I read them and think that a comma belongs and other times I don't. Your thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

First Sentence

Without Comma - As the two of us began talking we discussed the possibility of growing the group.

With Comma - As the two of us began talking, we discussed the possibility of growing the group.


Second Sentence

Without Comma - And as that summer progressed we formulated a business plan and mission statement to become the premier student organization on campus.

With Comma - And as that summer progressed, we formulated a business plan and mission statement to become the premier student organization on campus.

Thanks!

NO AND

try additionally, then, anything else that works.
And is okay when you're doing creative writing, not for an admissions essay.

There's nothing wrong with the "and," as long as it contributes to the sentence. Next you'll be saying you can't split infinitives, and propagating other lies about the English language.


I'm with 13 on this one. There might not be anything wrong with the "and" grammatically but it is not needed and is taking space, so unless it's is a compound sentence, I would get rid of it.

amissionsix
Posts: 48
Joined: Tue Jul 13, 2010 1:37 am

Re: Quick Comma Question

Postby amissionsix » Wed Nov 03, 2010 11:03 pm

My reason for the "And" at the beginning of that sentence was because I wanted lead off with "As", but the previous sentence already did so. I tried a bunch of different words that achieved the same effect, but I felt they didn't flow as well. I appreciate the input guys.

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mjd
Posts: 35
Joined: Sat Nov 29, 2008 4:29 pm

Re: Quick Comma Question

Postby mjd » Wed Nov 03, 2010 11:18 pm

Why not combine the two sentences? As they are presently written and related, they would not compose a run-on sentence and would convey a single thought (which seems to be what you are trying to do).

"As the two of us began talking, we discussed the possibility of growing the group, and as that summer progressed, we formulated a business plan and mission statement to become the premier student organization on campus."

WayBryson
Posts: 179
Joined: Fri Sep 10, 2010 8:24 pm

Re: Quick Comma Question

Postby WayBryson » Wed Nov 03, 2010 11:43 pm

In general, if the subject of a sentence does not also begin a sentence then a comma precedes it. And I don't think there is any problem with starting the sentence with "and." Sometimes, it is just the right fit between a run-on sentence and a semicolon.

lolol10
Posts: 181
Joined: Sat Oct 09, 2010 2:39 pm

Re: Quick Comma Question

Postby lolol10 » Wed Nov 03, 2010 11:54 pm

grammar=dumb. who gives a f about an oxford comma? use commas to clarify things. effective writing is clear, precise and concise. if you are writing long a sentence that you dont know how to properly punctuate, rewrite the sentence.

Renzo
Posts: 4265
Joined: Tue Dec 02, 2008 3:23 am

Re: Quick Comma Question

Postby Renzo » Thu Nov 04, 2010 12:50 am

lolol10 wrote:grammar=dumb. who gives a f about an oxford comma? use commas to clarify things. effective writing is clear, precise and concise. if you are writing long a sentence that you dont know how to properly punctuate, rewrite the sentence.

These guys care about $2.13 million about an oxford comma. (LinkRemoved)




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